Author Topic: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)  (Read 17178 times)

midwest-girl

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #20 on: September 05, 2007, 06:39:46 pm »


        Try and throw in one of your famous chase scenes.  That was like none other.  Wonderful,

and seat of your pants exciting....               just sayin....no pressure....... :D

LOL!!  I wish I could, but this fic is completely different from Shades.  Probably way more boring.  It's definitely not action packed, I'll say that much.  Sorry!

midwest-girl

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #21 on: September 06, 2007, 11:24:51 am »
Hi, guys!  Chapter One is up at http://midwest-girl.livejournal.com/9228.html

Hope you enjoy it!

Offline mariez

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #22 on: September 06, 2007, 12:47:05 pm »
Hi, guys!  Chapter One is up at http://midwest-girl.livejournal.com/9228.html

Hope you enjoy it!

Thank you, Amy!  Of course I enjoyed it.


SPOILERS







Wow.  And so we end the first chapter with .......Jack and Ennis, alone, on a mountain.  Wow, again.  This is some damn fine writing.  You can lay to rest any feelings of nervousness, or that this wouldn't measure up, or that the readers shouldn't expect much.  And boring?  Impossible.  My heart doesn't pound like that when I'm reading boring.  You hit all the right notes with the "is this the end of my life" portion - not melodramatic and not overly rational.  Very real.  And I really like the intimacy of the first-person narrative.  Already looking forward to more - who is Ennis del Mar and why was he on his very first plane ride?  Terrific, Amy.  Thanks!

Marie


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The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

mvansand76

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #23 on: September 06, 2007, 02:25:01 pm »
Thank you, Amy!  Of course I enjoyed it.


SPOILERS







Wow.  And so we end the first chapter with .......Jack and Ennis, alone, on a mountain.  Wow, again.  This is some damn fine writing.  You can lay to rest any feelings of nervousness, or that this wouldn't measure up, or that the readers shouldn't expect much.  And boring?  Impossible.  My heart doesn't pound like that when I'm reading boring.  You hit all the right notes with the "is this the end of my life" portion - not melodramatic and not overly rational.  Very real.  And I really like the intimacy of the first-person narrative.  Already looking forward to more - who is Ennis del Mar and why was he on his very first plane ride?  Terrific, Amy.  Thanks!

Marie





Yeah, what she said....  ;) You said it perfectly Marie!

You know whats's so funny? I was on the train back home from work (when I left work at 5.30 PM my time (Holland) Amy still hadn't posted her first chapter and so I went home still not knowing what this story was going to be about) and suddenly, I thought plane crash! This is so weird, because after that, I thought "No, the story can't be about a plane crash, because planes don't crash because of turbulence!"

 ::)

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #24 on: September 06, 2007, 02:27:36 pm »


    Amy:

       I bow down to the mistress of suspense and drama.  That was an awsome beginning Amy.
I love love loved it.  The only thing wrong with it, is having to wait for more. 
       It was just like being there... but without the fire burns                     love          janice



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Offline David In Indy

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #25 on: September 06, 2007, 03:58:26 pm »
Super good first chapter Amy!!  :D

I'm enjoying it just as much as I enjoyed SoG.

Did I just say that? I never thought I would hear myself say that! Well, I guess I didn't hear myself say it because I typed it!  :laugh:

But I digress.

I can't wait to read chapter 2! And I completely understand if you need to take some time inbetween chapters. But please don't leave us hanging for too long, okay? Because this is REALLY good!  :D

**********************SPOILERS!!!***********************************


*********************SPOILERS!!!************************************




This almose seems like one of those "Lost" deals. You know the TV series I'm referring to? Anyway I'm wondering how they will get off that mountain, but I'm glad they found some extra clothes and protection from the wind and snow.

Thanks Amy!! I love your story!  :)
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mvansand76

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #26 on: September 06, 2007, 04:03:14 pm »
Super good first chapter Amy!!  :D

I'm enjoying it just as much as I enjoyed SoG.

Did I just say that? I never thought I would hear myself say that! Well, I guess I didn't hear myself say it because I typed it!  :laugh:

But I digress.

I can't wait to read chapter 2! And I completely understand if you need to take some time inbetween chapters. But please don't leave us hanging for too long, okay? Because this is REALLY good!  :D

**********************SPOILERS!!!***********************************


*********************SPOILERS!!!************************************




This almose seems like one of those "Lost" deals. You know the TV series I'm referring to? Anyway I'm wondering how they will get off that mountain, but I'm glad they found some extra clothes and protection from the wind and snow.

Thanks Amy!! I love your story!  :)

Hey sweetie, you're online!  :-* And you read Amy's first chapter! Yeeeeeeeh!  ;D

Offline David In Indy

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #27 on: September 06, 2007, 04:08:48 pm »
Hey sweetie, you're online!  :-* And you read Amy's first chapter! Yeeeeeeeh!  ;D

It's very very good!

I didn't want it to stop!  :laugh:

 >:( >:(

I was disappointed when I reached the end of the chapter because I didn't want it to end. I got really involved in the story.
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Offline louisev

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #28 on: September 10, 2007, 07:43:00 am »
The writing is very high quality, certainly.  But...


SPOILERS
























But I had a problem with believability, considering Jack has both broken ribs and a broken wrist, how he could possibly  have managed to drag Ennis out of the wreckage or even tugged on him slightly.  Or carried blankets, or rolled over a dead weight full sized man.  One handed?  A broken wrist renders the entire hand useless.  And hurts like hell, which is not mentioned at all after the crash is over.

Anyone besides me have a problem with believability there?
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mvansand76

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Re: Turbulence - new story by midwest-girl (Amy)
« Reply #29 on: September 10, 2007, 07:54:53 am »
Didn't the broken ribs and wrist happen when he fled the exploding plane?

I am not sure...  :-\