Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > Brokeback Mountain Open Forum
Finally...
silkncense:
Hey thanks Delalluvia!
Not only that ! But the great thing was he told several other 'straight' males that I'd tried to convince how great he thought it was & that they should give it another shot! The thing to me is, he moved it out of the Leno/Letterman joke range into a serious, great film range. Because he is a straight male (and former cop to boot) they are giving more credence to his opinion (not that I like THAT aspect, but I am glad however it comes about that someone gives this film serious consideration.)
The only issue I have is, I have tried to forward an e-mail to my home that he sent me @ work ( I work for WA state Government) & it has never been received by me!!?? It was a very thoughtful e-mail about how WA state blew it by the Supreme Court not affirming gay marriage. I keep wondering - WHERE did his e-mail go (have tried now THREE times - have not had this issue before while sending or forwarding e-mails to my home!)
Hope I am just unreasonalby being paranoid.
dly64:
--- Quote from: Daphne7661 on August 07, 2006, 12:52:47 pm ---On another message board, I had used the words "chosen ones" and got a bit blasted by some as being pompous, or possibly referring to myself and others as being "chosen" in a religious type of way, but I truly believe that, of all the people who have seen this movie, a group of us feel as though we "got it", hence Bettermost and all the other websites and message boards.
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--- Quote from: ednbarby on August 07, 2006, 01:22:38 pm ---I've been profoundly moved by movies before. But not to the extent that any of the characters have stayed with me for more than a few days afterwards. More that they've made me examine my life and I've gone on to do some more of that without giving much more thought to the characters themselves. …. I couldn't stop thinking about their fates. I fell in love with both of them. I still am and always will be. …. No matter what comes and goes, these characters will always be in my heart. And that's never happened to me with any fictional character before and I doubt it ever will again. Jesus H., nothing like this.
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--- Quote from: Momof2 on August 07, 2006, 01:42:29 pm ---I too have wondered why THIS movie has affected me in this way. I have seen hundreds of movies that made me look at things differently but have never stayed with me like this. Most nights Jack and Ennis are the last thing I think of before I go to sleep and are with me the next morning and through out the day. I am so glad I decided to watch BBM. Maybe we are the "chosen" ones that will change the world. I have never seen my self as an activist but now when I hear someone making snide remarks about "gays" I give them an earful. Especially when someone says it is a choice. I said, How can you think it is a choice? Who would chose to be discriminated against and hated for how and who they love. No one would choose that pain. Did you "choose" to love women. Why is it a choice for them. As I have said before, I have a very close friend that is gay and I think if I heard someone say something about them now that I would be the one doing the bashing.
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I was made aware of this thread with a note that silk posted on another thread. I went back to some of your initial comments and I agree with all of you.
My family laughs at me because I always have what I call “film obsessions” or “star obsessions.” Those are the times when I either have to watch a particular film over and over or watch one particular star over and over. I have had some great ones on my list (such as Johnny Depp and Cillian Murphy … whose films I still adore). But, the longest any one obsession has lasted has maybe been a few weeks … a month at the most. However, BBM has stuck to me like fuzz on a lollypop. I absolutely can’t shake it. This is one of the few times that it is not just about the stars, but about the story. If it would only be about Jake and Heath, I would have quit this film months ago. But here it is …. months later … I still watch the film in whole or in part at least once a day.
My sister asked me why this film has hit me the way that it has. I tried to articulate what I was feeling, but felt mute. The overwhelming emotions that BBM evokes (for me) is indescribable. My sister does not want to see it. She is a pastor, but that is not why she doesn’t want to see it. She doesn’t like movies with tragic endings … and BBM is one of those films.
As for inflammatory comments about gays, race, religion, etc., I always go ballistic. When I asked my brother, who is BIG TIME homophobic, to watch the film, he said “I refuse to watch two f****ts.” I let him have it. (It is especially important that my brother cool the rhetoric because I believe his son, my nephew, is gay …. which is another topic altogether!). IMO, prejudice is a form of misunderstanding …. demeaning comments are a form of ignorance. Nothing will change if we, the public, don’t acknowledge our own biases. We all have them … we can’t deny their existence. Once we make an assumption about any given group of people, we are prejudice. Until we can open ourselves to another’s POV, there will always be sexism, racism, religious bigotry, etc.
ednbarby:
--- Quote ---BBM has stuck to me like fuzz on a lollypop
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LOL!
Or, like... white on rice? ugly on a monkey? a cheap suit? ;)
It kind of surprises me in a way that your sister doesn't want to see it at least out of curiosity, in spite of her fear of its tragic ending. I also have to say that I don't get people who can't deal with a tragic ending in a movie. A co-worker of mine has been holding one of my two "loaner" copies of BBM for ransom for four months, now. She keeps not wanting to see it because she knows "it'll be so sad" but she doesn't want to give it back because she says someday she might "be ready" for it. Yet she'll turn around and tell me all the gory details of the latest killings in Lebanon or Israel or about the batshit crazy woman down here who murdered a grandmother and her six-year-old grandson in cold blood last week. Is there some kind of problem with the ego-formation in people like this? Or am I just tougher/colder than most people? Seriously - I need to know.
Momof2:
As for inflammatory comments about gays, race, religion, etc., I always go ballistic. When I asked my brother, who is BIG TIME homophobic, to watch the film, he said “I refuse to watch two f****ts.” I let him have it. (It is especially important that my brother cool the rhetoric because I believe his son, my nephew, is gay …. which is another topic altogether!). IMO, prejudice is a form of misunderstanding …. demeaning comments are a form of ignorance. Nothing will change if we, the public, don’t acknowledge our own biases. We all have them … we can’t deny their existence. Once we make an assumption about any given group of people, we are prejudice. Until we can open ourselves to another’s POV, there will always be sexism, racism, religious bigotry, etc.
I guess sadly that this is true. This movie has really affected all of us. Any time someone does not understand something then automatically it is wrong. All it takes are a few lunatics to decide that something is dirty or immoral and it spreads like wildfire. So sad.
serious crayons:
--- Quote from: dly64 on August 16, 2006, 09:13:29 am ---My sister does not want to see it. She is a pastor, but that is not why she doesn’t want to see it. She doesn’t like movies with tragic endings … and BBM is one of those films.
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Here's an idea: Invite your sister over, put the film on. Then just after "Just sending up a prayer of thanks." "For what?" "... For you forgettin your harmonica. I'm enjoying the peace and quiet" jump up and turn off the TV! Then say, "So did you like the movie?"
A friend of mine did that when watching "Carrie" with her mother, who was kind of emotionally fragile. Right when Carrie and her date get to the prom stage, just as she's looking around the room all happy and excited for the first time in her life, seconds before the blood comes pouring down on them, Gwen hopped over and turned off the TV. And her mother went through the rest of her life thinking it had a nice happy ending.
Sometimes I wish someone would have done that for me with BBM!
--- Quote from: ednbarby on August 16, 2006, 09:55:23 am --- Yet she'll turn around and tell me all the gory details of the latest killings in Lebanon or Israel or about the batshit crazy woman down here who murdered a grandmother and her six-year-old grandson in cold blood last week. Is there some kind of problem with the ego-formation in people like this? Or am I just tougher/colder than most people? Seriously - I need to know.
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Hmm ... Well, I think there's a different kind of empathy involved. I like to think I feel some empathy for strangers in the news ... a horrifying series of stories here recently about a pit bull mauling a 11-year-old boy made me cry, though maybe partly because I have an 11-year-old son. (Chicago-area residents: did you see that series? Very well done stories, but how awful!) I think humans are wired to feel saddest about the fates of people they know well or are related to. And watching a movie gives you the sense of knowing the characters well. Feeling sad about people in a different part of the world, or even closer to home but whom we've never met, takes a larger sense of empathy and justice. It's a good trait, but I think for most people it's a less emotional reaction.
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