Author Topic: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale  (Read 52294 times)

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #220 on: May 09, 2009, 05:05:32 pm »
SPOILERS





The fact that Ellery is so strong intellectually and perceptively, but can be so physically and emotionally vulnerable is yet another fascinating aspect of his character that makes him so damn lovable. 

“How can ya stand kissin me, I look like goddamn Alfalfa.”

“I close my eyes. Besides, Alfalfa wasn’t half bad lookin in them little shorts.



that's the way I wrote him.  I remember back during the fandom war, when the most common objection to Ellery as an original love interest for Ennis was that he was a "perfect man" and a "Mary sue", the principle element of Mary Sueism is a character so perfect, so flawless and shining with every conceivable advantage that wins over the hero in a fantasy ending that is basically wish-fulfillment.  Mary Sue's are never disabled, never injured, never miss, and never get a cold.  If they lose their temper it is a noble event and always perfectly justified.  They are always in the right.  So, being somewhat offended at this charge against Ellery, I submitted him to the "Mary Sue Test."

http://www.katfeete.net/writing/marysue.php

The results are here:

Ellery Cantrell is nothing like you. He isn't really very cool: he blends into crowds, he hangs out on the fringes at parties, and wearing shades after dark makes him run into things. There's never been anything special about him that he could see; boy, is he in for a surprise. He's come in for his share of hurt, but gotten off with minor damage. And you've been sparing with the free handouts: whatever he gains, he's worked for.

In general, you care deeply about Ellery Cantrell, but you're smart enough to let him stand on his own, without burdening him with your personal fantasies or propping him up with idealization and over-dramatization. Ellery Cantrell is a healthy character with a promising career ahead of him.

the ranking was 21 on the Mary Sue test - out of a possible 100.  The higher the number, the more of a fantasy-wish fulfillment character it is.  On another test, he came out a 26, which was on the "borderline" area, because being a policeman and a sharpshooter, as well as attractive to those not of his sexual preference, tended to drive up the score.

anyhew... enough about Mary Sues...

Here is chapter 65!

http://louisev.livejournal.com/304890.html

“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline mariez

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #221 on: May 09, 2009, 07:38:35 pm »
Well, thankfully, I missed a good bit of all that nonsense, but the idea of Ellery as a "perfect man" is so laughable, that charge could only be made by someone who doesn't understand him at all, imo.  I've heard of "Mary Sues" of course, but I had no idea there was a "Mary Sue Test"!!!  I can see how a novice writer (which you obviously are not) could fall into the Mary Sue trap.

SPOILERS





Good, honest conversation between two more no-bullshit kind of guys. 

I’ll go see Bates. I’m the sheriff, after all, an if he’s gonna give anybody the real story, it’ll be me.” Wes had hitched up his belt. “I am too old ta be doin this, but sometimes ya just got ta get in the saddle an ride, Joe.”

This is where years of experience - and the power and authority that come with a sheriff's badge - are priceless.  Luckily, Wesley Brown has them all, along with a fierce desire to get to the truth. 

LOL at Jeremy being punished by having to work wtih Reynolds!  And I'm looking forward to seeing Wes handling Bates and watching Joe take his licks!  Thanks, Louise.
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #222 on: May 09, 2009, 11:30:48 pm »
Yep, the Sheriff has to get in the saddle and ride this time, while rookie Dupree heads out to stem the tide of violence in South Tourmaline!  This story promises to be quite a bit longer than my recent ones, and I really did not expect it to get this complicated... but you know me, I can't live a crime scene alone.
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #223 on: May 10, 2009, 05:18:26 pm »
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline mariez

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #224 on: May 11, 2009, 12:40:33 pm »
and here is chapter 66!!

http://louisev.livejournal.com/304985.html

SPOILERS




It's the milquetoasts like Bates that enable the Featherstones and the Lagos of the world to keep running unchecked, all the while convincing themselves that they're not responsible in any way. 

Bates held a hand up. “Look. Whatever happened on that case I got nothin ta do with. Randy told me keep yer head down an that is what I did. You know Randy.”

And that's what he did.  Ugh.  At least Wes got a lead.  Wonder who and what that old phone book contains.  Thanks, Louise!
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #225 on: May 11, 2009, 10:09:56 pm »
and now more mumble mumble police procedure!

http://louisev.livejournal.com/305270.html

winces while I wait for Madame Prosecutor to tell me I misread the Arizona witness arrest procedure wrong...!
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline mariez

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #226 on: May 12, 2009, 01:14:51 pm »
and now more mumble mumble police procedure!

http://louisev.livejournal.com/305270.html

winces while I wait for Madame Prosecutor to tell me I misread the Arizona witness arrest procedure wrong...!

SPOILERS



It all sounds kosher to me!  I understand why Paula suggested they try to get the witnesses without force and only use the warrants if they had to, but I imagine Jeremy will make sure someone keeps an eye on them if he does have to go back for the warrants, even though there's "Too much work, not enough detectives.”

I found Paula's attitude toward Jeremy interesting.  I guess she could just be cranky about being called in to work on a Saturday morning, and it was clear she wasn't gung ho on the warrants, but now I'm wondering how the rest of her evening with Henry went.   :-\  It seemed like they were headed in the right direction when we last saw them and now I'm really curious as to how they ended the evening once they got past the business part!

In any event, things are sure hopping at the sheriff's department this morning, and I loved the dialogue, as usual.  Poor "Don’t you dare call me Sheriff" Joe - he must feel like one of those guys who has to keep all the plates spinning!  And how in the world did anyone get anything done before e-mail and cell phones?   :laugh:  Thanks, Louise!
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #227 on: May 12, 2009, 01:47:16 pm »
SPOILERS



It all sounds kosher to me!  I understand why Paula suggested they try to get the witnesses without force and only use the warrants if they had to, but I imagine Jeremy will make sure someone keeps an eye on them if he does have to go back for the warrants, even though there's "Too much work, not enough detectives.”

I found Paula's attitude toward Jeremy interesting.  I guess she could just be cranky about being called in to work on a Saturday morning, and it was clear she wasn't gung ho on the warrants, but now I'm wondering how the rest of her evening with Henry went.   :-\  It seemed like they were headed in the right direction when we last saw them and now I'm really curious as to how they ended the evening once they got past the business part!

In any event, things are sure hopping at the sheriff's department this morning, and I loved the dialogue, as usual.  Poor "Don’t you dare call me Sheriff" Joe - he must feel like one of those guys who has to keep all the plates spinning!  And how in the world did anyone get anything done before e-mail and cell phones?   :laugh:  Thanks, Louise!

they got it done with TWXses!  I remember back when I did temporary office work, I was always running out to send TWXses.  Which at some indefinite time in the mid 1980's gave way to FAXES.  There were also SECURE TWX, which I have no idea what that entailed, just that a code had to be put in before they got sent.
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline mariez

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #228 on: May 12, 2009, 02:33:44 pm »
they got it done with TWXses!  I remember back when I did temporary office work, I was always running out to send TWXses.  Which at some indefinite time in the mid 1980's gave way to FAXES.  There were also SECURE TWX, which I have no idea what that entailed, just that a code had to be put in before they got sent.

I remember the early FAX machines! Thermal paper on rolls and the printing was usually kind of blurred. 
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #229 on: May 12, 2009, 10:23:11 pm »
I remember the early FAX machines! Thermal paper on rolls and the printing was usually kind of blurred. 

they sure were blurry!!!!

And now, chapter 67!

http://louisev.livejournal.com/305601.html
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”