Three Holy Men and a Bear.
A priest, a Pentecostal preacher, and a rabbi all served as chaplains
to the students of Northern Michigan University in Marquette.
They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to
talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really
that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to
another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into
the woods, find a bear, preach to it and try to convert it.
Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.
Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had
various bandages on his body and limbs, went first. "Well," he said,
"I went into the woods to find me a bear and when I found him, I began
to read him from the Catechism. Well that bear wanted nothing to do
with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy
water, sprinkled him and he became as gentle as a lamb. The bishop
is coming out next week to give him his first communion and
confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheel-chair, had one arm
and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best fire-and-brimstone
oratory, he claimed, "Well, brothers, you know that we don't sprinkle!!
I went out and found me a bear, and I began to read from God's holy
word. But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took hold of him
and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, up another and
down another until we came to a creek. So I quickly dunked him and
baptized his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a
lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
The priest and the reverend both looked at the rabbi, who was lying in a
hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors
running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape. The rabbi looked
up and said,
"Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start."