Kerry's Komedy Klub

[Kerry]

Jack and his friend Rob went on a fishing trip. They packed their car and headed North, into the mountains.
After travelling for a few hours, they were caught by a storm, and luckily found a farm where they could seek shelter.
The farm was owned by a rich widow, who had a lovely big house with plenty of room, but she was reluctant to let them stay for the night.
She explained to the boys that she was worried that the neighbours might gossip.
The boys pleaded with her, and said they would be happy to stay in her barn, so she relented.

In the morning, the weather had cleared, and the boys went on their way.

Nine months later, Jack received a letter from a firm of lawyers. He drove over to Rob's house and confronted him.

'Do you remember that fishing trip, nine months ago, and how we stayed the night in that widow's barn?' he asked.
'Ah .. yes, I do', said Rob with a grin.

'And did you sneak up to her house in the middle of the night?' asked Jack.
Ahhh ... yes.'

'And did you happen to make love to her, and use my name instead of your own?' Jack insisted.
Ahhhh  ... well ... ummm  .... yes, I'm afraid I did.' Rob mumbled. 'I'm real sorry mate, I just couldn't help it. Why?'

'Well, she just died and left me everything.'

I'm a firm believer in cosmic justice! 

[Kerry]

[Kerry]

(I bet you're smiling right now!) 

[TXdoug]

 

 

 

[underdown]

Hmmm, I volunteer to sit up all night with a big, burly, insomniac trucker!    I'm sure we'll find a constructive way to pass the time!    He might even let me drive his big rig!   

   

    KERRY !!

 

[underdown]

Hi Katie77   

[Kerry]

[Katie77]

Tale of the Irish Sausage

Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't  have a lot of
money between them, they could only
raise the staggering sum of one Euro.

Murphy said "Hang on, I have an idea."

He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.

Shamus said "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any  money left at all!"

Murphy replied, "Don't worry - just follow me."

He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two  pints of
Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson Whisky.

Shamus said "Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will
be in? We haven't got any money!!"

Murphy replied, with a smile. "Don't worry, I have a  plan, Cheers!"

They downed their Drinks. Murphy said, "OK, I'll stick  the sausage
through my zipper and you go on your knees
and put it in your mouth."

The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them  out.
 They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for free.

At the tenth pub Shamus said "Murphy - I don't think I   can do any
more of this. I'm drunk and me knees are
killin'me!"

Murphy said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub.
















 
 

[Kerry]

Murphy said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub.

               

[Kerry]