Our BetterMost Community > Chez Tremblay
Heath Heath Heath
optom3:
--- Quote from: belbbmfan on June 10, 2008, 02:36:24 pm ---Thanks for your post Optom. I must be hard to 'recognize' so much of your brother in Heath and now the tragedy that unfolded last january.
I'm glad your brother is doing okay now. And you too.
:-\ :(
--- End quote ---
Thankyou so much. It has bothered me for ages that as well as the horrendous grief I felt over January, that there was something else that I could not quite grasp.
The past 24 hours reviewing all the HHH posts and pics,it clicked.I was watching my brothers decline.It was almost surreal,my brother could not live with his wife and child and yet he could not manage without them.He just became even worse than normal. His wife could not cope with the drinking etc, nor could she manage the middle of the night pacing, writing, playing his instruments. They split up. Eventually once he settled on the Ritalin they now show every sign of getting back together.His visits get longer and longer.
Now as funny as it seems the grief over Heath has eased a bit, and is replaced by anger, which is slightly easier to bear.My brother was the lucky one,it wasn't even his family who saved him,we were far too far away.It was a really good friend who just would not take no for an answer.As fast as my brother tried to refuse help, he just kept on and on.
Lo and behold, within just 2 weeks on Ritalin,far from it crushing his artistic side,(which he worried about enormously) he could actually concentrate better.His own words,I wish some one had put me on it years ago.
The repayment came when the friend was diagnosed with leukaemia and my brother pretty well lived at the hospital towards the end.Two good friends both far away from home, who supported each other and made enormous differences to each other.
That is what Heath needed, and what annoys me is that he was such a gentle soul in many respects he should naturally have had very loyal friends.I know you can't force someone to get help,but you can have a bloody good try.like my brothers friend did,until the person just gives in, for a quiet life.
My words, I wish some one had been there for Heath, and had cared enough not to take no for an answer. I pray to God none of my kids ever become famous.
My husband took me literally kicking and screaming to the psychiatrist at the beginning of the year.I was not going, no way no how.He just ignored me.As soon as I stopped washing and cleaning that was it.I gave him such a punch as well.I screamed all sorts of abuse at him.He was right, I am back on meds and am so much better.I was very wrong.
The same happened with our older son.The problem is generally the last person to see or admit to a problem is the person themselves.
My whole family have been blessed with people who did not take no for an answer,thank God.I really do mean blessed as well.
I hope Hollywood sit up,take notice and do something in the future.They are quite happy to have their pound of flesh and big checks.Well in my book that comes with a certain responsibility towards the star.The police,army etc, all have people on hand to counsel if things appear to be going wrong.But not so for the stars of the screen.
They have by now, seen enough troubled stars over the years to know when something is not right.How in the name of humanity can they just sit back and appear to ignore it.
People say you can't force someone to get help.Wrong ,you can if you care enough.It might not be easy, it may well be time consuming, and soul destroying, but it can be done.Half my family are testament to that.
I am 100lbs on a good day, my oldest is 160lbs, I can still get him in the car to the psychiatrist.I think it is because when you love someone so much, you get an enormous surge of adrenalin which means you can do the seeming impossible.
O.K rant over,I told you I was now more angry than upset.
I hope Hollywood one day stand up and hold their collective heads in shame.
optom3:
Have we had this one before? I should know as I went through page 1 to ----- last night. Anyway I love it and he's my man of the year, every year.
optom3:
--- Quote from: SunShadow on June 10, 2008, 06:17:54 pm ---Fiona, like you I have been going through the HHH thread from page 1, but am only up to page 45, LOL. You are amazing! It is certainly difficult at times, and I will look for what you describe as I move farther along. The photos are oh so wonderful, though, that any sadness is somewhat mitigated.
--- End quote ---
It starts to become more obvious after sept.07.It is not just that he is sartorially challenged,I love that quirkiness, there is more to it.I know I am not imagining it.I also know that he probably, like my brother could not give a stuff what he wears,but he starts to look unkempt,as well, his hair is not just his loveable bed head, it is dirty and his complexion gets really sallow.
He also seems to loose a lot of weight, but not in a get fit and toned sort of way. Oh well see what you think. If we had hindsight we would all be millionaires with perfect kids and marriages.
I was fine until I started to feel that all was not right with him,then I just became upset all over again.
Penthesilea:
Good morning Heathens :)
Another one of the Advocate shot in 2006:
optom3:
--- Quote from: Penthesilea on June 11, 2008, 02:14:30 am ---Good morning Heathens :)
Another one of the Advocate shot in 2006:
--- End quote ---
I know I've said it before but it sure is good to have you back, delivering our daily dose of Heath loveliness.!!! I have finaly learned how to get the pictures I want and then post them,so I may add.Actually I didn't learn, my son showed me,!! However that is a measure of how much better he is, that he would do something like that for me.
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