Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > Brokeback Mountain Open Forum
Love Scene
Katie77:
Once again Fiona, your words stir up memories, and and anxieties. I am so glad, when I had my kids, I did not have to contend with societies reactions to our actions with our own children. It pisses me off, that parents now, have in the back of their mind, that normal actions like your child getting into bed with you, may be looked at, as something wrong or dirty, damwell pisses me off. I am not pissed with the parents, but with society for making them that way.
It brought back a memory for me, that I cherish......Back in 1971, I was 19 and 7 months pregnant with my first son, my dear 22 yr old sister had just been killed in a boating accident, and at the time my husband was in the navy and we were on a navy base 8000 miles from my family. I flew down to Sydney to be with my family, and my husband had to stay at the naval base. One night, I was visiting some dear friends of mine and my sisters, they were my parents age, and the most beautiful and caring people you could imagine, and they were an enormous comfort to me in my time of grief. I was too upset to drive home from visiting them, so decided to stay the night. I went to bed, and my friends heard me crying, alone in my bed, so the wife, Rose, said, come in with us and we will give you a cuddle. I did not think twice, about crawling into their bed, slept in the middle of them, and felt the comfort and love from both of them. Never once, did the thought that this was anything more than a parent/child sort of connection ever cross my mind or their mind. It was so natural and a normal occurence that I spoke about it to my friends and family later, in the same way as I spoke about them making me a cup of tea, and the reactions or non reactions from those I told, were the same as mine.
As I sit here now writing about it, I cherish the memory, and am overhwlemed with the fact that I was able to experience something so wonderful and remember that night, as one of the most beautiful outpoouring of love that some people never get the chance to experience.
injest:
--- Quote from: tampatalon on September 08, 2008, 03:49:54 am ---I have found this thread very enlightening with the views profiled here.
From my view as a gay male I remember being absolutely shocked at the
FNIT scene in a Tampa theatre that night. I did not know much about BBM
before I went but I knew I must see it. The sexual act of course did not shock me
and flowed very naturally but as soon as it was over I was startled. As I sat in the
theatre in the moment it was over you could hear a pin drop. Stunned I did not
believe I just saw such a private moment between the boys and felt like I had
stumbled into it, like walking in on your parents. I looked around and the audience
seemed to try to adjust themselves as well as I did back to normal. Or should I
use the world normal? After Brokeback life changed and never went back to what
was normal. Thanks to the boys and Brokeback. I never have to try to be the "old"
normal again.
Brokeback released me to live!
TampaTalon ^">
--- End quote ---
I just realized something...and it is so surprizing to me to have an epiphany about this movie after all this time, and after so many viewings. For a long time I have expressed my surprise (and chagrin) that my SON and I share the same taste in men, dark, affectionate, self confident, tall, good sense of humor, etc...
I just realized that in the FNIT, Jack imitates what my husband does when he wants to have sex.....when I am asleep or drifting off and he wants to 'test the water' he will send one hand over as a scout to see if I will welcome or reject it...Jack takes Ennis's hand and pulls it over to 'test the water'!!
It is another thing that reminds me (as if I need it) that gays and straights aren't that different after all. not really, not down deep where it matters.
optom3:
--- Quote from: injest on September 10, 2008, 01:25:11 am ---I just realized something...and it is so surprizing to me to have an epiphany about this movie after all this time, and after so many viewings. For a long time I have expressed my surprise (and chagrin) that my SON and I share the same taste in men, dark, affectionate, self confident, tall, good sense of humor, etc...
I just realized that in the FNIT, Jack imitates what my husband does when he wants to have sex.....when I am asleep or drifting off and he wants to 'test the water' he will send one hand over as a scout to see if I will welcome or reject it...Jack takes Ennis's hand and pulls it over to 'test the water'!!
It is another thing that reminds me (as if I need it) that gays and straights aren't that different after all. not really, not down deep where it matters.
--- End quote ---
I thought BBM had revealed everything to me by now. What you say about your husband is exactly what mine does !!! We are none of us that different.
Mandy21:
Gabreya, thank you for starting this one. Reading it now for the first time, it seems a lot of folks have something to get off their chests, so to speak, about these scenes.
To try to stay on topic, I, as a mostly-straight (I've kissed a couple girls myself, Fiona:), and it was lovely) woman, was gigantically turned on by both sex scenes. Number 1, helllllooooo, it was Heath and Jake, for goodness' sake, and number 2, it was finally the culmination of what we, as viewers, knew would be the outcome (no pun intended, sorry), but that they, as Ennis and Jack, weren't sure would actually happen. So the intrigue and mystery and waiting only added to the excitement of that first night. Honestly, I didn't think it would be as quick as it was, but I'm guessing that's something the censors controlled, rather than truly reflecting reality between two men. But then again, I've never in real life, seen two men making love for the first time, so what do I know?
I think everyone has certain sexual preferences, for lots of reasons. Maybe based on what they've seen in the movies as they were growing up, or seen in real life, or something a lover turned them on to, or any number of other things. I've never in my life judged two people who wanted to be together. And if there's love involved, as opposed to just like or lust, then all the better.
It is unfortunate for men in this society, that they don't get the approval and/or opportunity, to express their affection or sadness or other emotions with men. But women get to, without a second glance. This has always bothered me, that old pat-two-or-three-times-hard-on-the-back hug thing that men do. I think that's part of why I like BBM so much. Ennis and Jack, they never did that. Every time, it was either all or nothing between them, and when I say that, I mean, it started as a look, several looks actually, and a handshake. Every reunion thereafter, including their final moments together (ouch!), was marked with the most giant of hugs and happiness and love oozing out of both of them. I think they set an example that all men should see. It's okay to express your emotions, not just to the women in your life, but to every person in your life.
And I agree with another thing on this thread. Whenever I had a nightmare as a child and as a teenager back in the 80's, which was a lot, there was never a second's hesitation in crawling into bed between my mom and dad, and being comforted by both of them, back to slumber. Was a simpler time then, I guess. Sad to say. I know I couldn't have made it through a lot of nights, without them there to assure me there'd be better dreams to come. Some nights now, when I can't sleep, I drive over to my mom and dad's empty house, and crawl into that bed, somewhere in the crack, between the two pillows, where all my nightmares stopped...
Katie77:
I agree with you Mandy about men showing affection to one another. If I see two men having a real strong lengthy hug, I get quite emotional, because it is such an outpouring of their feelings towards one another. Maybe because it only happens occassionally, when it does happen, it seems to be more sincere and spontaneous.
The hugs and holding between Jack and Ennis are so intense, you can hear the slaps on their jackets, see their bodies crushing into each other and feel the "cant get close enough" connection between the two of them. Those grasping clutches, to me, had nothing to do with them being gay, but more to do with the fact that they competely adored and loved each other. It showed how comfortable they felt, attached to each other. Its like if they hold onto each other hard enough, nothing can separate them, and while they are attached, the rest of the world cant hurt them.
Regardless of the sex scenes, or whether a viewer of the movie approved of them or not, anyone with any feelings could not have ever doubted the intensity of their love while watching those bone crutching connections.
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