Jack is a complicated character and, with the exception of the scene where he confronts his father-in-law, his character development later in the film seems uneven and his hold on Ennis less tenable, perhaps because Lee leaves so much to be said in the silences. We see him going to Mexico to cruise for sex, but we do not see him unguarded with his parents, Ennis or even with wife Lureen (Anne Hathaway) to give us the understanding that we get from Ennis' scenes with his wife (Michelle Williams) and their daughters.
I suppose I would have liked to see more, much much more, of both Jack's and Ennis's lives. Certainly Jack with his parents, Jack and Lureen with their friends (for I cannot imagine that they did not have some sort of regular social life, with their affluence and position in the local community)....... I also would have liked to see more of Ennis with his family. That is, his brother and sister and their spouses and offspring and so forth... I imagine they must have kept in some kind of contact. I'd certainly have liked to see more of Jack and Lureen too. But I do think we do get to witness quite a lot of their married life, - the development in their relationship over the years and their relationship with their son is illustrated well through the scenes we do get to see, IMO.
But however much I'd personally have loved to see hours upon untold hours of Ennis and Jack with others, and certainly with each other, I completely trust Ang Lee. I trust him in that I bellieve he's showing us the events that are required and important in making Ennis and Jack the people they are, the events, small and large, that form and develop them and their relationship and their lives, the events that serve to characterize the trend in their development as human beings over the years..... the events that complete them as real people. Which also means leaving a fair amount of ambiguity in, never making grand sweeping one-dimansional statements about them through the scenes we get to see - because that is not how real persons are....
Sometimes these are seemingly insignificant events, sometimes it's no more than a glance or a single word, or a shimmering teardrop....... but still I completely believe that they are the scenes we do *need* to form a deep and real understanding of the characters Ennis and Jack; - while more conventionally "big events" like for instance Jack's and Lureen's wedding, the actual birth of both the guys' children, family get-togethers, etc. etc. are by and large passed by. We know they happened, we can infer they didn't mean as much as the big and small scenes we do get to see. The emotional impact is not based on the outward-seeming significance.
Parents should know that the movie deals with mature issues, including bigotry, homosexuality, and adultery. There is nudity, sex between committed couples, adultery, references to prostitution. Characters use frequent profanity, they drink and smoke, in one scene they use drugs. Characters drink to excess, they get violent, and they brawl. There is the frequent threat of brutality and a brief scene of a bloody murder. A character gives an explicit account of torture and murder. There are angry and violent fight scenes between couples.
I think BBM is unique in that it conveys a sense of tranquility, of deep calm, to me - despite (or maybe because of) the strong sense of loss, grief and tragedy that slowly emerges over its narrative. It's strange to see such a summary as the quote above. I can connect each statement she makes with a scene in the film, but still the sum total of that paragraph gives the exact opposite impression of how the film comes across to me......