Most annoying/least favorite holiday songs

[Jeff Wrangler]

Time to bump this thread, because I've just written elsewhere that the music of Carol of the Bells drives me batty. 

[CellarDweller]

Same as usual for me.

Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer,  Dominic The Donkey, and The Christmas Shoes.

[serious crayons]

As I just wrote elsewhere, Dean Martins' "Marshmallow World" is the worst. I don't know if it's even a Christmas song, but it's always played among Christmas songs on retailers' Muzaks.

Same as usual for me.

Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer,  Dominic The Donkey, and The Christmas Shoes.

"Grandma GROBAR" is pretty bad, too. The other two I don't know, but they don't sound like songs I'd like.


The other day I realized I feel slightly sorry for "Baby, It's Cold Outside." I am willing to believe the original writers and performers meant the song in all sincerity as a harmless flirtatious little ditty.

Unfortunately it now reads like a dialogue between Harvey Weinstein and an aspiring young actress.



 

[CellarDweller]

"Grandma GROBAR" is pretty bad, too. The other two I don't know, but they don't sound like songs I'd like.

"Dominick the Donkey" is a Christmas song written by Ray Allen, Sam Saltzberg and Wandra Merrell, and was recorded by Lou Monte in 1960, on Roulette Records. The song describes a donkey who helps Santa Claus bring presents ("made in Brooklyn") to children in Italy "because the reindeer cannot climb" Italy's hills. The song was re-released onto Amazon on September 26, 2011, on Dexterity Records.  The spelling of "Dominick" was modified to "Dominic" for the re-release. It was included in Volume 2 of the Ultimate Christmas Album series produced by Collectables Records and on the Christmas compilation album Merry Xmas 2011 by Cinquenta Musica.

The song was listed at No. 14 in Billboard's "Bubbling under the Hot 100" list in December 1960.  Santa Claus owning a donkey is later referenced in the 1977 television special Nestor, the Long–Eared Christmas Donkey. In that special, the donkey's name is "Spieltote," who is voiced by Roger Miller and who is the narrator.

"The Christmas Shoes" is a Christmas-themed song by the Christian vocal group NewSong. The song was released through Benson Records as a bonus track on their 2000 album Sheltering Tree, at the urging of St. Louis and syndicated radio personality DC (of Steve & DC). DC also co-wrote and co-produced the hit single in the Summer of 2000.  It reached No. 31 on the Billboard Hot Country Songs chart.  "The Christmas Shoes" spent one week at No. 1 on the Adult Contemporary chart and No. 42 on the Hot 100 chart.   It was written by NewSong group members Eddie Carswell and Leonard Ahlstrom, and radio personality Isaiah "D.C." Daniel.

The song recounts the events experienced by a narrator completing the last of his gift-shopping on Christmas Eve. He is waiting in the checkout line behind a young boy who wants to buy a pair of shoes for his terminally-ill mother: she will die soon and he wants her to appear beautiful when she meets Jesus. He is short on money and the narrator ends up paying for the shoes, which reminds him of the true meaning of Christmas.

[southendmd]

The other day I realized I feel slightly sorry for "Baby, It's Cold Outside." I am willing to believe the original writers and performers meant the song in all sincerity as a harmless flirtatious little ditty.

Unfortunately it now reads like a dialogue between Harvey Weinstein and an aspiring young actress.

I'm with you.  The song has an interesting history.  Per wiki:

"During the 1940s, whenever Hollywood celebrities with vocal talents attended parties, they were expected to perform songs. In 1944, Loesser wrote "Baby, It's Cold Outside" to sing with his wife, Lynn Garland, at their housewarming party in New York City at the Navarro Hotel. They sang the song to indicate to guests that it was time to leave. Garland has written that after the first performance, "We became instant parlor room stars. We got invited to all the best parties for years on the basis of 'Baby.' It was our ticket to caviar and truffles. Parties were built around our being the closing act." In 1948, after years of performing the song, Loesser sold it to MGM for the 1949 romantic comedy Neptune's Daughter. Garland was furious: "I felt as betrayed as if I'd caught him in bed with another woman." The song won the 1949 Academy Award for Best Original Song."

Here it is, in context from "Neptune's Daughter" with Esther Williams and Ricardo Montalban.  Judge for yourself.  I especially love the reprise:  the gender roles are switched in a great comic turn by Red Skelton and Betty Garrett.

[CellarDweller]

There are now 'sanitized" versions of this song.  I prefer the original.

[serious crayons]

She didn't even watch him pour the drinks! As the lyrics imply, hers is probably roofied.
 

There are now 'sanitized" versions of this song.  I prefer the original.

What -- you prefer

I simply must go (Baby it's cold outside)
The answer is no (But baby it's cold outside)
The welcome has been (How lucky that you dropped in)
So nice and warm (Look out the window at that storm)

to the ultraromantic

I simply must go (and I respect your decision; can I call you a Lyft?)
The answer is no (And I realize no means no, so I won't push it any further)
This welcome has been (Enjoyable -- now have a good night)
So nice and warm (Look out the window -- the Lyft is here.)

I prefer that one to

So really I'd better scurry (Beautiful please don't hurry)
OK, that's it -- hand me my phone; I'm tweeting Ronan Farrow.


Actually, I made those up. But I have seen the sanitized versions you're talking about and agree they're lacking.

This one isn't offensive, though I'm not sure I see the point in doing it:

[serious crayons]

Turns out "Carol of the Bells" has a long and complex history. It started out as a Czech song about New Year's Eve and no reference to bells.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shchedryk_(song)


http://slate.com/news-and-politics/2019/12/carol-bells-shchedryk-ukraine-leontovych.html

[Front-Ranger]

Am I getting too PC? I was listening to "Sleigh Ride" and the constant cracking of the whip really bothered me.

"Just hear those sleigh bells jingling, ring-ting-tingling, too
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you
Outside, the snow is falling, and friends are calling, "yoo-hoo!"
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you
Giddy-yap, giddy-yap, giddy-yap, let's go
Let's look at the show
We're riding in a wonderland of snow
Giddy-yap, giddy-yap, giddy-yap
It's grand just holding your hand
We're gliding along with a song of a wintery fairyland
Our cheeks are nice and rosy, and comfy-cozy are we
We're snuggled up together like two birds of a feather would be
Let's take that road before us and sing a chorus or two
Come on, it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you
There's a birthday party at the home of…"

[serious crayons]

I don't find this annoying so much as startling. I came across it for the first time the other night and thought, is there anyone you'd consider less likely to record a Christmas song? The version I watched had written lyrics, and I was startled to hear they were kind of sexist. I don't think of Keith Richards as particularly sexist. But then I discovered there are a number of videos with this recording, and that the song is originally by Chuck Berry, which explains both the sexism and the fact that Keith, a lifelong Chuck Berry fan, would choose to record it.

One thing about a Christmas song is that it can bring years of royalties. Which may not be a big factor for Keith, but might have been for Chuck.