JACK'S PANTS -
%% What the HELL'S going on here?!!%%Jack
Whoa, whoa whoa! Tell you what, I cain't go no where without m' pants!
Although, come to think of it, I AM prepared to do a love scene.
** JACK, boy, what's all this fuss about?! You know
exactly where I am, ever' second a the day and night! You know I ain't more 'n a few feet away from ya....
ever. Now I'm gettin' folks pokin' at me and pullin' at my seams an buttons (what's left of 'em after that one lady chewed her way through more than she shoulda) and I can't figger out what's all the danged hubbub! There was all this wailin' and cryin' and beggin' from this big buncha gals....I couldn't make out what they was sayin', only my name over 'n over.... then one day I caught a earfull blowin' in on the Wyoming Wind....
"Oh, Mr. PANTS.... this is Do-Do, Monroe's second favorite employee.... Please, Mr. PANTS... return safely to JACK, and then.... well.... just get back on him so's you can get back off him, 'cause me and the other Priestettes have a very strong hankerin' for....." Well, you git the idea, JACK--- I don't know
what in the HELL all these WIMMIN have ta do with me an you, but couldja tell 'em ta stop their blubberin'---
I been here the whole time! Okay... well, wait a minnit.... yer not still sore at me fer my little visit with them purty JAMMIE PANTS a ENNIS'S are ya? It didn't mean nothin', JACK, ya gotta believe me! I swear I wasn't tryin' to sneak into the Del Mar laundry basket in hopes a ENNIS bein' fooled into thinkin' I was his and... um...tryin' me on, or nothin'.... **