Author Topic: Kerry's Komedy Klub  (Read 1202549 times)

Offline dot-matrix

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #450 on: May 27, 2007, 12:47:36 am »
An old couple are taking a trip down memory lane and as such have gone for a holiday back to the place where they first met.

While sitting at a cafe the little old man says "remember the first time I met you over 50 years ago? We left this cafe, went round the corner behind the gas works and I gave you one from behind". "Why yes I remember it well dear." Replies the little old lady with a grin. "Well for old times sake, lets go there again and i`ll give you one from behind.

The two old pensioners pay their bill and leave the cafe. A young man sitting next to them has overheard the conversation and smiles to himself, thinking it would be quite amusing seeing two old pensioners at it. He gets up and follows them.

Sure enough he sees the them near the gas works. The little old lady pulls off her knickers and lifts up her dress. The old man pulls down his pants and grabs the lady`s hips and the little old lady then leans forward and grabs the fence for support.

Well, what follows is 40 minutes of the most athletic sex the man has ever seen. The little old man is banging away at the little old lady at a pace that can only be described as phenomenal. Limbs are flying everywhere, the movement is a blur and they do not stop for a single second.

Finally they collapse and don't move for an hour.

The young man is stunned. Never in his life has he ever seen anything that equates to this, not in the movies, not from his friends, not from his own experiences.

Reflecting on what he has just seen, he says to himself, "I have to know his secret. If only I could shag like that now, let alone in fifty years time! The old couple by this time have recovered and dressed themselves. Plucking up courage the man approaches. 

He says "Sir, in all my life I have never seen anybody shag like that, particularly at your age. What's your secret? Could you shag like that fifty years ago?

The old fellow replies " Son, fifty years ago that fucking fence wasn`t electrified.

Life is not a dress rehearsal

injest

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #451 on: May 27, 2007, 01:34:22 am »
hey, Kerry,

David told me to post this here! (HE thinks it is CUTE!!)




crazy isnt he??

Offline David In Indy

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #452 on: May 27, 2007, 01:40:17 am »
hey, Kerry,

David told me to post this here! (HE thinks it is CUTE!!)




crazy isnt he??

She LYIN', she LYIN', her mama said she's LYIN!!!

I said it was disgusting! 

 >:(  >:(

And it is!!  :P
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injest

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #453 on: May 27, 2007, 01:47:19 am »
YOU lie!

You said it was cute, you wish you had one AND!! that you wish you could eat some of that bacon!

(you even said YUM!)

Offline David In Indy

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #454 on: May 27, 2007, 01:50:38 am »
YOU lie!

You said it was cute, you wish you had one AND!! that you wish you could eat some of that bacon!

(you even said YUM!)

What's your doctor's number? I'm calling him tomorrow. You need your medications changed!  >:(

You've gone delusional on us Jess!
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injest

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #455 on: May 27, 2007, 02:01:45 am »
What's your doctor's number? I'm calling him tomorrow. You need your medications changed!  >:(

You've gone delusional on us Jess!

*singsong voice*

I'm rubber!

YOU'RE glue!

Everything YOU say bounces off me!

and sticks to YOU!!

 :P :P

Offline Kerry

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #456 on: May 27, 2007, 03:13:38 am »
hey, Kerry,

David told me to post this here! (HE thinks it is CUTE!!)




crazy isnt he??

OK, now you've reeeeally got me curious.  ???

I can see that the name of the pic is "hogzilla" and that it makes David wanna eat bacon.  :o

Trouble is, all I can see is a little white square with a red cross in it!  :-\

Which is what's making me very, very curious, indeed!  ???

Moving right along, here's a cute roadsign that I found on the Net. The original poster claims she saw it in Indiana. If that's the case, could our resident Indianan kindly explain to this humble Aussie what on earth it means? Over to you, David!    ;D

« Last Edit: May 27, 2007, 03:20:41 am by Kerry »
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injest

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #457 on: May 27, 2007, 03:19:22 am »
OK, now you've reeeeally got me curious.  ???

I can see that the name of the pic is "hogzilla" and that it makes David wanna eat bacon.  :o

Trouble is, all I can see is a little white square with a red box in it!  :-\

Which is what's making me very, very curious, indeed!  ???

Moving right along, here's a cute roadsign that I found on the Net. The original poster claims she saw it in Indiana. If that's the case, could our resident Indianan kindly explain to this humble Aussie what on earth it means? Over to you, David!    ;D


go to this link...I can see it wonder why you can't?  ???

anyway!! (it is worth looking at!!  :o )

http://bumpshack.com/2007/05/25/1051-pound-boar-killed-by-11-year-old/

Offline David In Indy

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #458 on: May 27, 2007, 03:33:36 am »
OK, now you've reeeeally got me curious.  ???

I can see that the name of the pic is "hogzilla" and that it makes David wanna eat bacon.  :o

Trouble is, all I can see is a little white square with a red cross in it!  :-\

Which is what's making me very, very curious, indeed!  ???

Moving right along, here's a cute roadsign that I found on the Net. The original poster claims she saw it in Indiana. If that's the case, could our resident Indianan kindly explain to this humble Aussie what on earth it means? Over to you, David!    ;D

What? Just because I live here, you want me to translate the signs for you Kerry!

I guess it means if there's an animal up ahead they'll flash the sign for us!  :laugh:  :laugh:

They print a whole different driver's manual for Indiana, just because of our signs! Okay, I'm exaggerating. But I did see one the other day that read "Warning: Deer Crossing" and it was on Meridian Street in downtown Indianapolis! I guess that goes to show you just how country we are here!

Okay, I lied. I didn't really see it. I'm tired! Me and Alex are going to bed!

You got me all confused Kerry! Shame on you!  >:(

 :laugh:  :laugh:
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Offline Kerry

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #459 on: May 27, 2007, 03:33:47 am »
go to this link...I can see it wonder why you can't?  ???

anyway!! (it is worth looking at!!  :o )

http://bumpshack.com/2007/05/25/1051-pound-boar-killed-by-11-year-old/


Ugh! Yucky-Poo!  :o

That IS indeed disgusting! Thank you so much for posting it, Jess (NOT!)  :(   ;)

Which one of the two fat pigs in that pic do you find most disgusting, David?   ???

It's enough to put one off bacon for life!  :-\

Excuse me while I rush off and have a technicolour yawn! (that's Australian for "barf"!)  :(   ;)   :laugh:
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