YOUNG JACK:
**Well people, I'm sorry I'm not actually entertaining you. The truth is... this place is just too quiet.
The sheep are silent, no dogs have barked. Even my low-startle point horse has shifted to park.
The wind has cried, the grass has moaned, but that's just about it... everyone's out on loan.
My jeans are still, No birds have sung, I'm gettin' bored! I'm fit to be hung!**