I miss you on weekends

[Lumière]

Howdy Phoenix!

Best of luck at the new school. 

I haven't seen Mulholland Drive yet.  Will check it out sometime.


Take good care,
~M

[Lumière]

Howdy Phoenix!

Haven't seen you around here for a dog's age! 
Hope you are doing well!
Drop a line sometime, why don't ya..

Cheers,
~M

[notBastet]

in a nut shell


-my internet was turned off (i'm at the library)

- we still don't have our own house

-I'm not talking to Bill, but i found some shit out, and i feel sorry for him

-i'm a believer in God now. He's help me get strength to go through (as there's no way but through)

-i've been praying/meditating, and i'll continue to do so

-i'm starting a new school, and i'm looking foward to it.

-i'm still a little sore. Is there anyone out there that is still sore from their first major infatuation

Hi,

I have just been reading through your blog... not sure if you're still checking in every so often or not.  (I know I have periods when I am online a lot, and then sometimes, not at all.)   Just wanted to answer your question with a resounding "Yes!"  Not having a strong personal life myself, I try to avoid giving any real love life advice, but I think sometimes there are hurts that never go away, just like there are loves that never go away.  What you have to do, in order to survive, if finds ways to live with (or without) those loves/hurts.  'course there are healthy and unhealthy ways to get over/through things.  I would say it took me probably at least three to four years to really, truly move past my first love (and it was a guy I was involved with my senior year of high school).  Now, those three to four years weren't full of misery, but there was certainly a lot of questioning and sorting out - both my love life, and the rest of my life, in general, and there were bouts of misery, but also bouts of happiness too.

Anyhoo - hope you are well,
nB

[Br. Patrick]

Howdy Phoenix!

Haven't seen you around here for a dog's age! 
Hope you are doing well!
Drop a line sometime, why don't ya..

Cheers,
~M

I just wanted to add "me too" to Milli~!  Have been missing your struggle and hope that things are better now.

PS Isn't Milli's Billie Holiday Sig GREAT~!

[RebelWithASmile]

heyyyyyyy


i'm sorry its been so long!

i've just been kinda ugh


well, i've been just thinking a lot, thats been my life.


i haven't hung out with many people outside of school. The people here are very....shallow, and very NOT ME. 

i hate the people here, but i like the school. I've accepted that i wont make any real good friends here like i did at my own school - i'm not being pessimistic, i'm being honest. Its been a while. I've really seen nothing.

I've been very confused about my sexuality, and who i'm actually attracted to, and its odd. I like this guy named Dave in my Psychology, but he's straight...and he's really been trying hard not to get close to me. I think its obvious.

I'm not myself anymore

my life consist of watching movies, i've been watching classic movies such as Sunset Boulevard (which is great) and Bonnie & Clyde (which is awesome).

any recommendations?

i've tried, really, and i'm not being hopeless, just accepting...

people here ridicule me and single me out sometimes...i just attack back. I have some awesome classes like psychology/astronomy/media/honor's English but i feel so alone sometimes...

i want a companion, or someone to obsess over. And yes, my mind does go back to Bill everyday. Well, he hasn't been completely out of my life, its shit how cell phones can connect people so far away from each other.


OH WELL!

i entered a poem contest, but my poem is rather odd. Last years winner wrote like she was trying to be an adult, and mine is very youth (well its a YOUTH CONTEST!!!!)

i won't win

here it is, please read, and tell me what you think and what you think its about!!!


Self

The man with
The smooth mountain range
Is caressing songs on the lonely plain

He died today, I am afraid
A sense of needing,
No one gave
Clenched my soul,
Now plus one,
Together, whole
No matter what was done

At last, the clouds open,
But the rain is not sour,
It's sweet, it's lovely,
In this blissful hour

For one that's dead cannot defy-
One that's dead cannot deny

Earth Shine on the desert moon!
Stoking Pillows on a silver spoon!

Thus the truth came a little late
To save my statue from my fate

Rest forever
He will, in my hold
Singing songs for us-
We will never grow old



---
that's all i can think of right now

[injest]

hi Pheonix!!

good to see you here again. Good to see you are still writing poetry.

It is ok to be confused, it is a hard thing to settle in your mind. Just remember you are still young and have a lot of life ahead of you. These are not near the best years of your life. You don't have to make any decisions right now, just feel what you feel and see where it takes you.

 

I liked your poem but I am not good at interpreting poetry. I have to have stuff spelled out for me!

[Kelda]

Hi Pheonix - I notice its your birthday a day after mine - happy 18th birthday fro Tuesday - if you were in the UK you could have a whiskey to toast Ennis and Jack! 

[Lumière]

Greetings Phoenix, 

Good to see you here again.
Love the poetry - great to see that you are still writing..

Do I read something about a birthday on the 18th?
Sending you (early)  Happy Birthday wishes!

Be well,
~M

[Shakesthecoffecan]

Well Pheonix I like your poem well enough to put it on the refrigerator.

Your senior year is half over now, I am sorry things are not working out for you at your new school, but be patient, the world is about to open up for you. Wide open, and you are going to do well.

As for movies I would suggest: North by Northwest, Nobody's Fool, Latter Days, Harold and Maude, The King of Hearts, The Misfits, and anthing else with Marilyn Monroe in it.

Peyton Place, you have to see that one! 

[RebelWithASmile]

haha, thank you all!!!!


yes, happy 18!

but i was held back in 5th grade, so i'm in my junior year

lol! Thats funny, and thanks for the support on poetry...when i have more time i will give AN explanation to it...well, kind of. I don't want to ruin it at all by labelling it a poem of need

i've tried to not worry about my sexuality or what people think.


But i did find this awesome girl shirt that says "I'm not fat, i'm knocked up"


HAHAHA! I want it...everyone in my English class made fun but the teacher. Perhaps i walked into that one. He's a hot teacher too. I had a dream he came out of the closet 

but he's getting married in a year...but is it to a woman? lol!

ive heard of North by Northwest! I love Hitchcock. Vertigo was so good.

i also love Marilyn Monroe, Some Like it Hot is hilarious.

thanks for the recommendations