It doesn't have anything to do with the econony, but I am wishing tonight that I could start again at this same time in 1986. It has to do with a song and someone I wish I could talk to again, Keith. I hate to have regrets about things that I should have given more time to. Maybe that's what ghosts are, things in your mind that were unresolved that come back to haunt you every once in awhile. That is the same case with my first relationship, Steve, who I wish I could talk to one more time to just realize what happened. I left and never talked to him again. It wasn't right to spend that amount of time with someone who I loved, went through so many things with, and then leave things hanging in the air forever. Yes, we were young (around 18 and 19), but it still was important. I will never forget the first time I saw him and he saw me. It truly was magic at the time. I dreamed about him the night I first saw him and then things went from there. It was really like magic and sometimes I wonder if those kind of feelings can ever really happen again. We had some very bad times, but were they really that bad after all? I left him after us being together for more than a year and a half and never even gave him the time for us to talk about it. At the time it seemed the right thing to do, but life continued on and revealed that there were much worse times to come. I will wonder forever what happened to him cause he still has a part of my heart and I can't help but wonder if I still have a piece of his somewhere in his distant thoughts. I guess I will never know.