Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > The Lighter Side
Completed Brokeback Limericks!
Lumière:
"You better shut yer slop-bucket mouth"
"And while you're there you could head down south" .
"Wanna keep yer teeth? Go on, beg!"
"Well?? Do it! Or I'll break yer leg!"
"Fine! I warned ya" ... "ow..ow..OUCH!!!"
##-----------------------------------------------------##
He woke up with a top-grade headache.
Ennis mumbled, "What've I done, for God's sake?
Have my dreams just come true?
I just did it with you!
Hell, I still must be dreaming awake!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Ennis stumbled out of the tent in a daze,
He wouldn't even give Jack a gaze,
He'd enjoyed the night's activities,
Had never experienced such festivies,
He thought, "I aint no queer! Must be a phase!"
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Jack stood naked by the river,
The friggin cold made him shiver.
"He'll never talk to me again!", he sighed.
But to himself he belied,
there is hope yet, and more than a sliver!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Lureen had talent as a barrel racer,
and when she saw Jack Twist, she became a chaser,
she even uttered the matin' call,
and didn't know how hard she'd fall,
She thought if she came to close Jack would mace her!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Jack and Ennis shared an embrace
that had them both in a complete daze
Ennis savored Jack's musky smell,
And they craved Muscatel
since for THIS occasion, whiskey seemed out of place!
Lumière:
The blue heelers were on the job,
They were vigilant, tho' they weren't paid a bob.
But their work came with excellent perks;
They worked with two hunks who weren't jerks!
What those dogs got to see makes us squee, swoon and sob!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Jack could feel Ennis' breath on his neck,
His heart was beating wildly beneath his pecs.
With his eyes open wide,
He felt Ennis' rough hands on his side,
and he knew he was in for spectacular sex!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Lureen hid Jack's blue parka,
So he'd buy her a Marka.
She was peeved 'cause he was goin' fishing,
And she was truly wishing
That he'd stay home and ---k her!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
The minister was aching to kiss the bride,
Heck, could be his last chance for such a ride.
He thought: man, she is hot!
But the groom thought: She's not!
Bad news really on either side!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Pa Del Mar's driving was lousy,
That whiskey had made him drowsy.
Oooops! Was that the one curve?
but he was mean and this he did deserve.
But poor Mrs del Mar, so frail, tiny and mousy!
Lumière:
Far away from the grieving plain
A man named Ennis hid his pain.
Then along came Jack who had a plan,
He knew for Ennis, he was The Man!
Their sweet mountain life felt right as rain.....
##-----------------------------------------------------##
He found twin shirts hanging in the closet,
Into Mrs. Twist's bag the shirts he did deposit,
He wept for Jack, missing him so bad.
The shirts his remembrance of what they'd had,
His tears fell, his eyes leaking like a dripping faucet.
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Ennis was muscular, lean as a clothes-pole,
He couldn't rock, but he sure could roll,
Jack was thin and could buck and twist,
and when he first saw Ennis, he couldn't resist
He was blown away, mind, body and soul!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Ennis was dizzy, drunk and on all fours,
when he let his love for Jack run its course.
He was tired, sleepy, horny and drunk,
and into the cozy tent he would plunk,
Knowing Jack would always be his horse.
##-----------------------------------------------------##
The distant mountains beckoned them,
To their powerful greatness, they would succumb
Kneeling to the kind of love
That is pure like a white dove.
The rose they continued to stem.
##-----------------------------------------------------##
His aim was bad, Ennis knew how Jack sucked,
"If I don't shoot an elk," Ennis thought, "we're phukt.
So Ennis pulled out his big gun, "Gonna Shoot!",
"No more beans for dinner", he said with a hoot,
So tent games they began to conduct
Lumière:
The year was 1967,
Jack was meeting Ennis behind the 7/11.
They kissed like mad
What a great time they had!
Having on earth a bit of heaven!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
When he dreamed of Ennis, he broke into sweat
since he was the hottest guy Jack'd ever met,
so sportive and lean
(although too fond of beans).
Ennis made his lusty dreams vivid, wild, and wet!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
The best part of Ennis? Jack grinned,
Is that he finally sinned!
Within a dark tent,
He pounded Jack till he was spent.
They were sad when it came to an end.
Lumière:
I can't smell no roses, said Jack
'Quit talking boy!' growled Ennis, 'On yer back!'
Jack's breathing quickened as he obeyed,
And in that position he stayed
He was blown away by Ennis' prowess in the sack!
##-----------------------------------------------------##
The boys reunited in the stairwell,
They could both feel their crotches swell,
Their lips then met,
The kiss was quite wet,
they were re-defining the term "a hard sell".
##-----------------------------------------------------##
They fell into the small motel bed,
Body to body, head to head
Naked as the day they were born,
They made love till they were worn.
Their sexual hunger had been fed.
##-----------------------------------------------------##
A lone cowboy arrives in Signal Wyoming,
All his life he's been roaming.
All his possessions in a brown paper bag,
self-conscious, too serious, not planning to brag
For love will follow the gloaming.
##-----------------------------------------------------##
Tenderly, they held each other in the dark
but heartache had already left its mark.
So many hopes crushed, words unsaid
dreams gone pale, plans left for dead
As they listened to the sad tunes of a distant lark.
##-----------------------------------------------------##
I wish to punch Jimbo the Clown
for making Jack feel sad and down.
Who the hell does he think he is?
Well, a homophobe, that's hard to miss......
So he should be run out of town.
##-----------------------------------------------------##
What in the hell happened to August?
What do I do now with my lust?
with Randall its just not the same,
He's femme and weak and tame.
Searching for Ennis is now a must.
##-----------------------------------------------------##
We don't know much about Fayette,
She was quiet and submissive, I'd bet.
You knew she doted on Lureen,
whom she treated like a queen,
Her only mistake - not taking LD to the Vet.
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