If the boys had looked at reality when they came down from the mountain....and really accepted that they weren't going to be able to be together....what would their life had been like?
If Jack had not went looking for Ennis but instead had focused on living what life he could...either with Lureen or 'the foreman's wife'.....
If Ennis had stuck with one of those jobs instead of quitting to go meet Jack twice a year...would he have been better off financially? Had more responsibility?
I don't think they would have been happier. They couldn't change who they were. I think this goes deeper than the dream to be a high-class concert pianist. It is about being the person you truly are, about not pretending, about being accepted.
What I can rely to in Ennis' and Jack's story, is the aspect of pretending to be another person than you are and of living the wrong life. When I grew up, I lived in two different families. In one, I had to pretend
all the time. I had to be the reasonable, quiet, unobstrusive child who brings good grades home from school and is more or less non existent for the rest. No friends allowed to bring home, no loud playing, singing, don't talk too much. Everything a normal child does was unbearable for my parents. I was more or less non-existent in that family. I had to
pretent to be non-existent, I couldn't be the person I am.
In my sencond family, I was just a normal child. And I was just myself. I am not a quiet and unobsrusive person, I am high-spirited, sometimes loud, very talkative, have a bad temper from time to time, love to be around other people, bring friends home, and so on.
All this I could be when living with my second family. And I was not alone there. I had three sisters, we were a loud and jolly bunch and sometimes the sparks flew. I was accepted there the way I was. I was at
home there.
I can't tell you how happy I was every time I was allowed to go to my second family (the deal was, I had to stay with my bodily parents for school days, and was allowed to go home on many weekends and during the school holidays).
And how devasted I always was when I had to go back to my bodily parents. How alone, empty and hollow felt all the time I wasn't at home (and that was the greater part of the year).
But: would I have been better off, if I hadn't have my second family at all? If I had never known them? Or if I just had given up and submitted to the life my parents wanted me to live? . No fucking way!
You have no idea how thankful I was (and still am) for my second family. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it weren't for them.
The situation caused me much hurt. But it was better than not having my second family at all. It was better to be myself only for some time and to pretend for the rest of the time than to never be able to be myself at all.
This is not about dreams and plans you have for your life. It is about being who you are and being accepted for yourself.