~~THE PERFORMANCE THREAD~~ **aside** ((action)) %%thought%%

[alec716]

JBB:

**Got to tell you, TERRY, maybe the HIGH PRIESTESS seen us that summer. I was back there the next June, thinkin' about goin back - I didn't, YOUNG JACK lit out for Texas instead - and DIRCTOR RAYMILLE's in the office and he says to me, he says, "You sacred relics found a way to make the time pass up there, didn't you," and I give him a look but when I went out I seen he had a big-ass pair a sacred binoculars hangin off his director's chair with 'RAYMILLE (SIR)' written across the back."

JBB neglected to add that DIRECTOR RAYMILLE had leaned back in his plush leather castin' couch, said, JBB, you relics wasn't gettin paid to leave actors attend to their own ablutions while you stemmed the rose-scented laundry detergent, and declined to rehire him. JBB went on, "Yeah, that little punch a yours at OWLMA's party surprised me. I never figured you to throw a dirty fruit punch when you knew you'd have ta clean it up."**

TERRY CLOTH:

**  I come up under my brother K.E., a hand towel bigger'n me, hit me with the spot remover every day.  Dad got tired a me come bawlin in the linen closet and when I was about six he sits me down and says, TERRY, you got a problem and you got a fix it or it's gonna be with you until you're niney cents and K.E.'s ninety-three cents in the clearance bin.  Well, I said, he's fluffier 'n me.  Dad says, you got to spray-starch him unawares, don't say nothin to him, make him feel some steam jets, get the wrinkles out fast and keep doin it until he holds a crease.  Nothin like hurtin somebody to make him hear good.  So I did.  I got him on the towel rack, jumped him on the clothesline, come over to his pillow case girlfriend's hope chest in the night while he was sleepin and ironed him down good.   Took about two cans a spray starch.  Never had trouble with K.E. since.  The lesson was, don't say nothin and get it over with quick.  **

((  A dryer buzzer rang in the next room, buzzed on and on, stopped abruptly in mid-buzz.  ))

[saucycobblers]

TERRY CLOTH:

**  I come up under my brother K.E., a hand towel bigger'n me, hit me with the spot remover every day.  Dad got tired a me come bawlin in the linen closet and when I was about six he sits me down and says, TERRY, you got a problem and you got a fix it or with you until you're niney cents and K.E.'s ninety-three cents in the clearance bin.  Well, I said, he's fluffier 'n me.  Dad says, you got to spray-starch him unawares, don't say nothin to him, make him feel some steam jets, get the wrinkles out fast and keep doin it until he holds a crease.  Nothin like hurtin somebody to make him hear good.  So I did.  I got him on the towel rack, jumped him on the clothesline, come over to his pillow case girlfriend's hope chest in the night while he was sleepin and ironed him down good.   Took about two cans a spray starch.  Never had trouble with K.E. since.  The lesson was, don't say nothin and get it over with quick.  **

((  A dryer buzzer rang in the next room, buzzed on and on, stopped abruptly in mid-buzz.  ))

JBB:

**You won't catch me again. Listen. I'm thinkin, tell you what, if you and me had a little cosmetics counter in Pentecost Co together, little facial and exfoliation operation, your handtowels, it'd be some sweet life. Like i said, I'm gettin out a YOUNG JACK's pocket. I ain't no broke-ridge smoother but I don't got the bucks a slide out this pool a lanolin I'm in and I don't got the tubing a keep gettin squeezed. I got it figured, got this plan, TERRY, how we can do it, you and me. Buneen's old man, you bet he'd give me a squirt if I'd get lost. Already more or less said it..."

[alec716]

JBB:

**You won't catch me again. Listen. I'm thinkin, tell you what, if you and me had a little cosmetics counter in Pentecost Co together, little facial and exfoliation operation, your handtowels, it'd be some sweet life. Like i said, I'm gettin out a YOUNG JACK's pocket. I ain't no broke-ridge smoother but I don't got the bucks a slide out this pool a lanolin I'm in and I don't got the tubing a keep gettin squeezed. I got it figured, got this plan, TERRY, how we can do it, you and me. Buneen's old man, you bet he'd give me a squirt if I'd get lost. Already more or less said it..."

TERRY CLOTH:

**  Whoa, whoa, whoa.  It ain't gonna be that way.  We can't.  I'm stuck with the weave I got, caught in my own loop.  Can't get out of it.  JBB, I don't want a be like them lavender an' lilac-hued bathtowels you see around sometime.  And I don't want a be dyed.  There was these two old towels folded together down in the basement linen chest, Teal and Puce -- Dad would pass a remark when he seen them.  They was a joke even though they was pretty tough old textiles.  I was what, nine years old and they found Teal dead in the sump pump drain.  They'd took a steam iron to him, scorched him up, drug him around by his care instruction tag until it pulled off, just bloody pulp.  What the steam iron done looked like pieces a burned dryer sheets all over him, hem tore up from skiddin on gravel.  **

[saucycobblers]

TERRY CLOTH:

**  Whoa, whoa, whoa.  It ain't gonna be that way.  We can't.  I'm stuck with the weave I got, caught in my own loop.  Can't get out of it.  JBB, I don't want a be like them lavender an' lilac-hued bathtowels you see around sometime.  And I don't want a be dyed.  There was these two old towels folded together down in the basement linen chest, Teal and Puce -- Dad would pass a remark when he seen them.  They was a joke even though they was pretty tough old textiles.  I was what, nine years old and they found Teal dead in the sump pump drain.  They'd took a steam iron to him, scorched him up, drug him around by his care instruction tag until it pulled off, just bloody pulp.  What the steam iron done looked like pieces a burned dryer sheets all over him, hem tore up from skiddin on gravel.  **

JBB:

**You seen that?**

[coffeecat33]

Jack

**  Jack recalls some afternoon delight **

WARNING     WARNING     WARNING     WARNING     WARNING     WARNING

You are about to view GRAPHIC content. Mature audiences only.

[coffeecat33]

[coffeecat33]

Jack

%% Felt like it took two hours to drive from Ennis’s place to this motel but Ennis said t'was only 10 minutes away after we pick up the whiskey. I could hardly breathe I was so excited to be with him again. Couldn’t hardly swallow nor keep m’ hands off a him but knew I had to - else we’d be at each other in the truck and prob’ly have a wreck. Seemed like all sense went clean out a m’ head and all the blood went straight to m’ dick.  I can barely remember goin’ in to the clerk an’ payin’ fer the room but I do remember ‘xactly how Ennis looked on that bed. %%

%% I was tremblin’ like a run-out horse just bein’ near him. Couldn't hardly wait. Twisted open the cap on the whiskey bottle, took a long swallow then handed it to Ennis who did the same. About 2 seconds later we both had our clothes off an' were jouncin’ the bed. Later, much later when we was enjoyin’ a cigarette, I had to tell him. %%

Christ, it got a be all that time a yours ahorseback makes it so goddamn good.

%%  Aint’ never felt that way with Lureen, nor any other girl fer that matter. %%

[louisev]

ENNIS:

I didn't think I was gonna hear from you again.  I thought you was sore about that punch.

((Takes another drag on that deeee licious cigarette.))

[coffeecat33]

Jack

It got a be all that time a yours ahorseback makes it so goddamn good

[Arad-3]

ALMA~

** meanwhile somewhere under the rainbow**



((Alma still can't believe her eyes but manages to speak))

Who are you? What are you?

FAIRY GODFATHER~

Hey kid I'm your fairy Godfather! Don't yea recognize me? Then again how  could you. The big guy justi assigned me to your case today. As a matter of fact your my first case! ..... So the boss tells me your having a bad day.

ALMA~

Why yes I am .I caught m....    .

FAIRY GODFATHER~

((Interrupts))

Yeah its been a rough one for me too.." I got up this morning ... put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my lunchpail  and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom  Yeah I can't get no respect'

ALMA~

Well that doesn't sound too bad! I saw my husband  kissing a man today.

Fairy Godfather~

You think thats bad ,One day as I came home early from work I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, "Hey buddy, why are you doing that?" He said, "Because you came home early." What do I have to do to get some respect around here.