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What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
TOoP/Bruce:
What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:02:54 )
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Doffed hats should be placed on knee farthest from campfire.
No more than three swigs before passing whiskey bottle.
Sauteed Elk should be well salted.
Canned Baked Bean Labels should be rotated towards camera.
All new to me.
Any more?
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - poorlittleteacher (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:09:28 )
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<<Doffed hats should be placed on knee farthest from campfire.
No more than three swigs before passing whiskey bottle.
Sauteed Elk should be well salted.
Canned Baked Bean Labels should be rotated towards camera. >>
You can't get comfortable until your boot is shoved ALL THE WAY INTO the fire.
Parkas should be readily accessible at all times.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - muscla_1 (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:14:38 )
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Tent sharing can have VERY interesting results!
Let's see...Sheep are referred to as "woolies."
"Jack, I swear..."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:15:05 )
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Dinnerwear and cutlery should be washed immediately after use in nearest stream.
It is polite to pause between axe-swings when addressed by those a-horse.
Sheep are properly dragged by hind legs only.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:31:11 )
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Always refer to cigarettes as 'smokes.'
When at home, place no more than six empty beer bottles on any one horizontal surface; repeat until all available surfaces are filled.
When greeting a friend after a long absence, carefully knock off his hat before pressing him against nearest wall.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - lnicoll (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:41:11 )
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UPDATED Wed Jan 25 2006 07:01:41
When a cowboy goes into a house or trailer, he must take off his cowboy hat. It is acceptable to keep said hat on in grocery stores, post offices, or bars.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - EnnisLovesJack (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:44:56 )
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When greeting a friend after a long absence, carefully knock off his hat before pressing him against nearest wall.
mmm hmmm!!!!
"I'm sending up a prayer of thanks."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - poorlittleteacher (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:46:51 )
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Three words: Lean. Against. EVERYTHING.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - lnicoll (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:49:22 )
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Cowboys must wear proper cowboy attire: hat, shirt with snaps (not buttons), jeans with a belt, and boots. A coat in cold weather is acceptable. The attire borders on a uniform and the only choices a cowboy has are: color of the hat; pattern/color of the shirt; fabric of the winter coat; and belt buckle.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Julie01 (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:52:39 )
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Ha, poorlittleteacher--including Ennis.
If there's blood on your shirt front, and both sleeves, you should change it (even if you only have one other), but blood on only one sleeve--you can roll up the sleeves.
Divided duties are strictly divided--camp tender washes everything, cooks, puts tent up and down, starts fire, cooks. Herder looks after the sheep (except under speciual circumstances, when two are needed for this).
"You come back and see us again"--Jack's mother
TOoP/Bruce:
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:53:36 )
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When tucking in back of shirt, stick hand waayyy down back of pants.
When tying knots or conducting other business requiring two hands, place 3/4 burnt cigarette in mouth and squint.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:54:27 )
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When asking a cowboy to dance, it is best to waylay him enroute to men's room. If, after some time, he remains drinking at bar, approach him and make some reference to mating calls.
Be sure to remove heavy platform shoes before depositing feet in lap when requesting footrubs.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:58:23 )
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Color of cowboy hat and horse should differ lest one appear too 'matchy.' Black hat with palomino, or white hat with roan mare are acceptable.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 15:58:39 )
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When deciding whether to accept a proposal of romantic union, it is acceptable to allow at least twenty years for the decision.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:00:19 )
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>> Color of cowboy hat and horse should differ lest one appear too 'matchy.' Black hat with palomino, or white hat with roan mare are acceptable.
Ditto when courtin. Contrasting hats are de rigueur.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:04:33 )
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When lassoing friend, apply lariat from the front. Lassoing from behind may lead to fisticuffs.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - sweetlilgygy (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:05:33 )
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UPDATED Tue Jan 24 2006 16:06:06
DRINK AND SMOKE AT ALL TIMES!
!!The Brokeback Mountain Maniac YEE-HAW!!
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:10:42 )
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Deposit supine cowboy in backseat before removing top.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - dirtbiker888 (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:21:53 )
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UPDATED Tue Jan 24 2006 16:22:58
Always bring toothbrush on camping trips for those unexpected exchanges of saliva
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:27:04 )
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Do not remove price tag from tacklebox.
Initial postcards are more properly addressed to General Delivery; it is polite to send postcards directly to residence only after the first assignation.
Remove all clothing, including cowboy hat, before leaping from cliff.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:38:24 )
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While seemingly courteous to offer to pay for one's rodeo clown's drink, this may lead to awkward exchanges.
When expressing interest in a new man, it is considered appropriate to toss your tresses wildly from side to side.
While eating pie, do not offer a bite to ex-beard.
Electric knives do have a place at the well-appointed Thanksgiving table.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:48:18 )
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Don't order no soup.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
TOoP/Bruce:
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 16:51:41 )
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Directing a punch through an open car window towards one who has called out "Hey *beep* watch where you're going," may prolong an encounter best kept brief.
Real men watch televised figure skating rather than football on Thanksgiving.
When someone offers to help clear dinner table, it is impolite to accuse them of buggery, even if you have reason to believe it true.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 17:00:35 )
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UPDATED Thu Jan 26 2006 11:05:27
When a new client approaches, one does well to stand erect and greet them with a simple, "Senor?"
When travelling to consummate a long-delayed tryst, redlining is permitted.
Use of the word "condiments" may indicate an intention of absconding with another person's spouse.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - poorlittleteacher (Tue Jan 24 2006 17:03:21 )
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Be able to catch carelessly tossed objects (watches, keys, etc.) on command.
Ride bulls as frequently as possible to avoid being drafted into the Army.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 17:05:15 )
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It is impolite to observe mountaintop sex acts through powerful binoculars without prior warning.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - poorlittleteacher (Tue Jan 24 2006 17:09:05 )
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Brush up on weird ass jargon like "stemming the rose" and "on the QT" and "pair of deuces" before applying for a job.
Be prepared to be put on hold during your own job interview.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 17:09:50 )
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Referring to a man as a 'pissant' in front of his wife should in no way be construed as rude.
New employees need neither be welcomed nor bid adieu.
One can most clearly indicate fondest affection by casting aspersions on the other's harmonica playing.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - jmmgallagher (Tue Jan 24 2006 17:36:11 )
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Foodstuff and beverages suitable for campsite dining: beans, spuds, corn-on-the-cobb, whiskey, elk.
Less than suitable items include: rice pilaf, dips requiring boxed soup mix, frozen daiquiris of any flavor.
Re: about that leaning
by - Flickfan-3 (Tue Jan 24 2006 17:57:45 )
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good catch poorlittleteacher
could there be some mystical symbolism in that stance they definitely prefer--
as in
leaning toward homosexuality--can't be straight--needing support--can't stand on their own two feet--
maybe I've been on the boards too long
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - lemonadestand2003 (Tue Jan 24 2006 18:13:58 )
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UPDATED Tue Jan 24 2006 18:14:34
Don't get so drunk that you can't stand up and need to be on all fours. This may lead to cowboy foreplay such as being invited to sleep in the tent after the fire goes out.
Football versus figure skating
by - balrog20-ressurected (Tue Jan 24 2006 18:27:24 )
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"Real men watch televised figure skating rather than football on Thanksgiving."
Yes,yes,yes, I knew there was something bugging me about this scene. I thought it was the music during the Jack Nasty fight... of course... there is figure skating on TV.
Monroe is a big wimp. He cuts turkey with an electric knife for chrisakes. A real man uses a knife, ie Jack and Lureen's Dad. He doesn't react when his wife gets in a fight 'till too late. And he watches figure skating. Not to mention living in a boring tract house and running a somewhat wimpy business.
(and before the figure skating people jump all over me, I am a male figure skater who can land a few decent jumps ((Salchow, toe loop, Lutz)). So I am justified in passing judgement.)
thought you didn't like soup..
I'm sick of beans..
too early to be sick of beans..
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - balrog20-ressurected (Tue Jan 24 2006 18:41:19 )
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Its perfectly acceptable to have sex fully clothed, just slip down pants a little. Keep boots on all the time.
After drinking, rough sex is preferable to "hearts and flowers" style sex. Its cool to grab your partner by the collar and force 'im into position.
Its considered good form to say "gun's going off" at the appropriate time as a courtesy to your partner. Then you both may go to sleep
thought you didn't like soup..
I'm sick of beans..
too early to be sick of beans..
TOoP/Bruce:
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - adpaduch (Tue Jan 24 2006 18:46:41 )
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When working as a herder, all underwear should be avoided to allow for quicker access as well as to steer clear of those worrisome "boxer lines".
All open wounds should be doused with hot water applied by a dirty bandana.
In case you can't grow sideburns, apply brillo pads to face.
Life's too short, babe, time is flying
I'm looking for baggage that goes with mine.
[Post deleted]
This message has been deleted by the poster
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - cmr107 (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:06:28 )
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Bump! Love this thread!
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - kwlsea (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:12:44 )
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Cowboys from Texas don't drink coffee.
Politely tip hat to lover's wife and ask about the children before rushing off for hot sex in a motel.
*beep* is a multi-purpose middle name, used as an endearment or as a expression of frustration or anger.
Look both ways before slamming your long lost love against the wall for serious tongue wrestling. Remember to keep clothes on when making out in the parking lot.
Be careful to enunciate clearly so that "goin' fishin'" doesn't come out "goin' *beep*
If one says one is "goin' fishin'," be sure to drop the creel case in the river upon arrival to get it wet. Check for notes from suspicious wife.
This is the best thread in a long while.
If you are pitching a tent...
by - davidinhartford (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:13:40 )
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If you wake up in the middle of the night "pitching a tent" be sure that there is a drunk, horny cowboy nearby for assistance!
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - poorlittleteacher (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:17:55 )
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Performances of "Water Walkin' Jesus" are best accompanied by a coffee-pot drum solo.
It's considered offensive to perform music on broken instruments in the presence of other cowboys.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - henrypie (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:19:52 )
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UPDATED Tue Jan 24 2006 19:21:03
"You can't get comfortable until your boot is shoved ALL THE WAY INTO the fire. "
Baaahahahaha! You're so right. I love that unintended humor.... or IS it? Jack is playin' with fire!
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - delalluvia (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:20:12 )
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When really p*ssed - spit.
Team Jolie
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - poorlittleteacher (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:22:15 )
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If you get kinda drunk and crazy with your ranch mate one night, things are best patched up by getting naked the next day and washing his shirt as a peace offering.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - cmr107 (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:25:14 )
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When settling down in a tent for the night, be sure there are no herds of Chilean sheep near yours.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - henrypie (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:27:35 )
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To the common prohibition on discussions of the volatile trio of politics, religion and grammar, an exeption may be made for brief talk, and singing if necessary, about religion.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - carmenjonze-1 (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:30:52 )
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Cowboys must wear proper cowboy attire: hat, shirt with snaps (not buttons), jeans with a belt, and boots
and western women's shirts should be primary colored with contrasting darts with arrows.
__
Loudspeakin' Papa,
You better speak easy to me.
--Ethel Waters, 1929
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Spooky_Rabbit (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:38:24 )
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When entertaining advances from a fellow cowboy, make sure your respective wives are powdering their noses and be certain to keep your legs spread as wide as humanly possible.
Instead of coming out when confronted by your heartbroken wannabe girlfriend, push a favored variety of pie around your plate and say something snide about her rebound beau in a hostile tone of voice.
"Yes ma'am, I'll have a cup a coffee, but I can't eat no cake just now."
TOoP/Bruce:
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - poorlittleteacher (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:46:46 )
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Any kind of pastry is not a good idea in times of sorrow or angst.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - flashframe777 (Tue Jan 24 2006 19:50:01 )
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A cowboy must only dance with his head tilted down, eyes firmly on the floor. The proper technique to dance with a pushy woman is to use one arm to keep her at arm's length, and the other arm to chainsmoke until the situation subsides.
"You bet." --Ennis del Mar
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - SURFINgurl713 (Tue Jan 24 2006 20:06:40 )
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i love this thread!! =)
"if you can't fix it you got to stand it"
connection in an isolating age
-stephanie
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Julie01 (Tue Jan 24 2006 20:27:40 )
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The home of a poor rancher may be in CONSIDERABLY better taste than that of the daughter and son-in-law of a wealthy machinery manufacturer--without even having hardly any furniture in it.
"You come back and see us again"--Jack's mother
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - poorlittleteacher (Tue Jan 24 2006 20:32:51 )
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If you're a latently gay cowboy with a little money on your hands, the best way to out yourself is by selecting decor for the dining room.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Julie01 (Tue Jan 24 2006 20:37:24 )
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That diningroom was of no sex whasoever...
"You come back and see us again"--Jack's mother
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - ndatmo-1 (Tue Jan 24 2006 20:43:13 )
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Yet another Ellemeno Classic! "one does well to stand erect and greet them..." Is that from the Rustlers & Hustlers Handbook?
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - ndatmo-1 (Tue Jan 24 2006 20:45:44 )
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Don't use all of the hot bathin' water until you've asked others if they would care to share.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - henrypie (Tue Jan 24 2006 20:46:16 )
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Purple velvet! YEEEEHAAAAAWWWW!
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Julie01 (Tue Jan 24 2006 21:12:45 )
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Dark lavender goes REALLY WELLL with new blue jeans...
"You come back and see us again"--Jack's mother
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - hibbler (Tue Jan 24 2006 21:25:48 )
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LOL!!! Even better than the "Geisha Hidden Agenda" thread!
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - ndatmo-1 (Tue Jan 24 2006 21:50:01 )
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Try to keep your kickin' and punchin' straight... Kick your temperamental truck, punch the one you love.
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - cmr107 (Tue Jan 24 2006 21:53:36 )
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BUMP! Love it!
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Rontrigger (Tue Jan 24 2006 22:46:56 )
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I wanna know where THIS one's from: "While eating pie, do not offer a bite to ex-beard."
"You can't have Ennis without Jack."--Annie Proulx
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 23:12:10 )
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UPDATED Tue Jan 24 2006 23:21:57
When streaking out the door with boyfriend, it is most cordial to offer wife some smokes.
Wine should be well aged before proposing a toast to one's little girl's impending marriage.
For emphasis, it is considered quite useful to insert invective in one's beloved's name.
Be sure to choose carefully which back pocket to tuck your work gloves in. Remember - righty tighty, lefty loosey.
When guests are seated at your table, it is best to use a cup for spitting.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Ellemeno (Tue Jan 24 2006 23:20:59 )
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Remember, the guest is always right, but the stud duck's a turkey.
Nail polish should be placed AROUND the nail area, not merely on it.
When wiping the noses of small children, it is helpful to have three hands.
Consider moving any harmonicas from back pocket before mounting horse with low startle point.
When having motel sex, it is acceptable to poke one's thumb in one's own eye. However in a tent, one ought poke said thumb in one's partner's eye.
"It's nobody's business but ours - and our IMDb friends'."
Re: What nuance of Cowboy Etiquette did YOU first learn from this movie?
by - Rontrigger (Tue Jan 24 2006 23:34:07 )
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Make full use of spit and clear slick--especially when you suddenly realize you're hot for your best friend.
"You can't have Ennis without Jack."--Annie Proulx
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