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Six-month anniversary

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moremojo:
Howdy, fellow Tremblayans and fellow Brokebackaphiles:

Just wanted to send a quick shout-out (while preparing for my big upcoming scene as Jimbo [hissss!]) to commemorate the fact that today marks six months to the very day that I first saw the movie of my life, whereupon I haven't been the same since.

It was a bitterly cold Saturday afternoon, that February 18th, and Scott was mindful that the next morn would see him transformed as a thirty-nine year old man--gettin' up there in years, aren't we? His mom was in town, and he thought this would be an ideal chance to see the movie, the one that his pal Melinda asked him if he had seen everytime they communicated. God, she loves this movie! I reckon I'll enjoy it well enough, but not necessarily expecting much from it...still curious though.

It's now about one A.M., and everyone has gone to bed, some hours after seeing "Brokeback Mountain" and discussing it. It definitely struck a nerve with all three of them (Scott, his mom, and his sister), but Scott is feeling more numb than anything else.  Despite the tears that welled up in his eyes in the theater, and stung upon exposure to the bitter night air outside. But here, lying in bed, thinking on what he has seen, some primal emotion, from deep within his being, rises up from that hollow feeling and engulfs him. Ennis, poor Ennis...he thinks to himself. He begins to sob--he has fallen in love and lost that love all at the same time. He is thirty-nine now...life has changed.

newyearsday:
Thank you Scott. For re-capturing your experience so well and sharing it with us. The huge sadness (of the northern plains...) of this movie is something I still keep at bay sometimes. I haven't watched the movie since it left the theaters in April because of how much it might affect me.

But reading your post takes me back and reminds me of why we are here. To love and change. Happy Anniversary bud.

moremojo:

--- Quote from: newyearsday on August 18, 2006, 10:51:50 am ---Thank you Scott. For re-capturing your experience so well and sharing it with us. The huge sadness (of the northern plains...) of this movie is something I still keep at bay sometimes. I haven't watched the movie since it left the theaters in April because of how much it might affect me.

But reading your post takes me back and reminds me of why we are here. To love and change. Happy Anniversary bud.

--- End quote ---
Thank you for your heartwarming reply ((((((((hugs))))))))...

I saw the movie five times in the theater, and would have seen it more that way had it not left town the weekend before the DVD release (I remember crying over the movie's departure, as if I was having to say goodbye to Ennis and Jack again!). I still have watched the DVD all the way through only once--the sadness is somehow too great to bear in the space of my home.

BBM has definitely changed me. My heart is more open, while I'm conscious of wanting to be a more loving person, a less judgmental person, less encumbered by fear. My interest in the Western heritage of my home state of Texas has been given new life, and I am receptive to country-and-Western music to a degree that is unprecedented. And I can never look at a man in a cowboy hat the same way ever again!

Still coming out, in all kinds of ways,
Scott

vkm91941:
Happy Anniversary Scott!   :-*

Thank you for sharing this moving and tender memory will all of us, Scott. Aldous Huxley said that every man's memory is his private literature.  In this case I think your memory resonates with the private musings of many of us Brokies.  This film evokes very poignant and personal reactions in all us, regardless of gender or orientation and it brought us together as community to share at least a part of our journey on to becoming.

Ellemeno:

--- Quote from: moremojo on August 18, 2006, 10:05:53 am --- but Scott is feeling more numb than anything else.  Despite the tears that welled up in his eyes in the theater, and stung upon exposure to the bitter night air outside. But here, lying in bed, thinking on what he has seen, some primal emotion, from deep within his being, rises up from that hollow feeling and engulfs him. Ennis, poor Ennis...he thinks to himself. He begins to sob
--- End quote ---

This was me too, Scott, on New Year's Eve afternoon, when I first saw it, and beyond.  I have enjoyed your posts many times, I remember being so happy when you arrived here from IMDb.  Hug, Clarissa

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