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~~THE PERFORMANCE THREAD~~ **aside** ((action)) %%thought%%

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Pipedream:


((A little laster on the pasture...))  :)

saucycobblers:

--- Quote from: Pipedream on September 19, 2006, 05:36:22 pm ---** High there, Terry Cloth! Ummm... I think I can enlighten you some on the mistakes our lil' Butt Lotion mentioned above. I just happened to attend a business meeting in London with him, and let me tell you just this much: during the short time it lasted, your beloved JBB had an affair with a mop in our hotel, got hot and heavy with the Towel of London and made out with a Jet Rag on our way home. Rather tacky, ain't it? Oh well, just thought I oughta tell ya... **
--- End quote ---

((From the BAM Gift Shop, by the power of teloopathy...))

JBB:

%% Lies!! All lies!!! You fowl temptress Owl Olivia... don't think for one minute... OH...%%

((JBB's memory dimly recalls a furtive fumble in the broom cupboard of a far-away land.))

%% I'd forgotten about the mop. That fowl owl may have a point. Damn that Sheep Pee whiskey!!%% *blushes*

alec716:

--- Quote from: nakymaton on September 20, 2006, 02:39:54 pm ---BULL:

I hear Jack Twist has been ridin more than bulls. I want an explanation, and I want it NOW.

--- End quote ---

Meanwhile, back at the White House ...

(( Having averted a domestic crisis because a woman thought to utilize a commonly available commerical service as would have be-hoove-d MONICA LEWINSKY,



U.S. PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH rustles himself a bull to ride.  Seems like everyone else is doing it!

  ))

nakymaton:
BULL:

**Look, I may be a Texan, but I didn't vote for him either, all right? I'm a lifelong DeMOOcrat.**

((The BULL keeps crashing through curio shops and souvenir shops until he finally finds Jack staring at a bunch of postcards.))

Hey, bud, I've got a message for you from Wyoming. Someone who thinks you've got a nice tail says some cows want you for some kinda calf operation. They said there may be a paternity suit involved or somethin.

Didn't think you owned a suit, but that's what they're sayin.

Daniel:
YOUNG JACK:

((puts down the postcards.))

**Huh? Wyomin' you say? A paternity suit? For calves?**

((Jack blinks for a moment, saying nothing, is a little irritated by the peacock feather drooping into his face.))

**I ain't touchin' that with a ten foot pole. They got the wrong fella.**

ANGRY SOUVENIR STORE OWNER:

** Excuse me sir, does this BULL belong to you?**

YOUNG JACK:

** Nah, I only bested him once. He's still wild.**

((Jack leans down and whispers to the bull.))

** I'd get off those antidepressants if I were you. Ya don't need em that much.**

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