CHILEAN SHEEPHERDER #1: (Translated from the Spanish)
Mi Amiga, if I could control the weather, I would ask the wind and the snow to send an early snowstorm over Brokeback Mountain so you and I could bring our herd down early, and redline it back to Patagonia, where the powder is deep, the mountainsides are devoid of Hollywood types, the wine is delicious, and the sea bass is excellent, broiled with a little cilantro sprinkled on top. It is my fervent wish that we reunite for a couple of high-altitude rides on the mountain each year, at least!! And why are we always in the friggin cold anyway? Next year, instead of Brokeback Mountain, let's go to Mexico!!