Author Topic: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only  (Read 8276 times)

Offline Penthesilea

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TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« on: September 15, 2008, 01:35:12 pm »
Hi BetterMostians :),

after a long time, we have another 'story only' topic for this week.

The motel scene plays a much more important role in the story that it does in the movie. It's four pages of a 28 pages story!

Annie Proulx describes it as „central“. Here are her words from the essay „Getting movied“:

„In the written story the motel scene after a four-year hiatus stood as central. During their few hours in the Motel Siesta, Jack's and Ennis's paths were irrevocably laid out.“


A lot of ground is covered in this four pages long passage.They're both quite chatty, which is especially noteworthy for Ennis.
One thing that stands out to me is for example Jack's narration of his rodeo injuries. I'm still asking myself why it is going into so much details.
To me, it seems like some sort of metaphor. But for what? I have an idea, but will wait for your thoughts before spilling it.

Or Ennis forebearing to ask whose fault it was [the four effin' years without a sign of life]. Combined with his earlier comment of „I didn't know where in the hell you was.[...] Four years. I about give up on you. I figured you was sore about that punch.“ it seems (almost?) as he's accusing Jack for not coming back earlier. As if Jack looking for Ennis was a matter of course. Remarkable when we think about the punch, of which we don't know yet at this point of the story, but of course the boys do.

To me this means he was more or less desperately waiting to hear from Jack. And it sure means he never had given up the hope, he says so himself. I find this pretty telling about Ennis, as well as his ability to express it to Jack.

These are only two examples to get the discussion started. Feel free to agree or disagree, and bring up other details from the (short story's) motel scene.

One note on the TOTW's account: I'll be having house guests and hence there'll be no TOTW next week. And we'll have lots of fun because my guests will be our own Leslie(MaineWriter) and her daughter! Yee-Haw! :D

Now have fun with the motel scene :).




Offline Gabreya

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #1 on: September 15, 2008, 08:13:15 pm »
Nice!!!!!!!!!!!

Offline mariez

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #2 on: September 16, 2008, 10:00:57 am »
Some great ideas to ponder, Chrissi.  Yes, the motel scene is the centerpiece of the ss, but in the movie the greater focus is shifted to the lake scene.   :(

I'll be back when I've had time to gather some thoughts - I do agree about Jack's injuries being a metaphor.  AP wouldn't have gone into such detail without an underlying meaning, I don't think. 

Marie
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline Front-Ranger

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #3 on: September 19, 2008, 07:36:40 pm »
Yes, there's more space given to the Siesta Motel than to Brokeback Mountain!! I like the part where Jack starts his litany of woes with "Got some crushed vertebrates." You bet, Annie. There's crushed vertebrates all over in this story and littering Wyoming and the world! Getting hit by the hammer of life, as AP likes to say.
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Offline shortfiction

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #4 on: September 19, 2008, 08:45:16 pm »
I can see why the screenwriters left out quite a bit of the motel scene; it would have been a bit too long and perhaps too talky for a films.   I still wish they had left in some bits of it, though.
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Offline Front-Ranger

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #5 on: September 19, 2008, 11:48:53 pm »
I can see why the screenwriters left out quite a bit of the motel scene; it would have been a bit too long and perhaps too talky for a films.   I still wish they had left in some bits of it, though.


Well, they did, didn't they? I think the picture of Jake smiling into Heath's ear is one of my favorites.

« Last Edit: September 20, 2008, 12:16:43 pm by Front-Ranger »
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Offline Front-Ranger

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #6 on: September 20, 2008, 12:20:30 pm »
I can see why the screenwriters left out quite a bit of the motel scene; it would have been a bit too long and perhaps too talky for a films.   I still wish they had left in some bits of it, though.


Well, I think Ang could have done it. After all, he did Sense and Senseability, which is Austen, which is mostly talking. But, those characters weren't naked. So if he had done the motel scene as Proulx wrote it, who would be able to pay much attention to what they were saying?!?!?
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Offline BlissC

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #7 on: September 20, 2008, 08:56:38 pm »
Well, I think Ang could have done it. After all, he did Sense and Senseability, which is Austen, which is mostly talking. But, those characters weren't naked. So if he had done the motel scene as Proulx wrote it, who would be able to pay much attention to what they were saying?!?!?

LOL!!! Good point!  ;D

Hmmm...some interesting ideas, and an awful lot to get our teeth into - 4 pages of a 28 page story is quite a sizeable chunk! I'll have to re-read that scene again tomorrow to remind myself of it (I was reading the "Missing Motel Moments" fanfic again yesterday so that's stuck in my head at the moment, and I have a have a tendency to blur the Missing Motel Moments/Pine Creek/Warmest Week of the Year trilogy in with the original SS because they fit in so well with the story).

Hmmmm...motel scene. Happy thought to end the day on.  :)


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Offline BlissC

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #8 on: September 20, 2008, 08:57:12 pm »
Well, they did, didn't they? I think the picture of Jake smiling into Heath's ear is one of my favorites.



Mine too.  :)


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Offline optom3

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #9 on: September 20, 2008, 09:18:53 pm »
I have just been talking of this earlier with Mandy,and I think we decided that Lee possibly thought he had shown about as much sex and intimacy as the American public could watch.

The motel scene in the S.S is full of references to sex,the smell of it etc.What would have been a bit special would have been if more intimate scenes had been filmed, and put together in a special edition DVD that some of us with more open minds would have lapped up.

I also wonder if that is the reason that some of the motel chat is moved to the scene by the campfire,where they are both fully clothed.

I miss seeing some of the post sex talk in the motel scene,it is so natural after sex to lie together,smoke if you do and discuss where and or how things might progress.That is in no way a criticism of the film which will always be my favourite.I think lee had an extraorinarily difficult task,to convey the main themes of the s.s in a way that would be palatable to the greatest number of people.

What I realy miss is when Ennis says "i hate it that you're goin a drive away in the mornin and I'M going back to work" The whole reunion and motel scene in the s.s show us a much more tender Ennis than the film.Yet again though,Lee may have been trying to miss out some elements that many viewers would have found difficult.

I find it very interesting that Ennis says he is goin back to work,rather than going back to Alma.That one sentence conveys such a lot.Whether Ennis realises it or not, he is already linking Jack with love and his personal life, as opposed to his working life.It would be more usual when playing away from home to say,i hate that I am going to have to go back to a,b or c, not work.

Ennis is starting to very definitely pigeon hole aspects of his life.

Offline BlissC

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #10 on: September 21, 2008, 07:15:41 am »
I think the line I noticed first off that was missing from the film was Jack's line in the SS motel scene: "Come on Ennis, you just shot my airplane out a the sky - give me somethin a go on. This ain't no little thing that's happenin here."

I guess having moved a lot of the dialogue of the motel scene to the campfire scene in the film, which of course happened a lot later, that line wouldn't have fitted there, but there's just something about that line in the original motel scene that for me shows right from the motel scene that Jack's well and truly got the dream of the 'sweet life' right from the start. The other thing about the motel scene in the SS, of which that line's the final line after the 'what happens now' part, is that in the SS it's clear from that exchange how they come to be camping straight after - with the film version you jump from the motel to the apartment above the laundromat to the jumping from the cliff into the lake. If you're paying attention (or of course if you've seen the film a zillion times before  :laugh:) obviously you know/can figure out what's going on without the momentary "huh? where did that come from?" feeling.

The other thing I feel with the SS compared with the film version is though that whole chunk of dialogue is shifted to the campfire scene where they're both fully clothed, as Fiona says, the reunion/motel scene in the SS shows a much more tender Ennis, and is a lot more intimate. In the film version, again, unless you're watching closely and reading the 'sub-plot' it's easy to see that scene again as 'just sex.'

I do have a theory on that though, which Fiona's comment about the special edition DVD for those with "more open minds" reminded me of. Just about everyone can relate to sex, even if they don't understand two men having sex; everyone knows it happens. It takes a lot bigger leap of imagination though to understand two men loving each other. Maybe it was partly that there was a feeling that the public would accept the 'just sex' version better, and yet the open-minded would see the sub-plot as well. For example, the "couldn't get here fast enough, red lined it all the way" line, you can read a lot more into than just the words, and one of the hallmarks of the film all the way through is it's subtlety. How it's shown in the film you could read that scene either way. With the SS it's much clearer.  I may be way off base there, but that's just may take on one of the reasons the dialogue from the motel scene got moved to the campfire in the film.

Hmmmm...well considering it's a 'story only' topic, I've managed to go somewhat off-topic!  :laugh: I'll ponder the SS motel scene some more later...


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Offline mariez

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #11 on: September 21, 2008, 02:26:58 pm »
One thing that stands out to me is for example Jack's narration of his rodeo injuries. I'm still asking myself why it is going into so much details.
To me, it seems like some sort of metaphor. But for what? I have an idea, but will wait for your thoughts before spilling it.

Okay, I've had a chance to ponder this a bit. 

Got some crushed vertebrates...-    A "broke back"?  I can also see this as referring to his strength and resolve (backbone) being crushed over time.

And a stress fracture, the arm bone here, you know how bullridin you’re always leverin it off your thigh? — she gives a little ever time you do it. Even if you tape it good you break it a little goddamn bit at a time. Tell you what, hurts like a bitch afterwards.   Foreshadowing about how, little by little, the time they spend apart, and all those long drives up to Wyoming,- the balancing act he tries to play, will all wear on him and hurt a little more each year, even though they "tape it good" when they're together.  "Hurts like a bitch afterwards" - each good-bye they will say over the years?

Had a busted leg. Busted in three places.   Could this be his broken heart?  But I'm not sure about the "three."  Three times?  Hmmm.... when they parted after Brokeback? When Ennis gave the Earl and Rich speech? When he drove up after the divorce?  How about the final lake scene?  Numbers aren't adding up so I'm not sure about that....

Come off the bull and it was a big bull with a lot a drop, he got rid a me in about three flat and he come after me and he was sure faster.   Is Ennis the "big bull" who dropped him with the dirty punch so quickly?  We know that in the ss, Jack is described as a small man and Ennis as tall.  How about OMT coming after him with his belt when Jack was small.  Does Jack feel he "couldn't get it right" with either of them? 

Or Ennis forebearing to ask whose fault it was [the four effin' years without a sign of life]. Combined with his earlier comment of „I didn't know where in the hell you was.[...] Four years. I about give up on you. I figured you was sore about that punch.“ it seems (almost?) as he's accusing Jack for not coming back earlier. As if Jack looking for Ennis was a matter of course. Remarkable when we think about the punch, of which we don't know yet at this point of the story, but of course the boys do.

To me this means he was more or less desperately waiting to hear from Jack. And it sure means he never had given up the hope, he says so himself. I find this pretty telling about Ennis, as well as his ability to express it to Jack.


Agree that Ennis was waiting to hear from Jack.  I don't think he seemed "shocked" to get the postcard - more like relieved.    Makes me think that his "see you around" when they parted was more than just a figure of speech.

Marie
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The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline BlissC

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Re: TOTW 25/08: The Motel Scene - story only
« Reply #12 on: September 24, 2008, 01:55:24 pm »
I agree, Ennis was definitely waiting to hear from Jack ("I didn't know where in the hell you was"), but of course being Ennis he could never come right out and say it, it only comes out in a roundabout way..."Four years. I about give up on you". I think it's quite telling as well that he says "I about give up on you", not that he had given up on Jack, which in itself is an admission of what he feels for Jack. After Jack's description of his rodeoing injuries Ennis's "speech" about what happened after the parted at Aguirre's office is quite startling, because it's one of the few times that Ennis talks openly about how he feels ("...took me about a year to figure out it was that I shouldn't a let you out a my sights")

I get the feeling that though TS1 and TS2 and their time together up on the mountain were obviously special times, that really their relationship started in earnest, or rather that was the first time they both admitted their true feelings (or as close as they were ever going to get to saying it) at the reunion scene - not just the motel scene, because from the kiss on the stairs, through the motel scene, to the camping trip it was gloves off, and in a way a kind of "to hell with the rest of the world" attitude throughout those scenes. Though they talked about not being seen "together" in public, through that entire part of the story they took risks - kissing in the open outside Ennis's apartment (where of course they were seen), booking into a motel room together, and then when they went off on the camping trip, what did they do? They stripped off and jumped into the lake. 

All the way through that part of the story it just feels to me like although they talked about the dangers of being seen together openly in public, the fact that after four years apart and realising this was by no means a one shot thing for either of them there was an undercurrent of "to hell with the rest of the world".


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