Our BetterMost Community > BetterMost People

What to do when one of your loved-ones gets cancer

(1/3) > >>

mvansand76:
Hi all,

Only two weeks ago my only sister was diagnosed with cancer. This is the scariest thing that has ever happened to me and I am still struggling to give my sister the best possible support there is. She has Hodgkins, which is a highly treatable cancer, but still, she is gonna have to undergo chemo for at least 6 months.

How do you deal with the ups and downs that your loved-one experiences? For instance, one moment my sister is joking about the wig she is getting, the other moment she is crying about having to cut her hair and worrying about how her kids are going to react. I just try to go with the flow and help her as best as I can, but it's so hard...

Have you ever gotten bad news like this and how did you deal with it? How did you support your loved-one?

Mel

Scott6373:
My brother passed away in June 2005, after a 4 year battle with brain cancer.  A little less than a year ago, my oldest brother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer (he, thankfully at this point, is in remission).  There is no prescribed way to deal with it, other than to allow yourself to feel whatever you are feeling.  In doing this, you allow other family memebers, and your sister, to be free to feel what they need to feel.

Kelda:
I think thats very good advice.

Laugh with her cry with her be there for her.

Thankfully none of my immediate family has dealt with cancer in reality.

My sister has had a few scares - one very recently when she had a lpea sized lump at her collar bone but it was not cancerous.

I am very much a worry about being ill when you knoe you've got something to worry about but I'm not sure that was the best approach for her.

David In Indy:
I think your being there with your sister is probably the best medicine you could give her, Melissa. Sometimes, when you really don't have the words to say, or you don't know what to do, just sitting and listening to her will help her a lot. Allow her to cry and laugh and get angry. I'm sure this will help her more than you can ever imagine.

And remember, we are all here for you sweetie! I'm sending you both lots of positive energy from Indiana!  :-*

Kerry:

Tell her you love her, Melissa. And be a good listener.

Navigation

[0] Message Index

[#] Next page