Oh yes, I do think it's about sex... I qualified my little post by saying that in addition to sex... he's also talking about companionship. Sure, the sex is the main aspect of his complaint, but on another, maybe secondary level there's the companionship idea. It's interesting to hear a real, outright and frank discussion of sex coming out of either of them.
Yes of course Amanda, I must have been off with the fairies last night. For some reason I read you saying it
wasn't about sex. Sorry about that, I guess a part of me was looking for friendly disagreement.
Anyway, I watched our boys again last night and it struck me just how much is said in the argument scene that has never been spoken of before. It may have been a "Hello McFly" moment, but I think all the analysis we've been doing came together at that moment: How much of it is about homophobia versus the fear of rejection? How much is it sex versus the need for companionship? Without the argument scene, none of these questions would exist because they are only revealed and explored there. Another thing occurred to me, it's a good thing they picked this time to bring everything out into the open, after all it's the last time that Ennis sees Jack alive.
Anyway, back to loneliness. To me Ennis never really looks lonely until the bus-station/Cassie scene. I'm making a distinction here between "alone" and "lonely" for he is certainly alone before then. But right there you almost want to put him out of his misery, he looks just so sad.
I've just noticed that you've posted again about whether Ennis really had low self-esteme. I'll quickly reply here and come back if I get better ideas. Basically, what you say about being "shy and closed down and reserved and nonconfrontational and a loner and self-conscious" all adds up to a person that is likely to have low self-esteme in my book. But going further, I think self-esteme is intrisically linked to a feeling of worthiness. Beyond all the issues of homophobia and conpanionship, Ennis has resigned himself to his fate because he doesn't believe that being with Jack is possible (for him), and he feels there is nothing that he can do about it so he is disempowered also. He doesn't think he deserves Jack because it is not a relationship he is supposed to have. None of these things on their own necessarily add up to low self-esteme, and maybe it's not even when looked at holistically. Maybe we have assumed this on the basis of: if it looks like a duck and sounds like a duck, it's probably a duck?