The World Beyond BetterMost > Women Today
Woman decides full-time mothering isn't for her
louisev:
Social research has shown that losing contact with one parent after divorce is detrimental to children of any age -- which is part of why even in cases of child abuse, the non-custodial parents are more and more being granted visitation because it is better for the children. The problem is not that a woman wished to end her custodial parenthood - but that non-custodial parents who don't maintain an active relationship with their children is detrimental to their healthy development.
Luvlylittlewing:
--- Quote from: Shasta542 on March 06, 2011, 08:20:17 pm --- :) You are a great and loving mother! With a wonderful and lucky daughter. :-* :-*
--- End quote ---
Thanks, Sweetie! I'm just a product of how I was raised. I'm not saying the woman in the story had terrible role models, but I was raised by a woman who put my brother, my sister and I first in so many ways. When my parents divorced my mom did little else besides work, sew for us, take us to church and cook meals. She never dated, nor did she once leave us alone or with relatives - ever. My dad was also selfless. One day I was visiting him before he passed and he told me with a smile, "You guys liked a lot of money. I had to work hard."
For me walking away from my child is not an option. As Louise observed, children suffer when they're abandoned by either parent. Being a single parent is hard, very hard, but I'm hanging in there, even though my daughter is now an adult and engaged. I wouldn't have it any other way.
pnwDUDE:
--- Quote from: louisev on March 06, 2011, 08:32:27 pm --- The problem is not that a woman wished to end her custodial parenthood - but that non-custodial parents who don't maintain an active relationship with their children is detrimental to their healthy development.
--- End quote ---
Based on what some are saying here, Louise, that's apparantley ok so long as the parent (this woman in the case cited) feels good about herself. They could care less about the development of the children.
Brad
Monika:
--- Quote from: BoobieWaffleTush on March 06, 2011, 08:52:38 pm ---Thanks, Sweetie! I'm just a product of how I was raised. I'm not saying the woman in the story had terrible role models, but I was raised by a woman who put my brother, my sister and I first in so many ways. When my parents divorced my mom did little else besides work, sew for us, take us to church and cook meals. She never dated, nor did she once leave us alone or with relatives - ever. My dad was also selfless. One day I was visiting him before he passed and he told me with a smile, "You guys liked a lot of money. I had to work hard."
--- End quote ---
I hear you, but from a child´s perspective I want my parents to be happy. I wouldn´t want my parents to basically give up their lives for me. I want them to live their lives cause seeing the parents happy makes the kids happy too. There is a way to be a parent AND to live your life.
Monika:
--- Quote from: Kelda on March 06, 2011, 05:02:01 pm ---Yes, I read that she didn't make the decision until after she had them. But this isn't buying a car or a house. This is a human being. Anyone having a child know that this is a long haul decision and should be prepared to be in it for the long haul. Whether they suddenly realise too late its not their ideal lifestyle or not.
And I'm talking both men and women and here.
--- End quote ---
I agree, but I think a point here is that if this had been a man, it had never made the news at all.
People are upset because it is woman.
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