I'm trying to rearrange my thinking on some of the most anger inducing actions of people in this horrible event:
The ambulance guys - I was absolutely floored when I saw them rush the gurney off the curb and watched Heath's poor head bounce up and down. I was angry at the masseuse. I bitterly complained to my sister, who has also been following the stories and she - of all people - helped me with a different POV:
The rough treatment by the ambulance guys? "You saw all the cameras flashing, they were probably trying to rush him to the ambulance to keep those buzzard paparazzi guys from taking all these morbid pictures."
The masseuse? "Well, Heath hired her. Maybe because she wasn't licensed or trained in CPR she had cheaper rates. Plus according to her, he was already cold when she finally touched him. No CPR in the world was going to save him by then."
I know the stages of grief, and anger is one of them, but like most accidental deaths, there is really no one and nothing to be angry at - except the Fates, the gods - who maybe loved him much more than we - and of course, insensitive photogs and blathering media personalities, but they had nothing to do with - I almost wrote 'Ennis' - Heath's death. You just feel so helpless.