Author Topic: THE PERFORMANCE THREAD aside ((action)) %%thought%% (Read 1705225 times)

Daniel · « **Reply #2240 on:** August 23, 2006, 10:16:37 pm »

YOUNG JACK:

((At the rush of sudden events beyond his control, Jack is nearly in tears. He watches Jimbo get dragged away but dreads the appearance of Bimbo, the sudden direct attack from the singer, and the forcing of the Bull to slave labor in the far side of the bar. Where was that AHA officer when you needed him?))

%% At least I got a last name up front this time. That Bimbo character ain't right for him.%%

((Reluctantly, he turns back towards the barkeeper, silently smirking at him.))

What?

alec716 · « **Reply #2241 on:** August 23, 2006, 10:21:10 pm »

(( Back in the ringside bull pen, a worried EBONY N. IVORY has heard that the top-heavy MICHAEL JACKSON has left the bar. ))

EBONY:

** I hope MICHAEL JACKSON is not coming my way... I heard he is looking for zee-bra to go wit zee dress he is wearing... **

alec716 · « **Reply #2242 on:** August 23, 2006, 11:12:55 pm »

Quote from: alec716 on August 23, 2006, 10:05:38 pm

(( And MICHAEL JACKSON is honored that MRS. TWIST, who just might'a been spying on her son, would leave the bar in a show of solidarity with him. ))

MICHAEL JACKSON:

Why, yes, MRS. TWIST, cherry cake is my favorite! Let's go!

(( MICHAEL JACKSON and MRS. TWIST head off to ... where else... ? ))

MICHAEL JACKSON:

Hey, MRS. TWIST, I want to show you around!

See, this is where I taught SEXY AUDIENCE MEMBER how to wear a boa...

MICHAEL JACKSON:

And this is BILLIE JEAN ...

but she is not my lover.

nakymaton · « **Reply #2243 on:** August 23, 2006, 11:35:19 pm »

BIKER #1:

**You got any idea what the musical entertainment is going to be tonight? Stars & Stripes Forever? Think the piccolo player might have a wardrobe malfunction?**

alec716 · « **Reply #2244 on:** August 23, 2006, 11:51:40 pm »

Quote from: nakymaton on August 23, 2006, 11:35:19 pm

BIKER #1:

**You got any idea what the musical entertainment is going to be tonight? Stars & Stripes Forever? Think the piccolo player might have a wardrobe malfunction?**

(( MICHAEL JACKSON, still tuned in to the Performance Thread from his media room at Neverland, thinks to himself in a girlish and whispery voice... ))

&& Oh I hope so! About the music, I mean. I just love patriotic music! Alll those horns & fifes... &&

Meryl · « **Reply #2245 on:** August 23, 2006, 11:54:51 pm »

Quote from: nakymaton on August 23, 2006, 11:35:19 pm

BIKER #1:

**You got any idea what the musical entertainment is going to be tonight? Stars & Stripes Forever? Think the piccolo player might have a wardrobe malfunction?**

BIKER #2:

** Geez, man, now I know why we're pardners, 'cause you knew jus' what was runnin' through my mind... **

** Hang on, and I'll ask her whut her special talent might be... **

Lumière · « **Reply #2246 on:** August 24, 2006, 12:07:49 am »

((MEANWHILE, BACK AT LUCISE'S TRAILER ...

Lucise steps outside his trailer after a few days of self-imposed seclusion. After the sheep came down from Broken Arsed, he has been having a bit of an identity crisis. So many things have happened to him since he came to this BAM set weeks ago..))

**
Howdy folks! Well, here I am again to launch another product from our Broken Arsed Woolen Ecstacy Line.
I have been working purty hard putting this together over the past few days, so I hope the Marketing team approves.

In case anyone is wondering where I been over the last coupla days, well, I been busy working on this launch, and thinking about a thing or two. I got a letter the other day from my Ma in the ol' country and it looks like she wants me to come home, get married and take over the lil family operation we got goin' back there! Needless to say I am very confused, I don't know what to do .. I have developed..umm, well, strong feelings for someone here, and I don't know how I can just up and leave him..umm, them, here. At the same time, I can't abandon my Ma when she needs me..
I have no idea how to break this to her, or this person, or what the flyin' f--- I oughta do! $:-\$ $:-\$

Ah shit, look at me rambling on and on..my apologies ..umm, well, without much ado, here is our latest BAM Woolen Ecstacy..

**

presents ...

**
I thank you for your time!
**

j.U.d.E. · « **Reply #2247 on:** August 24, 2006, 06:35:59 am »

GNARLS THE BARTENDER

HEY GUYS!! Didn't ANYONE HERE SEE THIS SIGN??! Hunh?! Guess not.. Damn! And s/he sings too.. Where's the karaoke guy gone?..

I'm your bartender today and I make the rules here! So beat it creep!! And - like it or not, but I always look like this..

Is anyone even listening?! And what are you two looking at me? By the way, I have an exquisite choice of beers and Jimbo here you just ordered an ordinary beer?

%% Gosh, people have no taste! %%

Pick one, please! And I mean beer..

And plenty of -

Please you in the back, shut up for a second! And stop giggling and waggling those... ((making weird face with his weird face, sickened by what he sees))

((Turns away in horror, when he sees the crowd in the back not moving and inch out of his bar..))

nakymaton · « **Reply #2248 on:** August 24, 2006, 11:50:12 am »

Quote from: meryl on August 23, 2006, 11:54:51 pm

BIKER #2:

** Geez, man, now I know why we're pardners, 'cause you knew jus' what was runnin' through my mind... **

** Hang on, and I'll ask her whut her special talent might be... **

BIKER #1:

**Glory, glory, hallelujah! I'm gettin swelled up with patriotic feelin just thinkin about it...**

nakymaton · « **Reply #2249 on:** August 24, 2006, 11:53:54 am »

BULL:

((Escapes from Michael Jackson's entourage of small children and sidles up to the bar.))

I'll have a pint of heifer-weizen.

((Looks over at JACK.))

So, you been ridin bulls a lot, cowboy?

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