Author Topic: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death  (Read 56142 times)

Offline ENEN

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #90 on: January 31, 2008, 08:20:40 pm »
I'm not going to get into a slanging match with anyone here, but I think that some of the threads could very well be upsetting to Heath's family and friends ... I've found some of them very upsetting myself, which is why I've stayed away from them.

Susie  :)

They are upsetting because they deal with the tragic loss of such a fine young man. When I said RPS would be upsetting to Heath's family and friends I meant upsetting in a way that they would find the material offensive and disrespectful. I don't think they would find that in those other threads. They are dedicated to Heath Ledger The Man Heath Ledger The Human Being.. RPS is Heath Ledger the Lie, Heath Ledger And Jake Gyllenhaal Having sex. Big difference.

Offline Jeff Wrangler

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #91 on: January 31, 2008, 11:42:45 pm »
I think what it boils down to, realistically, is that those who feel moved to declare their own moratoriums, do so and not be shy about doing so, because I am not sure anyone's opinion will be changed by this point.

I think you're right, Louise. I doubt that anyone who felt that RPS--and by the "S" here I specifically mean sex--stories about Heath were acceptable when he was alive are going to find them unacceptable now that he's dead.
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Offline souxi

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #92 on: February 01, 2008, 07:16:14 am »
No I was referring to discussions that I find disrespectful.  I find it disrespectful to bicker over whether or not some masseuse should or shouldn't have done something sooner, I find it disrespectful to batter the Olsen twin for going out for a drink, I find it disrespectful to bully Jake Gyllenhaal into making a public statement (no one has suggested Julie Stiles or Sienna Miller make one) and ...... I know I'm going to get shot for this one .... I find it disrespectful to put Heath so high on a pedestal that he's become almost saint-like and I find it very upsetting when people here talk as though they are about to throw themselves out of a window.

He was a wonderful actor, and from what we've seen in interviews, he seemed like a thoroughly likeable guy ... someone I'd definitely like to get to know better... and I felt so very deeply sad when I heard about his tragic death.  But all this hero-worshiping and squabbling and bickering is upsetting and in my opinion, disrespectful.

But as I've said before ... some people want to talk, some people need to get angry, some people want to write .... I listen to AC/DC!  :)

Susie  :)

Susie what you obviously fail to understand is, that for many people here, Heath, by portraying Ennis in BBM, has changed a LOT of peoples lives for the better and really helped them to understand more about themselves and who they are etc.
So his tragic death has had a really big impact on their lives. I find your comment about "hero worshiping" and putting Heath on a pedestal, and comments about people wanting to throw themselves out of the window, extreemly disrespectful and insensitive. I,m reading between the lines here, so I,m sure you,ll correct me if I,m wrong, but you seem to be suggesting that people should stop crying and being upset, pull themselves together and get on with their lives. I may be wrong, but that,s how I,m reading it.
Obviously your not a very sensitive person, (thats how your coming across to me, so again correct me if I,m wrong), but many people here are, and they are very upset. To them, Heath WAS their hero for the way he helped them in their lives through his portrayal of Ennis. Of course, to his little girl, her daddy will always be her hero.  :'( :'(

Offline MaineWriter

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #93 on: February 01, 2008, 10:57:55 am »
Folks,

We are 10 days on from Heath's death. As I look at messages all over this forum, I can see that we are all in different places with respect to grief, and we are all processing things in different ways. I have read so many statements. Some have made me happy, some have made me sad, some have surprised me, some have dismayed me, and yes, a few have made me angry. I've been a pretty active discussant myself and I have probably made people happy, sad, mad, and everything in between. My point is, we are all human individuals and we are all processing this our own way--and trying to find the best way--so let's just all keep that in mind and try to give everyone some slack.

Back to the topic at hand, RPS. Reading this thread, it is apparent that people have very strong feelings on this topic. That's good. The other thing that I have come to realize is that probably no one person is going to change any other person's mind. That's okay, too. For the record, we have had threads for RPS stories, with links to where they are posted on LJ. These threads have been here since I have taken over as fanfic moderator. I don't anticipate that that will change, ie, they'll be deleted. How active they are depends on how active the readers are and their interest in discussing the story.

Just to clarify: Louise and I have never viewed this board as being a comprehensive listing of all fanfic, RPS and other writing endeavors that exist in the BBM fandom. We've always taken the approach that if an author or reader wants to start a thread to promote a story and discuss it, fine. I guess you could call it a selective reading list that reflects the taste of the Bettermost community. RPS has never been a dominant theme in our threads, but I know some stories have been posted in the past, and can be posted in the future. As I said, I don't anticipate any changes in that regard.

At the same time, I think Heath's death has cast the whole issue of RPS in a new light, which was why this particular thread was started in the first place. What the discussions here have done for me is to help me think through some of these issues, evaluate my own feelings and beliefs, and become more clear in what I think and believe. That's a good thing. So my suggestion to all as we more forward in this discussion: don't try to pitch your comments with a goal of changing someone's mind. That is not likely to happen. Instead, share information, your thoughts, your feelings, so that we can all understand multiple points of view, and use that understanding to enhance our relationships with each other and our community.

Thanks for listening,

Leslie
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Offline Berit

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #94 on: February 01, 2008, 11:23:54 am »
Hi siouxi,
I really must defend Susie a little. I've "known" her since IMDb, maybe 18 months ago and I find her a sweet, sensitive and a very smart grown up woman. I THINK that she means that Heath is a wonderful actor and it's horrible that he is dead BUT he isn't our relative and he isn't Ennis. He portrayed Ennis and the fact that we sometimes mix Heath with Ennis is a result of his good acting skill. Heath doesn't have to be put on a pedestal, he is good as he is. He probably made good and bad decisions in his life, just like you and me. Let's leave it with that and show him the respect of NOT turning him into something that he isn't, a saint. He was a young man of flesh and blood, as it sounds a very nice man ....

As for the disrespectful discussions she mentioned. The masseuse made the decisions she made. It wasn't easy for her. Maybe it was her first dead body. She new what would happen when the press got hold of the story. It is easy for us to shake our head and say that she did wrong. WE WERE NOT THERE.

As for the Olsen twin, what should she have done? Rolled over in ashes?

As for Jake and Heath, we really don't know much about their relationship now. Lets just leave him alone. His grieve is his, not ours. We have nothing to do with that. I say OK to sending him a card, just as I OK to sending one to Michelle. They have reps that sort that kind of mail and if they find it bad timing or inappropriate they sort the cards out....

We all mourn in different ways. But I think that it is good that we discuss the different ways we express our grief. If you threaten to throw your self out of a window when Heath dies, how do you handle the loss of a husband or sibling or parent......

I really don't mean to be disrespectful to you, Siouxi but I find the subject interesting and Susie a very smart and sensitive person.....Maybe I've done things worse, in that case I say I'm sorry. I don't mean to do things worse. Everything I want to say is very clear in my Swedish head but then I have to translate it into English and then I have to spell it...... ::) ...thank God for Spell check!!

I wish you a nice day

Berit

Ennis.....always Ennis.....

Offline souxi

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #95 on: February 01, 2008, 11:35:59 am »
Well it just shows me that you don't know me at all Souxi ... so perhaps we should leave it there.

Susie  :)

And you don,t know me atall either susie, so yes maybe we should.

Offline Berit

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #96 on: February 01, 2008, 11:40:30 am »
Thanks sweetie......"blushing"

You sure know how to make me happy...... :-*

My school English IS improving but the "every day language",......I want to go to the UK...... :D...and afterthat to the Great Country Over There.......

I'll join a lottery ;D

Berit
Ennis.....always Ennis.....

Offline souxi

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #97 on: February 01, 2008, 11:43:36 am »
Berit I,m sure that everything you have said about Susie being a very nice person is true. I have not said she isn,t nice. All I,m saying is that I found her comments disrespectful and insensitive and I stand by that.
You have a nice day too. :)

Offline Berit

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #98 on: February 01, 2008, 11:46:32 am »
Thank you Siouxi!

I do love your "Heath picture". It makes me sad and happy at the same time.....

Berit
Ennis.....always Ennis.....

Offline louisev

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Re: Open Discussion of RPS Stories in Light of Heath's Death
« Reply #99 on: February 01, 2008, 01:35:35 pm »
If discussions of issues are for the purpose of venting our spleen and voicing our thoughts, I think that certainly plenty of that has been done!  Also, I think that it has helped those who are uneasy, or newly-uneasy about RPS, such as myself, because I felt anguished about the fact that I had written an RPS story (though on the "mild" end of the scale) and I had read several.

But seconding what MaineWriter has said, if minds have been changed, they were changed by the tragedy of Heath's sudden death, not by the eloquence of anyone here.

I hope that whatever anger or frustration was generated by the discussion will fade and that we can get along with one another despite our disagreements.  I was not prepared by the media feeding-frenzy over Heath's death - truth to tell, it rather astonished me that it got a red banner Breaking News headline on CNN the day it happened.  The massive press coverage, both mainstream and in the tabloids, has been shocking its comprehensiveness.

And I don't even watch tv! I imagine it is far more intrusive for those who watch television.  What I am trying to say is that whether or not we are ready to leap out windows or whether we were mildly sad, for many people in this forum, Heath was an important symbol for one central reason -- his portrayal of Ennis.  And I think the depth of that portrayal colors the reaction we have all had to his death, mainly because of its unexpectedness.  It is in many ways (for those of us who were his fans) analogous to the death of John Lennon in the life of a Beatles fan, just as sudden and just as disturbing.  However, I do also believe that that tabloid media have deepened the grief by gossip and speculation.

That was not my intent in starting this thread, to cause pain to fans.  It was to allow all opinions regarding RPS stories to be expressed, in light of the tragedy, and there is little room in this fandom, outside of Bettermost, for the dissenting view that it is disrespectful or should be discouraged.
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