Author Topic: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale  (Read 163986 times)

Offline louisev

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost Moderator
  • The BetterMost 10,000 Post Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 16,107
  • "My guns and amo!! Over my cold dead hands!!"
    • Fiction by Louise Van Hine
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #120 on: December 07, 2008, 07:05:35 pm »
Finally, chapter 30.

I really found myself struggling with this chapter, but I really can't explain why.

http://louisev.livejournal.com/283557.html
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline belbbmfan

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost 1000+ Posts Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 3,354
  • A love that will never grow old
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #121 on: December 08, 2008, 12:06:22 pm »
Finally, chapter 30.

I really found myself struggling with this chapter, but I really can't explain why.

http://louisev.livejournal.com/283557.html

Not to worry Louise. At least Colson wasn't struggling!  ;D  :P
'We're supposed to guard the sheep, not eat 'em'

Offline louisev

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost Moderator
  • The BetterMost 10,000 Post Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 16,107
  • "My guns and amo!! Over my cold dead hands!!"
    • Fiction by Louise Van Hine
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #122 on: December 08, 2008, 01:19:44 pm »
Not to worry Louise. At least Colson wasn't struggling!  ;D  :P


hahahahah no he wasn't!
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline mariez

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost 1000+ Posts Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 4,084
  • "you bet"
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #123 on: December 08, 2008, 05:05:03 pm »
Not to worry Louise. At least Colson wasn't struggling!  ;D  :P

LOL.  You can say that again, Fabienne!  Colson certainly is getting into the swing of things!  ;D  Ellery may have a hard time getting him to go back home! 

Marie
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline louisev

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost Moderator
  • The BetterMost 10,000 Post Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 16,107
  • "My guns and amo!! Over my cold dead hands!!"
    • Fiction by Louise Van Hine
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #124 on: December 08, 2008, 06:16:30 pm »
I think I have a better idea of what I was struggling with in this chapter.  I was trying to determine just how much Colson would "let go" and what circumstances would facilitate that letting go, and how that would manifest itself.  It is easy to write about an unchanging character with predictable behavior, and I had some of the same dilemmas in previous situations where Colson would go back and forth about his commitment to Ellery and grappling with being "outed" sometimes a little and sometimes all at once.  One of the guidelines I use for this is the transformation scene from BBM in which Ennis drives up to Lightning Flat and admits to Jack's parents that he was very close to him, effectively outing himself to people who were very close to Jack.

I took that as a sort of guideline that there are situations in which my character would take sudden huge leaps regardless of how much it exposed him because he was in for all or nothing, and would even overcome his own paranoia about his sexuality given the right circumstances.  This is his first real complete separation from "homelike" surroundings after establishing himself in Tourmaline (the trip up north notwithstanding) and so this is the time, if it is ever going to happen, for him to make whatever further strides he is going to make into coming out of the closet.

But it is not easy writing to do.
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline mariez

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost 1000+ Posts Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 4,084
  • "you bet"
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #125 on: December 08, 2008, 08:03:31 pm »
But it is not easy writing to do.

No, I imagine not.  But luckily for us, you never shy away from the hard stuff.  And it makes complete sense to me that being so far away from home and in such a different atmosphere would be a strong impetus for "letting go."  It's been wonderful to watch Colson's realistic (at times poignant, at times funny) evolution.

Thanks,
Marie
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline belbbmfan

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost 1000+ Posts Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 3,354
  • A love that will never grow old
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #126 on: December 09, 2008, 02:51:58 am »
I think I have a better idea of what I was struggling with in this chapter.  I was trying to determine just how much Colson would "let go" and what circumstances would facilitate that letting go, and how that would manifest itself.  It is easy to write about an unchanging character with predictable behavior, and I had some of the same dilemmas in previous situations where Colson would go back and forth about his commitment to Ellery and grappling with being "outed" sometimes a little and sometimes all at once.  One of the guidelines I use for this is the transformation scene from BBM in which Ennis drives up to Lightning Flat and admits to Jack's parents that he was very close to him, effectively outing himself to people who were very close to Jack.

I took that as a sort of guideline that there are situations in which my character would take sudden huge leaps regardless of how much it exposed him because he was in for all or nothing, and would even overcome his own paranoia about his sexuality given the right circumstances.  This is his first real complete separation from "homelike" surroundings after establishing himself in Tourmaline (the trip up north notwithstanding) and so this is the time, if it is ever going to happen, for him to make whatever further strides he is going to make into coming out of the closet.

But it is not easy writing to do.

You know, Louise, when I read this the very first paragraph of this story magnum opus ( :D) came to mind:

As Colson Grey approached the door, putting a deliberate hand on the knob as though gentling a horse about to buck, he stopped, his posture stiffening to an even harder stance, and he took a barely heard breath before he stepped inside.


I really like the 'deliberate' hand in this sentence. In spite of the harder stance and the breath he had to take, he stepped inside anyway. He did it, he let go.
And when Ellery pushes him to go a bit further (okay, the nude beach was A LOT further LOL), he might still harden his stance, but he knows he has to and wants to step inside again. That's a brave thing to do.

You've dealt with this change beautifully Louise.  :)

'We're supposed to guard the sheep, not eat 'em'

Offline louisev

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost Moderator
  • The BetterMost 10,000 Post Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 16,107
  • "My guns and amo!! Over my cold dead hands!!"
    • Fiction by Louise Van Hine
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #127 on: December 09, 2008, 12:41:15 pm »
awwww... yes, that is true, Fabienne, it reminds me that I guess there's a certain consistency from the beginning, and that reassures me that I haven't pushed my poor characters too far!
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline louisev

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost Moderator
  • The BetterMost 10,000 Post Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 16,107
  • "My guns and amo!! Over my cold dead hands!!"
    • Fiction by Louise Van Hine
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #128 on: December 13, 2008, 05:57:26 pm »
I was relieved to find that all of my concern about the consistency of Colson's character seems to have worn off upon rereading.

And here is chapter 31!

http://louisev.livejournal.com/283831.html
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline mariez

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost 1000+ Posts Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 4,084
  • "you bet"
Re: In the Land of the Lotus Eaters: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #129 on: December 14, 2008, 09:58:31 am »
SPOILERS


Yes, and Colson's not the only one who's consistent in his character: 

“Now this looks like a very nice cut a meat, don’t it?”  :laugh: :laugh:

And his exchanges with Sean the waiter and Hollis Grey were vintage Ellery!

I'm sure he won't be feeling "peaked" for long.....

Great stuff.  Thanks, Louise!

Marie
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain