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Kerry's Komedy Klub

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dot-matrix:
Things you should NEVER say to a Cop



1. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

2. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

3. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

4. Are You Andy or Barney?

5. I thought you had to be in good physical condition to be a police officer.

6. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

7. I pay your salary!

8. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

9. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

10. I was trying to keep up with traffic. I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

11. When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

dot-matrix:

Kerry:


   
  A man was  driving down the road and ran out of  petrol.
            Just  at that moment, a bee flew in his window.
           
   The  bee said, "What seems to be the problem"?
         
         "I'm  out of Petrol!"
           
The  bee told the man to wait right there
  And flew away. Minutes later, the  man
  Watched as an  entire swarm of bees flew
 To  his car and into his gas tank. After a
 Few minutes, the bees flew  out.
           
"Try  it now," said one bee.
           
The  man turned the ignition key and the
   Car started right  up.
       "Wow!"  the man exclaimed.
            "What  did you put in my  tank"?
             
The  bee answered, "BP."

Kerry:

This is more quirky than funny, I guess. But still amusing in a macabre sort of way.   :-\

Psychopath Test

Read this question, come up with an answer. This is not a trick question. It is as it reads. No-one I know has got it right.
 
A woman, while at the funeral of her own mother, met a guy whom she did not know. She thought this guy was amazing. She believed him to be her dream guy so much, that she fell in love with him right there, but never asked for his number and could not find him. A few days later she killed her sister.   :P
 
Question: What is her motive for killing her sister?   ???

[Give this some thought before scrolling down for the correct answer]





Have you given it a lot of thought?





Think you've got the right answer?





Only scroll down when you think you've got it right!





I got it wrong!





Maybe you'll have better luck than me!





Here's the correct answer . . . . .





She killed her sister solely in the hope of getting the guy to attend the funeral, so she could see him again, and presumably remember to get his phone number this time!  If you answered this correctly, you think like a . . . . .

psychopath!

This was a test by a famous psychologist, used to test if one has the same mentality as a killer. Many arrested serial killers took part in the test and answered the question correctly.

If you didn't answer the question correctly, good for you!  :D

dot-matrix:
How about a little politcal humor with bite


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