The World Beyond BetterMost > Anything Goes
Kerry's Komedy Klub
Shasta542:
--- Quote from: dot-matrix on September 06, 2007, 02:18:09 pm ---A man escaped prison by digging a tunnel from his cell to
the outside world. Emerging in the middle of a pre-school
playground, he shouted "I'm free, I'm Free !!"
"So what, " said a little girl, "I'm four !"
:laugh:
--- End quote ---
How cute! ;D
pettifogger:
For weeks a six year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house.
One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements ofthe unborn child. The six year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacherabout the impending event.
The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, “Tommy, whatever has become of that baby brother or sister you were expecting at home?”
Tommy burst into tears and confessed, “I think Mommy ate it.”
pettifogger:
Two old ladies are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain. One old lady pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continues smoking.
Maude : What in the hell is that ?
Mabel : A condom. This way my cigarette doesn’t get wet.
Maude : Where did you get it ?
Mabel : You can get them at any drugstore.
The next day, Maude hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.
The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely (she is after all, over 80 years of age), but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.
“Doesn’t matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a camel.”
The pharmacist fainted.
Kerry:
dot-matrix:
An old man lived in the country. He wanted to dig his potato garden but it was hard work as the ground was so hard. His son Fred who used to help him was in prison. The old man wrote to him, and described his predicament:
Dear Fred,
I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my potato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over as I know you would dig it for me,
Love,
Dad
A few days later he received a letter from his son –
Dear Dad;
For heaven’s sake Dad don’t dig up that garden, that’s where I buried the BODIES!
Love,
Fred
At 4 am the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologised to the old man and left. The same day the old man received another letter from his son
Dear Dad;
Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love,
Fred
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