Yes, of course, everything is easier said than done, souxi. I totally agree with that. But that doesn't mean it can't, or shouldn't be done.
If I recall correctly, Colson doesn't have an "Earl and Rich" type incident in his past (unless we just haven't heard about it), so I while I sympathize with his fears, I don't put them on the severe childhood trauma level of, for example, Ennis's. I'm not saying his fears aren't genuine and deep, I just don't see him as deeply traumatized in the psychological sense. Besides which, someone has "come to his door," more than once now - and he's survived. He also made a commitment to Ellery, which he seems to have forgotten about (playing house?
)
I also don't lay the blame for how Colson's been behaving on Laura's head. In fact, except for the fact that she is in total denial about Pam beng raped, I think they've both been behaving selfishly. I don't see where Colson has the right to moan about Laura not being able to let go of the past, when he can't either. He can't let go of his fears and she can't let go of her resentment and she has just as much right to be resentful as he does to be fearful. Why are his feelings more valid than hers? They're not - and they're making him act like a jerk.
He tells Laura that he never loved her and never wanted her and has the nerve and insensitivity to ask her why she doesn't have faith in people. He tells Ellery - his husband! - that they've been "playing house" and that he doesn't want to be "pushed." What about Ellery's feelings? What about Ellery's fears? He has them, too! He acts put out about having to sit through dinners with the twins and Wes and Edna - when the Browns are the ones who've been stuck with his girls more than he's been! He didn't ask Pam one word about how her deposition went - as it relates to
her and
her feelings. He didn't ask one little word about a plea deal and how Pam might avoid the trauma of a trial - because he has his own set of blinders on and he's thinking about himself. So if he's going to complain about Laura, maybe he better take a good look in the mirror first because although he believes Pam was raped, I haven't seen hm displaying much concern for that fact lately. Neither Colson nor Laura are pulling themselves together for the sake of their own daughter - and Colson actually believes she was raped! And it hasn't escaped my notice that Colson has a strong support system surrounding him of people who love him and understand, people he can talk openly to - something that Laura doesn't have.
I'm not making excuses for Laura, but those words you said about "old habits" and "easier said than done" apply to her as well as Colson. I love Colson, but I'm disappointed in him right now - and angry with him, too. And I'm very curious about Wes and Edna's reaction to all this.....I know they love Colson, but Ellery is the son the never had, and if someone were treating my son the way Colson is treating Ellery right now, I'd be none too pleased.
Woo Wee, Louise - you've really got me riled!
Marie
