APPLYING the LESSONS of BBM to YOUR LIFE

[Ray]

I was talking today with a very amazing friend about the role of spirituality in my life, and I questioned whether the 'higher being' that has 'forced' me to be fallible in life could also be the force that encourages my success.  I asked why I should accept one, whilst ignoring the existence of the other.  My 'higher being' is independent of other's in that I have found it within myself, rather than looking skyward, or in a book, or in a creed from other's expectations.  My higher being is my sense of fairness to myself, to those who wish to share my space,  and ultimately to the judgement of conscience.  My higher being allows me to say sorry and feel sorry, to explore wrong to discover right, to find my limits and to impose restrictions, and to allow the world its diversity whilst trying to find my own stability.  My spirituality demands nothing but respect in response to the same offering.  We are not too dissimilar, you and I, in our destination and in time we will accept each other's independent journeys.

[TJ]

In the realm of spirituality, every individual has to do his or her own walking of the path.

While it seems that some people are on different paths, it is stil the same path.

I like the Native American expression, "Walking the Red Road" and since the Hebrew word, "Adam," or "Edom" (same Hebrew Letters), also means "red," that makes sense, too.

[Sheyne]

Gosh, I have nothing but praise for the people who've posted on here thus far.

Victoria, I didn't know a lot of what you posted until I read it and I got a little misty-eyed for you. What a brave woman you are, my respect has deepened yet again.  I guess reading what you wrote has given me a little hope that maybe... just maybe one day, I may be able to open up my heart to love again. I shut the door nearly 3 years ago after the demise of a relationship.. i, too, fell into a terrible depression and was medicated for some time. I have a young son to look after too - I sympathise with you, I really do. I don't have 2 kids, just the one, but he's Autistic, as many people already know, so I like to think he's worth two or three kids, really.  And when I fell to bits after that relationship, Will really suffered for a while there. For nearly 18 months, he had to cope with his mum completely and physically unable to get out of bed or trying to function on NO sleep because I had spent the night staring out the window and crying.  I'd never been train-wrecked like that before and I promised myself that never again would my little boy have to see me like that over some guy.  Hence, door closed.

I'd love to be Jack Twist when it comes to love, but when I fall, I fall hard and I'm a little more on the Ennis side these days. Not willing to take a risk. It sucks. And its a weakness, but I'm aware of it. And strangely okay with it, if that makes any sense.  I don't really know what the future holds for me, but while my little one needs me like he does, I need to be there for him.. 

Still, your story gives me some hope. Thanks so much for sharing it.

[vkm91941]

First I want to thank rt for starting yet another excellent thread.  Thank you friend!  I want to tell you all, that while we may not always see eye to eye on things I value, appreciate, and respect the contribution each of you makes here you have all touched my life and my heart in so many ways.  Blessings on you all....     That said....................

SHEYNE!,  my dear girl…first let me thank you for your kind words and let me say that the respect and admiration is mutual.  You have always struck me as a sympathetic, levelheaded, kindhearted, caring, fun, lively, intelligent, and very pleasant young woman.  Any man would be lucky, no blessed, to have you and your son in his life.

Reading your description of your depression and despair reminds me so much of my own pain and my heart breaks for you.  You poor son, He must have felt the pain of Mommy acutely.  Autisic children are so often very empathtic even though it doesn't always show.    My oldest still remembers his father’s funeral and he was barely 4 years old. The images he retains are of me and my grief.  Yep like Ennis when we fall we fall hard and totally.  I use to tell people that I had my soul mate.  I could not expect to find that again.  Lightening does not strike twice.  Cinderella only gets one Prince and some women never get any.  I was content to be alone with my boys, accepting that, that part of my life was over.

But, rest assured dear heart you have no idea what fate has in store for you. It blindsided me.   As I learned lightening does indeed strike twice and there is more than one Prince in the world and they come in all shapes and sizes at the moment when you least expect them.  You only have to be open to the moment and say yes when it arrives.     I personally wish you all the best and all the love your heart can hold.

And if any guy hurts you again... call me.... well hunt him down and grill his liver for the dog!  LOL just kidding..sort of 

[Sheyne]

And if any guy hurts you again... call me.... well hunt him down and grill his liver for the dog!  LOL just kidding..sort of 

What's your number, again??

 

You had a lot of lovely things to say here.  Reckon I might address them via PM.. 

[rtprod]

You only have to be open to the moment and say yes when it arrives.

Vic, isn't this the truth of life?  I think often in life we're afraid to say yes because we think somehow that we don't deserve to feel as good as we do.

The answer is really much more simple than everything we unnecessarily heap on top of it --- yeah, we do.  We really do.

For everyone: 

rt

[Kelda]

who says a film can't change lives? 

How has brokeback changed my life? I've met some wonderful friends, learned a lot from all of you guys, and hope I've grown from that.

I understand my life is good, yes it is, and I should be more appreciative of that, and I've learnt that life is there for the taking. Grab it with both hands. And don't let go. Ride each wave, and be honest about and open to your feelings.

You only have to be open to the moment and say yes when it arrives.

Great little sentence, and so true.

Love to everyone,
 
K
x

[TJ]

As far as what has happened in my life after seeing the movie, I have not made any friends online because of the movie where we might even communicate outside of internet forums.

I have made a cyber-friend who has belonged to a BbM related Yahoo Group where I was just a member and we do IMs a lot.

When I was active on America Online in 1998 through 2001, I met some people online whom I talked to on the phone. Because I mentioned that I had a problem financially and asked for prayer from some Christian friends who were gay or accepted them in the fall of '98, I was surprised when some of them actually asked me to give them my mailing address so that they could send me some money. I was not getting HUD Section 8 rental assistance at the time and trying to pay for all of my rent out of my own pocket.

One of those ladies, Margaret, had lost her gay son who was also a Christian and we ended up sort of cyber-adopting each other. We actually talked on the phone a lot, she was in Missouri at the time and I called her my cyber-mom. I also relayed messages from her to my own mother and from Mom back to her.

I called Margaret's brother, "Uncle Ben." Ben was a WII veteran and I helped him get some help from the VA in 2001. I did not do it directly but, I did some research for him and he was able to get his Social Security supplemented by a non-service connected VA pension.