Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > IMDb Remarkable Writings Rewound
"Brokeback Fever Pitch," "I 'Cowbot", and other sequels....
TOoP/Bruce:
by - bjblakeslee (Thu Apr 27 2006 14:06:33 )
"Jesusaurus Park"
PLOT SYNOPSIS:
Ennis and Jack find romance on the mountain, but the mountain is not what it seems. Joe Aguirre is experimenting with DNA recovery from prehistoric fossils and injecting the DNA into rose stem cells rescued from fertility clinics in Wyoming. The experiment goes horribly wrong when DNA from a velociraptor is accidently injected into host cells from Pat Robertson and a clueless Anita Bryant is chosen to be the surrogate mother. This unholy union chooses to liberate itself from its uterine constraints by performing its own style of C-section. Jack and Ennis fall to their knees and try to pray, but alas, God is now the proprietary intellectual property of the Republican party.
Now a fully grown, fire-breathing Jesusaurus Rex (Americanus Talibanus Republica), the relentless monster not only spews homophobic vitriol, but also shows absolutely no regard for environmental impact, and promotes its heterosexist agenda by offering a series of socially irresponsible tax cuts.
Ennis and Jack narrowly escape, but not before the Jesusaurus escapes the mountain and heads east to Washington, D.C.
TOoP/Bruce:
by - bjblakeslee (Thu Apr 27 2006 14:08:14 )
"Meet the Flockers"
PLOT SYNOPSIS:
Ennis decides to marry Jack in an legally non-binding Wyoming civil commitment ceremony, but he must first convince his brother and sister (Dustin Hoffman and Barbara Steisand) to give their blessings in order to inherit the 24 dollars their dad left for him before missing that fateful curve in the road.
TOoP/Bruce:
by - bjblakeslee (Thu Apr 27 2006 14:11:30 )
UPDATED Mon May 8 2006 06:12:44
"The Lords of Brokeback"(The Lords of Dogtown)
PLOT SYNOPSIS:
Jack and Ennis (newly arrived from Venice Beach) are hired to keep watch over a large flock of CG sheep in the foothills of Brokeback Mountain. They ride horses, and sleep together in a tent.
Eventually, both decide that man does not live for sex alone, and taste the mind-blowing euphoria of alcohol enhanced mountain snowboarding. (2006 olympic medal skunker Bodie Miller guest stars as the Basque shepherd who puts the boys on to their special alcohol and testosterone charged purpose!)
TOoP/Bruce:
by - bjblakeslee (Thu Apr 27 2006 14:13:08 )
"The Four Fathers"
PLOT SYNOPSIS:
Ennis is humiliated to discover that Alma does not know the identity of Alma Jr.'s father. Ennis must now take a blood test, and he must use every trick in his book to coaxe the three men into willingly providing Ennis with their genetic material, so Ennis can accurately establish Alma Jr.'s paternal lineage for the purpose of divorce.
In the end, Ennis turns out to be the real father after all, because the way Alma likes it "don't make no babies..."
TOoP/Bruce:
by - bjblakeslee (Thu Apr 27 2006 14:14:44 )
"The Gay Civil Union Crashers"
PLOT SYNOPSIS:
A light hearted look at a Jack and Ennis seventies reunion, when instead of going fishing, they decide to go to Denver and drop in on gay wedding. Jack wagers Ennis that whoever can have sex with all members of the 8 man wedding party in the next 24 hours will not have to pay for the next fishing trip.
Jack asks Ennis if he's in?
Ennis replies,"You bet!"
Much humor as Ennis attracts mostly co-dependent women and short guys.
Jack wins the bet, but breaks Ennis's heart. Jack and Ennis make up, make out, make love, and make off with a bottle of champagne.
Ennis and Jack come to realize that fishing trips are what they do best, and they agree to see each other for trout season.
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