Author Topic: David's Daily Journal  (Read 24564 times)

Offline David In Indy

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David's Daily Journal
« on: February 07, 2008, 02:14:16 am »
Daily Journal. Yeah right! I'll bet this turns out like all these other threads I've started in here. A few days of posting and PHFFT!! Nothing.

*Confessions of a Gay Altar Boy - Splat!

*The Photo Club - Kaboom!

* The Indianapolis Colts - Fart and fizzle.

* Keeping Up With The Sims - Computer meltdown.

Lord, I could go on and on.

So, you get the point. Here we go again. But what the hell, right?

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Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #1 on: February 07, 2008, 02:30:52 am »
Heath Ledger, Misunderstanding and Discrimination

I've been thinking a lot about poor Heath today. All this dreadful news, and the terrible rumors which are still flying. And the terrible comments made by people about Heath. He is so misunderstood, and I wonder why? What was so mysterious about Heath? Nothing really. He was a brilliant, talented, handsome man and a loving father. But for some reason people want to pin all this mystery on him. I started wondering if maybe Heath felt misunderstood while he was alive. I hope not, but I don't think all this misunderstanding suddenly happened once he was dead. It must have been there earlier, and I wonder if he was aware of it.

This got me to thinking about my youth. I felt very misunderstood as a child. When I was younger I didn't really understand it. Then when I become older (a teenager) I learned to fear it. You see, my mother was Native American, French and African American. This was a very misunderstood mixture here in the Midwest. My mother really couldn't hide it. She was called every name in the book, and often in my presence. It hurt her very badly, and she wanted to make sure I didn't suffer the same fate. So she told me secrets.

"Around here, even one teeny tiny drop of Black blood is too much" she would warn me. "Don't you NEVER tell nobody about it or I'll whoop the tan off your ass".

My Native American looks were enough to cover up my Black heritage - for the most part, although being a Native American in the 1960's wasn't a very good thing to be either. At least not around here. So my European roots helped cover up the Native American, and the Native American helped cover up the Black. The problem was, I didn't look White. I didn't look Black and I didn't look Native American. So people asked questions. And then there was my Roman Catholicism in a Protestant city and state. And we won't even go into my feminine qualities as a child.

So, people wondered, people talked, and sometimes people asked a question or two.

I wonder if Heath suffered from a feeling of misunderstanding and isolation. I sure hope not.

But they're talking aren't they? And they're asking questions. And they're wondering. I wonder if they realize how painful that can be to others?

Poor poor Heath!  :'(  :'(
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Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #2 on: February 08, 2008, 03:36:36 am »
Nothing to talk about I guess. I had a shitty day. What else is there to say about it?  :laugh:
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Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #3 on: February 08, 2008, 04:05:22 am »
                            So ya had a bad day??

      Aw David what happened to make your day shitty.?  Did you have a fender bender?
Were you late to work and the boss gave you crap over it?  Did you get splashed by
a passing car, and soaked to the skin, having to wear your wet clothes all day long.  Did you lose your ATM card in a mean card eatng machine and you cant get a duplicate until they mail it to you.?  Did your money in the bank inexplicably disappear.? 
Did you have a pina colada and get caught in the snow.  Did you miss the last courier and
not get to send out your nightly balance sheets.  And lastly but most importantly you
missed the call from your dear one.  And just as you finally got in contact.  The battery on
your cell phone died.........

       Huh huh tell me.  What happened.           I have been having a shitty week too. 
                                                                  Maybe we can hang out and throw wadded
                                                                  up paper wads at the mice.

    Hugs honey          ;D

 and by the way i was looking forward to keeping up with the Sims



     Beautiful mind

mvansand76

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #4 on: February 08, 2008, 04:43:38 am »
Heath Ledger, Misunderstanding and Discrimination

Poor poor Heath!  :'(  :'(

{{{{{David}}}}}

Sweetie, are you OK? I was very touched by your post... It's exactly what I've been wondering about... makes me so sad...

Offline Kelda

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #5 on: February 08, 2008, 05:03:34 pm »
 :-*
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Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #6 on: February 12, 2008, 01:33:28 am »
I had a thought a little while ago and it's been haunting me ever since. It was one of those "strange connections". You know what I mean don't you? You suddenly notice something but you're not quite sure why... or how. I posted this thought in another thread but nobody noticed it, and now it's buried. It's too important to go unnoticed, because I think it's significant. Perhaps it's already been discussed, but if so I didn't see it.

Anyway, did you all know there is a Broome, Australia? It is situated on the west coast of Australia, on the same coast as Perth, Heath's hometown. Isn't it strange he died in an apartment on Broome street? I wonder if Broome street was named after Broome, Australia? Maybe this name is what promped Heath to look at the apartment in the first place and then decide to rent it.

Maybe Heath was feeling very homesick and this name reminded him of Australia.     :'( :'( :'( :'(

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Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #7 on: February 12, 2008, 01:56:08 am »
I just looked out the window and it's a winter wonderland out there. We are having a snowstorm. A BIG one.

Did you know that each and every snowflake is different? No two snowflakes are exactly alike. Never in the history of the world has two snowflakes been exactly alike. Each is different and unique. Just like people.

A snowflake under magnification



Look how intricate it is. Look at all the detail. It amazes me that one single snowflake can be so beautiful. And there are millions of them laying out there right now. Billions. Zillions. And each one is totally and absolutely different. I really hate to back my car out of the garage tomorrow morning because I don't want to break any of them. Each of them is a work of art. A masterpiece of nature. A miracle really.


We are all different and unique too. Each one of us is different and unique just like a snowflake. But unlike a snowflake, we are living and breathing creatures, and each one of us is capable of thoughts and feelings. And dreams. Before we say something or think something cruel of someone else, maybe we should stop and think about the beauty of the snowflake, and then remember the person we are getting ready to insult or hate on is so, SOOOO much more. If I feel remorse about driving my car over  some snowflakes and crushing them, how could I possibly crush a person using harsh words without leaving myself a very guilty conscience?

Aren't they beautiful?  :)







« Last Edit: February 12, 2008, 03:44:42 am by David »
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mvansand76

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #8 on: February 12, 2008, 05:02:14 am »
It's so beautiful! I wish we had some snow here...

 :-* :-* :-*

injest

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #9 on: February 12, 2008, 07:33:57 am »
I had a thought a little while ago and it's been haunting me ever since. It was one of those "strange connections". You know what I mean don't you? You suddenly notice something but you're not quite sure why... or how. I posted this thought in another thread but nobody noticed it, and now it's buried. It's too important to go unnoticed, because I think it's significant. Perhaps it's already been discussed, but if so I didn't see it.

Anyway, did you all know there is a Broome, Australia? It is situated on the west coast of Australia, on the same coast as Perth, Heath's hometown. Isn't it strange he died in an apartment on Broome street? I wonder if Broome street was named after Broome, Australia? Maybe this name is what promped Heath to look at the apartment in the first place and then decide to rent it.

Maybe Heath was feeling very homesick and this name reminded him of Australia.     :'( :'( :'( :'(



I dont know, David. some people say that all this kind of thing is just coincidence and our minds looking for connections...but then sometimes it feels like you are looking out a window and the curtain blows back for a minute and you get a glimpse of something but you don't know what it is...

like there is a big mystery tying things together that if we just concentrated hard enough we could understand everything..

Offline underdown

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #10 on: February 12, 2008, 10:00:50 am »
Hi David,

That was a beautiful post about snowflakes. All unique, just like human beings.
And your post about Heath, misunderstanding and discrimination.
It made me think.
Heath was certainly an especially unique person, and that draws attention: the good and the bad; appreciation and misunderstanding.
BetterMost is, to me, anyway, a testament to how much a very unique story; a movie with a very unique cast; can affect sensitive, intuitive people, draw them in, and draw them together.
I've met a lot of those people on BetterMost, where sensitivity (in the nice definition), intuitiveness and uniqueness seem to almost jump out of the posts.
Nowhere else have I seen as much diversity of rapidly changing thoughts; almost like quicksilver. It's as though thoughts and ideas are bouncing around at light speed. (And no wonder people go off topic, sometimes).
So, what the heck if your interests are so many, and change so often? Unique, sensitive, intuitive, inquisitive, thinking people are the reason BetterMost is such a wonderful, interesting place.
Aren't they?
And some are the same people who see the uniqueness of everything, and of every individual, sometimes to the point where the sheer complexity is almost overwhelming.
 :)

Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #11 on: February 12, 2008, 09:41:34 pm »
I dont know, David. some people say that all this kind of thing is just coincidence and our minds looking for connections...but then sometimes it feels like you are looking out a window and the curtain blows back for a minute and you get a glimpse of something but you don't know what it is...

like there is a big mystery tying things together that if we just concentrated hard enough we could understand everything..

I guess I'm still struggling with it then. It suddenly struck me and I thought I'd mention it to see what other thought about it. :)



It's so beautiful! I wish we had some snow here...

 :-* :-* :-*


Hi David,

That was a beautiful post about snowflakes. All unique, just like human beings.

.....


Thanks Melissa and Rob!!  :-* :-*
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Offline underdown

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #12 on: February 12, 2008, 10:30:20 pm »
I dont know, David. some people say that all this kind of thing is just coincidence and our minds looking for connections...but then sometimes it feels like you are looking out a window and the curtain blows back for a minute and you get a glimpse of something but you don't know what it is...

like there is a big mystery tying things together that if we just concentrated hard enough we could understand everything..

That's a very good thought.
Maybe people who are sensitive to others, and think outwardly, notice a lot that other folk don't, and see things that are beautiful, or connected.
It seems a rare gift that enables you to see the beauty, and mysteries, and complexity of life, and a rarer gift to pass it on to others.
Not something you need to struggle with. If you just accept that it happens to you, it does seem clearer.

I don't think I'm one of those rare, sensitive, caring people, particularly, but I've had quite a few experiences that scared me because they seemed so amazing. Now, they just happen, and aren't so scary. Intuition, or mind reading, or fate, just not sure, and  I still don't know if they are a blessing or a curse. Once, for example, I just knew the police random breath testers were over the next hill. They were, and I had never seen them there before. Knowing didn't help, of course, except that I did a lot of deep breathing before I reached them, but thankfully wasn't over the limit anyway. It does have it's lighter moments.
 :)

Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #13 on: February 14, 2008, 01:41:40 am »
My Mother used to tell me I was "sensitive" but she didn't mean it as in "caring". She was convinced I could commune with the spirit world. She told me I often sat in my room talking to spirits and I described people in my family long dead and who I couldn't have possibly known. When I was 20 an elder from my tribe came to visit my Mom and when I walked into the room and he looked at me he said "You are witko (loosely means "enchanted") aren't you?" I guess he picked up on it almost immediately. Most Native Americans fiercely avoid words like "psychic". Often you will hear the word "wicasha wakan" tossed around in various Sioux tribes to describe it.

Anyway, I've seen some strange things before, and I really don't know if I should be described as a wicasha wakan, but I often seem to make these strange connections. Personally I feel Heath was drawn to Broome St. out of remembrance of Australia, whether he was consciously aware of it or not. And I hope it brought him some comfort.

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Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #14 on: February 14, 2008, 02:09:06 am »
Today is Valentine's Day. I hope everyone has someone to share the day with. Nobody should ever be alone on Valentine's Day. I hope those who don't have their loved one close to them will spend the day with a very good friend. I think it is okay to show a friend platonic affection.

I sent Alex a teddy bear for Valentine's Day. He's a "Love Bandit" teddy bear and I bought him from the Vermont Teddy Bear Co. He comes dressed in a cape and a mask, and he also has a sack of heart shaped candy. I'm hoping he will arrive in England tomorrow.

Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day Bettermost!!  :-*
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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #15 on: February 14, 2008, 08:30:15 pm »
Today is Valentine's Day. I hope everyone has someone to share the day with. Nobody should ever be alone on Valentine's Day. I hope those who don't have their loved one close to them will spend the day with a very good friend. I think it is okay to show a friend platonic affection.

I sent Alex a teddy bear for Valentine's Day. He's a "Love Bandit" teddy bear and I bought him from the Vermont Teddy Bear Co. He comes dressed in a cape and a mask, and he also has a sack of heart shaped candy. I'm hoping he will arrive in England tomorrow.

Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day Bettermost!!  :-*

You are so sweet, David. I am so lucky to have met you and get to call you friend.

{{{David}}}}

Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #16 on: February 15, 2008, 12:57:08 am »
You are so sweet, David. I am so lucky to have met you and get to call you friend.

{{{David}}}}

You too Jess!!  :-*

{{{{JESS}}}}

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Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #17 on: February 15, 2008, 01:05:13 am »
Alex's bear arrived in England today, just on time for Valentine's Day!!  :D

The bear arrived while he was at work and one of his flatmates signed for it. Alex called me around 6:00 pm London time, and we talked for about an hour on the phone. We spent most of it crying because we missed each other so much. He told me he was hugging his bandit bear the entire time. I was busy trying to download all the payroll files from the server when he called, and I was watching Titanic. I think Titanic is a very romantic movie and perfect to watch on Valentine's Day. Anyhow I left it on as I talked to Alex. About half way through the telephone conversation came the scene in the movie where they pan out from the boat and show all the dark ocean water. The boat is out there alone in the middle of that huge ocean. Then it suddenly struck me - the Titanic was on its way from England to the US, and just look at all the water!! I didn't like the idea of so much water and distance separating me from my boyfriend. All the thousands of miles of water between us... all the waves, and iceburgs, and sharks!! I don't like to think of all of that between the two of us. He was as close as my ear and yet on the other side of the world from me at the same time.

I sure will be glad when he comes back here. That will happen on March 1st.

Anyway, he got his bear.

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injest

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #18 on: February 15, 2008, 01:54:35 am »
Good! I am glad he has that bear to hug! (more practice so he can really give you a genuine BEAR hug when he gets back to you!)

Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #19 on: February 15, 2008, 02:26:39 am »
Cory stayed with me last night and he brought Trevor with him (the bear Alex bought me last year) and I hugged my bear too!

It helped. :)

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Offline Kelda

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #20 on: February 15, 2008, 06:08:41 pm »
Alex's bear arrived in England today, just on time for Valentine's Day!!  :D

The bear arrived while he was at work and one of his flatmates signed for it. Alex called me around 6:00 pm London time, and we talked for about an hour on the phone. We spent most of it crying because we missed each other so much. He told me he was hugging his bandit bear the entire time. I was busy trying to download all the payroll files from the server when he called, and I was watching Titanic. I think Titanic is a very romantic movie and perfect to watch on Valentine's Day. Anyhow I left it on as I talked to Alex. About half way through the telephone conversation came the scene in the movie where they pan out from the boat and show all the dark ocean water. The boat is out there alone in the middle of that huge ocean. Then it suddenly struck me - the Titanic was on its way from England to the US, and just look at all the water!! I didn't like the idea of so much water and distance separating me from my boyfriend. All the thousands of miles of water between us... all the waves, and iceburgs, and sharks!! I don't like to think of all of that between the two of us. He was as close as my ear and yet on the other side of the world from me at the same time.

I sure will be glad when he comes back here. That will happen on March 1st.

Anyway, he got his bear.





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Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #21 on: February 17, 2008, 03:24:16 am »
We went out dancing tonight. Me and a few friends. It was a lot of fun but I found out I don't get tired very easily. Okay, I've always known this about myself, but my friends who went with me have gone home tired, and I'm still up and I'm not tired at all. Jan is here and even he's asleep. And he's only 22!! I'm sure his being drunk had something to do with it too but God ya'll, what's up with everyone these days? They get tired so easily! lol

I'm still bursting with energy and I'm not tired at all. Maybe I should go clean something. :D

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Offline Kelda

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #22 on: February 17, 2008, 08:15:02 am »
cleaning is a good idea if you want somethign to do!!!
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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #23 on: February 17, 2008, 10:16:17 am »
Cory stayed with me last night and he brought Trevor with him (the bear Alex bought me last year) and I hugged my bear too!

It helped. :)



aww...that was sweet of Cory, he is a good friend

Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #24 on: February 17, 2008, 11:44:48 pm »
It seems just as some of us are on the brink of accepting Heath's death, someone has to turn around and throw it in our faces again with rude and asinine comments. >:(

Case in point: I was just over at the AOL website and they posted a dreadful story about a woman who jumped out of a window on the 19th floor of the UN building and fell to her death. Down at the bottom in the comments section some stupid F*CKHEADS are posting things like " She probably jumped to her death because she was hooked on prescription medication just like Heath Ledger". Dumb asses. And I'm tired of fighting with them. If I post a message telling them to shut their asses up they call me a "troll". Alrighty then!

I really couldn't give a flying rat's ass what they call me, I just wish they would shut up and quit dissing Heath. I'm seeing this sort of thing over and over again on the Internet. It appears to be turning into some kind of fad. And I'm extremely sick of it. And I also think it's awful and disgusting to make cheap jokes about some woman's death. Maybe it's just me, but I think there are some VERY hateful people on the Internet and they aren't shy about showing it either. It makes me sick.

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Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #25 on: March 01, 2008, 12:47:07 am »
I met a homeless man today. He wasn't some old man with a long beard and missing teeth. He was a war veteran. A veteran of the Iraq war. The current one. I met him as I was driving home to Speedway. Normally I continue on down I-465 to the Speedway exit, but for some reason I felt compelled to exit off at 38th street. It really doesn't matter anyhow. All roads lead to my house if you know how to do it. Down at the end of the exit, near the traffic light stood a rather young man with a burgundy shirt and gray jeans. He had a sign around his neck which read "Homeless Iraq War Veteran". Most of the time I try to avoid people begging at traffic lights, not because I don't care, but rather because I don't want to encourage such behavior. But it was different this time. This man was quite young, probably in his mid twenties. He wasn't wearing a military uniform to PROVE he was a veteran, nor did he dress in dirty clothing. He wasn't trying to put on any airs. He was just a guy who clearly hit some bad luck. His face was a bit dirty and so were his hands. I couldn't help but think he must be living in squalor.

He walked up to my window and I rolled it down and handed him some money. His eye were blue and looked very very sad. I wondered what could have possibly happened to this man. I've heard about our American veterans returning home, only to find their job had been given to someone else and they no longer have a house or apartment. So what happened? Did he return home to the US, to an ungrateful country where his friends and his family left him? And nobody cares? That was the feeling I got from him. I didn't ask him any questions. I didn't want to embarrass him. He gently took the money from my hand, smiled and sincerely thanked me and then walked away.

I still don't know what it was that encouraged me to take that exit. Something told me to do it. I NEVER take that exit. I'm glad I did it. I hope it made a difference. I can't stop thinking about him and where he might be tonight. I hope he found shelter somewhere safe. I wish I had given him more money than I did. I hope he finds happiness soon.  :'( :'(
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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #26 on: March 01, 2008, 01:09:11 am »
David, you are so sweet. That was the Spirit leading you so that encounter did make a difference.

you are very tuned you know. You are ?winkte? (is that spelled right?)

{{David}}

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #27 on: March 01, 2008, 01:54:18 am »



             You are a living angel David.. from the story  "angels among us"



     Beautiful mind

Offline David In Indy

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #28 on: March 01, 2008, 08:50:55 pm »
Thanks Jess and Janice!

Jess: Yes, I am a Two Spirit (Wink'te) so maybe that's what led me to him.

The reason I posted this is because I find it distressing how so many people in the world, and even right here in our own country, are so "disposable" for lack of a better word. How does it happen? And why? I can't imagine how it must feel to return back to your home country and suddenly find you have no job, no place to live, no friends and no family.

I think it's absolutely and thoroughly appalling.  :'( :'(

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injest

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Re: David's Daily Journal
« Reply #29 on: March 01, 2008, 11:53:01 pm »
Thanks Jess and Janice!

Jess: Yes, I am a Two Spirit (Wink'te) so maybe that's what led me to him.

The reason I posted this is because I find it distressing how so many people in the world, and even right here in our own country, are so "disposable" for lack of a better word. How does it happen? And why? I can't imagine how it must feel to return back to your home country and suddenly find you have no job, no place to live, no friends and no family.

I think it's absolutely and thoroughly appalling.  :'( :'(



yes it is. We take and take but no one wants to give... :-\