May I add. Alternatives are needed. An ombudsman is an alternative.
That does not mean that Phillip and moderators are not needed nor unfair; they do their very best or best!! I applaud them and all members!! We all have faults and good points; so do I too!! It's already overpowering, such great surveying task for Phillip and moderators, and growing at a rapid speed!!
Certain things remain unsolved still on Bettermost, unfortunately; and, an ombudsman can help likely - and my I add surely as independant from all: owner, morderators, members!! I see the NEED MORE and MORE for growth; certain things have become stale and many are hurting (either they have been hurted or feel as that is so, plus they or others need help to solve issues which they consider needs - and need - I accent, everybody needs help on Bettermost and I do too; we need and can reach out more much, much more with certain dynamics (ways) and core subjects (needs)... may I note.
More rules? And, that growth of Bettermost (with more members or same number) does NOT need to be more rules; the present rule of Phillip's of no personal attacks will continue surely, and might be the only one needed. Unresolved issues as personal attacks, different cultures or thoughts, emotions, varied sexual orientations, numerous subjects, raw emotions, etc., will need an ombudsman, surely!! Plus:Structures are needed too, if an ombudsman decide that can be results.
There has to be an ombudsman; to me there is no doubt about that. For justice. To help everyone too, which included Phillip, moderators and all members!!
That does not mean that Phillip and moderators are not needed, nor any member and non-members.
Presently, I meet some members who write things that are not fair, as misunderstandings are happening, and some personal attacks too (before and during the recent actors passing and after, and surely that will continue) as that is human nature. Some members have harmed me for no reason without checking to me if there was truth nor to see if I made a mistake; I am sure some harm I likely did also to other members; that is also human nature; nobody is perfect!!
There are non-members that have reached me privately via my computor and are afraid to become Bettermost members, do not want to become Bettermost members since they have examined it, and are not pleased with it... yet. Of course, we need to be better and better. I think that non-members as well as members want Bettermost to be better... become so with some changes forever!! WE are not blind to that!!
I am often misinterpreted wrongly by many members. You say that we have freedom, yes we do to a certain extend, but that is changing too negatively unfortunately: some do not want me to use, for instance, the following words:
I have been attacked often by some members, wronly I repeat being called disrespectful but they did the same and some continued to do so!!
There are some homosexual gay men subjects that we are NOT allowed to talk about so far; why? Is Annie and the BM talk about only heterosexuality!! ?? I think that most of us, if not all of us, are here to talk about Annie's book and the Brokeback Mountain movie, and about all the many, many, many issues unnumerable ones it illustrates... touching us!!
Lesbianism seems also to be a taboo for some; we here have been ridiculed or likewise, when we try to talk about lesbian issues. About gay bashings, about murders, about religions, and many other issues!! We need to vent... at times, and maybe an ombudsman can see that and give results like how and much more... like I do not know yet, and the ombudsman will find solution to that!!
There are also many female issues that need to be addressed, but too many members shy way from that, do not even start a thread about that!
We do need gay (homosexual) gay moderators; there seems to be none or not enough; an ombudsman could verify that; and if the owner (Phillip) gives that power to an ombudsman, that a report can be done, to create research, which will be analysed by the ombudsman, and could recommend or not added gay moderators for certain reasons and go ahead to do it if that ombudsman had that added power. This is only one example.
So far, I see many gay men who are members wanting out... considering quitting Bettermost and some have and not returned unfortunately to present their expertise (questions, answer, research, etc., to help), even though Bettermost is the best so far. You say segregation; yes, to a certain point... and it's needed; that does not mean that gays will not go into other sections (as you said segregations), as they want; and vice versa. Like it or not, when two persons speak, that is two segregations!! Plus there are other bigger group(s), and the overall society (in this case Bettermost forum).
Segrations is already here, like or not; there are groups on here now!! That are facts!!
There is no perfect solution anywhere and we can still become better (isn't that why it's called Bettermost?)!!
Ombudsman is much more than a judge: it's an impartial one.. also a researcher, an analyst, etc., a humanist!!
I say that we also need more moderators; I do not feel more free when homosexual men issues have two females as moderators; surely am not the only on!! I know that females, for instance, feel better when they talk TOGETHER about certain subjects; for instance, a girl talks to her mother more freely about female sex than with her father on certain vaginal troubles or health; I now that my mother who is in her 80's always has and refuses still to talk to me about that and prefers to do so with her daughters or sister-in-law or with other women.
As for certain subjects, I suppose that there could be 3 gay (male homosexuals) moderators for directing gay issues or to result a tie in a complaint or a request. For female issues, 3 females for instance. Etc; for justice for all.
If a complaint is not solve there mutually, then the ombudman's is contacted; that is another task for the ombudsman, as ONE I foresee.
Of course, an ombudsman must use logic, be fair, etc. for justice, for peace among members, for also making programs or sections in Bettermost to be added as they need to be developped and give that task to Phillip I suppose who will with moderators; these are specifics I have seen about ombudsman... as a 2nd task!
As 3rd task, the ombudsman decision is final!!
I hope that I brought some reasons for an ombudsman that will not be shy and that will do its job with fairness for all members.
No harm done to anyone, I am grateful to all,
awaiting your news,
hugs!!
