Did Jack's Love "Wear Out"

[August7th]

There's a passage in Gone With the Wind (the book) that is interesting when considering the final scene between Jack and Ennis. Near the end of that book, Scarlett has finally decided that she does love Rhett after all, but he is no longer interested. He says to her, " . . . Scarlett, did it ever occur to you that even the most deathless love could wear out? . . . Mine wore out against Ashley Wilkes and your insane obstinacy that makes you hold on like a bulldog to anything you think you want. Mine wore out."

Thus, Rhett can "quit" Scarlett and truly not give a damn what she does or where she goes. I don't believe that Jack had reached that point. But the fact that he would vocalize a desire to "quit" Ennis makes me wonder -- although his love for Ennis was a once-in-a-lifetime love, was that love wearing out?

[Front-Ranger]

That's a good question, August. I like the way you, and Rhett, put it. Based on Jack's exasperated comment and also on his actions, as told to Ennis after his death by Old Man Twist, I would have to conclude that yes, his love was wearing out after 20 long years, and he did yearn to "settle" with Randall. The tragedy of it all was that just when Jack embraced a new life, it was cruelly taken from him by hate or a flat tire, whichever scenario you believe.

[SFEnnisSF]

I think his love wore out, and yes he did "settle" with Randall it seems, but if Ennis and changed and had come around lookin' for him and wanted the "sweet life", I still think he would have dropped everything to be with Ennis.

It is my opinion that during the Cassie "girls don't fall in love with fun" blow-up in the bus station, that Ennis right at that moment suddenly realizes it all, how it all is, and how he denied it, took it for granted, didn't act on it, etc etc.  But as we know, in the next scene, it then becomes too late.

[southendmd]

Here's where Annie's use of language comes in.  Jack says, "I wish I knew how to quit you." 

To me, this implies that Jack is essentially unable to quit Ennis; he doesn't know how. 

Sure, he probably got exasperated with Ennis's excuses, but I think Ennis is still "Mr. Right" and Randall is "Mr. Right Now".

I agree that, had Ennis seen the light, Jack wouldn't hesitate to join him.

[tango]

I think Jack was moving towards ending it with Ennis or at least towards moving on with someone else to get his primary needs met. I got the feeling that Jack yearned for a more authentic life and while he wanted that life with Ennis, he was growing tired of waiting so was willing to settle for a back up Ennis rather than have nothing at all. I think of "if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with" line.  Ending a relationship doesn't end the love or the desire but sometimes emotional survival and self respect demands it.   

I always felt if Jack didn't die when he did, that within the next 2 or 3 meetings, Jack was going to give Ennis an ultimatum.  He would either tell him to come with him to his parents and build the cabin and live the life he needed or it was over.  I think saying out loud his inability to quit Ennis was in fact the beginning of his learning to start. Can't fix what you don't acknowledge. Secondly his telling his parents about leaving his wife and bringing his ranching neighbor up to help was another possible clue that Jack was emotionally starting to distance himself from Ennis. Maybe it was another of Jacks stories that had no factual basis of ever coming true but I see it as meaning that Jack was now seeing someone else in a life plan that previously only contained Ennis for a number of years. And vocalizing the change to the only other people who knew about Ennis and how close they were through the years.

I'm certainly not an expert on the story nor the movie so my opinion could be off and just be clouded by my personal experiences. I think all of us have come to a time in our life when we decided it'd be less painful to be alone and unhappy then in a relationship and unhappy.  And many times, our emotions and minds checked out way before our bodies did.

[Sophia]

I think Jack was moving towards ending it with Ennis or at least towards moving on with someone else to get his primary needs met. I got the feeling that Jack yearned for a more authentic life and while he wanted that life with Ennis, he was growing tired of waiting so was willing to settle for a back up Ennis rather than have nothing at all. I think of "if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with" line.  Ending a relationship doesn't end the love or the desire but sometimes emotional survival and self respect demands it.   

I always felt if Jack didn't die when he did, that within the next 2 or 3 meetings, Jack was going to give Ennis an ultimatum.  He would either tell him to come with him to his parents and build the cabin and live the life he needed or it was over.  I think saying out loud his inability to quit Ennis was in fact the beginning of his learning to start. Can't fix what you don't acknowledge. Secondly his telling his parents about leaving his wife and bringing his ranching neighbor up to help was another possible clue that Jack was emotionally starting to distance himself from Ennis. Maybe it was another of Jacks stories that had no factual basis of ever coming true but I see it as meaning that Jack was now seeing someone else in a life plan that previously only contained Ennis for a number of years. And vocalizing the change to the only other people who knew about Ennis and how close they were through the years.

I'm certainly not an expert on the story nor the movie so my opinion could be off and just be clouded by my personal experiences. I think all of us have come to a time in our life when we decided it'd be less painful to be alone and unhappy then in a relationship and unhappy.  And many times, our emotions and minds checked out way before our bodies did.

thank you for sharing your thoughts. Its a very intresting idea.

[Front-Ranger]

tango, I think you are right and Old Man Twist's speech to Ennis confirms that in an oblique way.

[Sammi]

Hmm interesting idea.  I hate to think that Jack had given up on the relationship with Ennis.  I just don't want to believe it.  But the last time we see Jack he is looking pretty sullen and angry.   And Ennis said some pretty hurtful things, it's your fault, why don't you let me be... etc. I wonder if Jack finally gave up.  And I wonder what he would have done if he had received that last postcard about meeting up in November, if he would have gone or not.

[Front-Ranger]

 And I wonder what he would have done if he had received that last postcard about meeting up in November, if he would have gone or not.

Yes, of course he would have always gone to Ennis, whenever he invited him.

[Sammi]

Of course.  Nice thought.   

Part of why it's so tragic.