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Alma's feelings for Ennis

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Penthesilea:
This keeps bothering me for a while now: What are Alma's feelings for Ennis?

Marrying, raising children, leading a family life was what Alma was supposed to do. Maybe it was not her big dream of life, but I think Alma was not raised to have big dreams (like Ennis - and Jack for that matter, but he had them anyhow).

Did Alma have dreams other than having a husband and children when she was a teenager, before she married Ennis? I don't think so.
I think she was successfully trained to want this (the family life) and actually DID want it.
For this purpose she needed a man, willing to marry her. God knows how they met and fell for each other at least enough to get engaged (any ideas, other from them being introduced and pushed by their families?).

I do think she loved him.
I do think she was loyal and devoted.
I do think she made efforts to keep this marriage going.
I know it was a shock for her to see our boys together.
I do think her whole world was falling apart during that night when Ennis and Jack were in the Siesta.

But I do not believe that, at any time of their realtionship, Ennis was everything to her. The one love you desperately long for, the one person in the world you are meant for, the one person you can't live without.

I think it was the whole package she wanted: husband + kids + a nice place to call home + enough money to keep ahead of the bills = a 'normal' family life. And Ennis seemed to be the man who could give this to her. But somehow I have the feeling, she would have taken another man, too - if only he was likeable enough and promised her the said package.

This is supported by the story: how undramatic their marriage came to an end. No real trouble, just widening water, "...what am I doing, hanging around with him, divorced Ennis and married the Riverton grocer".

Doesn't sound like she was a heartbroken woman, destoyed by the realization that her husband didn't love her like he should.

Phew, I rambled a lot here, just let my thoughts flow. Bottom line is: I think Alma loved Ennis, but I do not think she loved him so deeply that he meant the world to her.

mvansand76:
I think she was expecting from Ennis what every woman should be able to expect from the man she marries, that he would love her and be faithful to her. When both those things did not turn out to be true, she put up her defenses and went for the next big thing, Monroe.

I do believe Alma loved Ennis very much, mostly because he was so emotionally unavailable (same reason why Cassie fell in love I guess, he was such an enigma and so manly and the combination can be really attractive) and she really hung on to the signs of affection from Ennis through the years. I think, though, as soon as she had been directly confronted with Ennis and where Ennis' heart really lay, she put up a barrier and emotionally distanced herself from him to avoid being hurt.

Do I make sense?  ;)

serious crayons:
I've never known exactly how to interpret her expression at the Thanksgiving table, but I've never seen it as all that fond. To me, she looks kind of peevish, though trying to maintain a cordial veneer. If I had to guess, I would say she is uncomfortable that her new husband, with his vibrator electric knife, appears so wimpy compared to her ex, with his rugged bronc-riding tale. And the girls so obviously adore their dad, again no doubt in contrast to their feelings for their step-dad. The weird look that Ennis gives Alma after telling the story adds to my impression that there is tension in the room.

As for Alma's feelings while they were still married, I think she loved Ennis. But I don't think the love was particularly passionate, because she just wasn't a passionate person. Nor did she really expect passion from him. As Chrissi says, her expectations from life were pretty simple: husband, kids, place in town she can fix up real nice. Once she had those things, she didn't look much beyond them. That's why she didn't realize anything was amiss with Ennis until she saw how different he was with Jack.

fernly:
Chrissi - great idea for a thread! I've wondered too how they got together, how much 'initiative', conversational and otherwise, Alma showed in pursuing the relationship.


--- Quote --- The weird look that Ennis gives Alma after telling the story adds to my impression that there is tension in the room.

--- End quote ---
That looks reminds me of the one Ennis gives Jack when he asks him about everybody knowing. I wonder if maybe he thought that saddle bronc story was a step or two too close to Jack who he had told Alma "rodeos mostly."

Far as Alma's expression - goadra and Katherine, can I agree with both of you?
 I can easily believe that she was experiencing a lot of different emotions.
Resentful that the girls were his angels and she never was (recalls the moment in the story when Ennis tells Jack that he loves his two little girls to pieces and says nothing about how he feels about Alma, and her mouth twitches)/
rexperiencing for a moment the old feeling of being in love with him and feeling happy when he is/
angry about Jack/
pleased that she's making another life for herself.
 But keeping it all under control best she can, trying to be nice, and then Ennis makes that comment about once burned, and Alma has her 'lake scene', by a sink full of dirty dishes.

serious crayons:

--- Quote from: fernly on October 02, 2006, 10:42:50 am --- Alma has her 'lake scene', by a sink full of dirty dishes.
--- End quote ---

Good observation, Fern! I never noticed that as being another instance of Alma and Jack contrasted via tap water vs. outdoor water.

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