Our BetterMost Community > Chez Tremblay
Jake Jake Jake!
souxi:
Your quite right Laura. Jake MAY have attended the memorial service in LA,and/or the funeral in Perth, we simply DON,T KNOW.
All any of us can do is guess and wonder and speculate. No it won,t make our pain go away and certianly won,t make his go away. He doesn,t HAVE to say anything if he doesn,t want too, and if he doesn,t then he shouldn,t be pressed into doing so.
Whatever he is doing, I just hope he,s ok. He MAY say something in the future, he may not, who knows?
Mikaela:
--- Quote from: LauraGigs on February 15, 2008, 12:47:54 pm ---
Doubting his grief or sincerity at this time just seems out of the question to me.
If Jake were to say something, would it just make all our pain go away?
--- End quote ---
Just a brief follow-up to the above 2 quotes that I've taken from your post, Laura;
I have never doubted Jake's grief nor sincerity when it comes to Heath. I do think Jake may be a bit ambivalent at present about Brokeback; that's not the same thing.
And I certainly don't for a minute expect that if he were to say something, the "pain would go away". I'm not certain where that impression comes from, I haven't seen anyone here saying anything like that, nor implying it.
Otherwise I for my part have had my say and see no reason to go on about it in post after post.
myprivatejack:
LauraGigs,I don't doubt and never have doubted that Jake is not obliged to say anything about this topic, and I think I've said it quite clearly in my post.I only said that IF IT´S TRUE THAT HE DID´N´T ATTEND HEATH´S BURIAL it was illogical according to my point of view and to what is usual for respect to the family,at least.How could I know if he has really attended?Well, of course I couldn't,because news here arrived lately and badly and I only can suppose what you explain here,or not?.
Excuse me,but as English is not my mother language,sometimes I don't understand what people are saying-and sometimes people don't understand what I say,as I see...-:what did you mean by "I'm just having a really hard time understanding where people are coming from here."Can you explain it,please?.Because if it's said to me and because of me,well,I repite,I'm only quoting what people say here,not in my country,and I can secure you I'm not the gossip kind.Thanks.
delalluvia:
--- Quote from: LauraGigs on February 15, 2008, 12:47:54 pm ---3) A lot of how we react to a close one's death depends on what we feel happens after death. (Has the person 'moved on to a better place'? Been reborn? Have they simply ceased to exist? Are they hanging around, ghost-like, seeing who 'pays respects' and who doesn't? Do they have awareness of our thoughts and feelings – a semi-godlike state?)
Your guess on all these is as good as mine. But the point is, our feelings on this probably hugely influence our theories on how the bereaved should behave.
4) Jake comes from a spiritually diverse upbringing (Jewish mother, Swedenborgian father). He studied Eastern religion/philosophy at Columbia. And he had sufficient inner depth and emotional intuition to plumb for the part of Jack in such a way as to break our hearts. Doubting his grief or sincerity at this time just seems out of the question to me.
--- End quote ---
Excellent points, Laura. Heath himself said over on the Heath in his own Words thread that he didn't believe in Jesus, so who knows what his personal belief system was or if, indeed, he even had one? Jake is, as you said, from a diverse background himself, religiously speaking, so if Heath - for example - thought religion in general was the opiate of the masses, was atheist or agnostic and thought all the life after death stuff was foolishness, Jake may be trying to respect that but at the same time not being very open about it, lest he hurt Heath's family/friends, who may not believe the same and are taking comfort in the belief that they will see him again in another life.
Does anyone know if Heath had a belief system or not?
j.U.d.E.:
Laura, I agree with what you said!
I don't think for a minute that Jake is being disrespectful! No way! I am sure there is a reason for what he did, didn't do, didn't say. Maybe, if he hasn't said anything nor taken part in the tribute or wake for Heath, it is because he can't/won't say good-bye to his friend just yet. We'll see in time, but right now, I think we just should all leave him be! I hope he is ok, supported by loved ones and in good spirit.
j. U. d. E.
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