I am reading through all of these notes and I am probably one of those dissenting from the majority. I know we have gone round and round about this … so I doubt that I will change anyone’s mind. But, I am still going to reiterate my point (in regards to Ennis acknowledging that he is gay). IMO, Ennis does not acknowledge this until the lake scene when, at that moment, he realizes this “thing” he feels for Jack is love. Before that, Ennis did not see himself as gay and certainly not “queer.” I don’t know that he ever labeled himself as “queer.” (NOTE: I am not saying that he didn’t know he loved Jack. What I am saying is that he could not label the intensity of his feelings as “love.”)
Let’s look at this from a psychological standpoint:
1. Ennis was nine, a very impressionable age, when his father made him look at a beaten and dismembered man who was murdered because he was gay.
2. Ennis suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder …. the definition being:
· a type of anxiety problem. It can develop after your life is threatened, or after you experience or see a traumatic event. Usually, the event makes you feel very afraid or helpless.
· Symptoms include:
· flashbacks, nightmares, or frightening thoughts, especially when exposed to anything reminiscent of the traumatic event,
· increased consciousness of one’s own mortality,
· avoidance of reminders of the event
· flight/fight syndrome,
· outbursts of anger,
· hyper- vigilance and alertness to possible danger,
· increased startle reaction re-experiencing the traumatic event,
· feelings of guilt,
· failed relationships/divorce,
· severe depression, anxiety disorders or phobias,
· employment problems.
3. If not treated, this condition can last for years.
Symptomatically, PTSD describes Ennis to a tee. It is important to understand this because it lays the foundation for everything Ennis is … how he sees himself, how he sees the world, how he reacts to situations, etc. (as an additional note …. Ennis was not, IMO, a responsible person. He quit as many jobs as he could and was unable to support his family. It wasn’t until he was forced to pay child support when he began holding down jobs).
Now, let’s move on to the acknowledgement of Ennis’ sexuality. Ennis was taught that homosexuality was a bad thing. He was taught to hate his feelings … i.e. deny any feelings of attraction towards the same sex. This is where “defense conformity” comes into play. This can be described as follows:
· The conformity to norms is often quite unconscious. It has been internalized (learned well), probably in early childhood. Our societal norms are seldom doubted; rather, we take them as givens, as "the way things are." The learning is supported throughout life by the "validity" of the norm -- i.e. it works because it is the norm. But most of what is called conformity concerns something "somewhat conscious" and "not quite voluntary." It is usually brought on by social anxiety and fear
Often the argument is made that Ennis acknowledged he was gay because he certainly was enjoying their sexual relationship on BBM. But, one cannot compare the life on BBM with the life post mountain. BBM was free of societal norms and expectations. Ennis’ fears were suspended because he had no external pressures. There was another thread that talked about the “punch” Ennis gave Jack. The more I think about it, the more I see the “punch” as a way for Ennis to (attempt) to divorce his feelings towards Jack.
The last piece to this puzzle is Ennis’ denial. We know that 1) Ennis suffers from PTSD and 2) conforms to societal expectations out of fear. Denial is described as:
Denial is a psychological defense mechanism in which a person faced with a fact that is uncomfortable or painful to accept rejects it instead, insisting that it is not true despite what may be overwhelming evidence. The subject may deny the reality of the unpleasant fact altogether (simple denial), admit the fact but deny its seriousness (minimisation) or admit both the fact and seriousness but deny responsibility (transference).
This describes Ennis, too. His internal dialogue rejects any thought that he might be gay. Is this logical? No. But denial
isn’t logical. We can look at Ennis and think it is obvious that he is gay. But just because he says certain things like, “ …she don’t ever suspect?” does not mean he is acknowledging that he is gay.
There is a well known phenomenon of married men who want to have sex with other men. One of their requirements is that the other man is not gay. They usually try to hook up with other married men. We look at that and say, “what??” But their view of “gay” or “queer” is not the sexual act. It is a lifestyle.
The psychology of Ennis (or any human being) is not cut and dry. It is not always logical. As I look at Ennis, I see a very complex person who has experienced a lot of tragedy and pain in his life. So, what may seem illogical to us, really makes a lot of sense to Ennis’ way of thinking.