How was your 2008? What are your hopes for 2009?

[Ellemeno]

I've been very fortunate this year.  My mom, who had broken her ankle the year before, and whom we were very worried about because of her age, has made a fairly thorough recovery.  She has moved to a new town, and though she has yet to really make friends, she's doing pretty okay.

My beloved younger sister had a baby, and he's healthy, and my sister adores him.  I sewed for the first time in years, making a baby quilt for him that my sister and I both love (and that RouxB consulted on a time or two).

My daughter grew out of being a grabber who didn't want to share when other little kids were over, to being a friend who is growing in her joy of sharing.  She is growing in her reading skills, which thrills me, and is also working on cartwheels.  I am reduced to tears when I think of how grateful I am for her health and happiness.

My father in law and sister in law and husband have become ready to move my mother in law to an alzheimer' care facility.  My father in law and sister in law, in particular, have worn themselves down to nubbins taking care of her at home, for the 13 effin year since she was diagnosed.  I am grateful that they will soon have huge relief.

I've had a mix of a year.  Some very good - I made peace with my firm commitment to homeschool, and am finding a lot of fun and inspiring support for that.  My housekeeping has improved tenfold, due to this commitment, and because we've been having friends over again more.  After a kind of parched period where I lost a few friendships that had been meaningful, but weren't working well, I've been developing new ones with some very creative, hope-inspiring, funny, delightful women I am growing to love.  Some of my Brokie friendships are contunuing to grow, and though I didn't go on any Brokie adventures this year, some came to me, including three Brokies coming to my house for the weekend of my birthday, which was wonderful.  I still walk by a spot in my house where we hung out one evening in particular, and smile.  And I have begun being able to read and do projects again, now that Mini-Meno doesn't require constant total attention.  I joined a book club a year ago, and I learned to use my sewing machine and loved it.  I look forward to figuring out my next project.

But I weigh more than I ever have, and don't seem ready to launch into any kind of action to change that.  I have developed asthma and breathing allergies to various pretty common things.  But I'm learning how to manage those.  On the plus side, the plantar fascitis that crippled me for nearly a year (including at the 2007 Estes Park BBQ, where I couldn't even walk to the breakfast house in the mornings when the pain was the worst) is just about gone, and I am enjoying walking again. 

Sometimes having a snapshot of a dream is really useful to me, and I have one:  I picture having a small party, here at our house, with all the doors to all the rooms open, and people welcome to flow through anywhere, because it all looks so nice.  Those of you who are domestically challenged might understand the magnitude of that. 

I want to continue to make choices on a moment by moment basis that fit with "reduce/reuse/recycle."  Especially composting.  Here in Seattle, we now can put our kitchen food waste in our yard waste containers, and I still haven't gotten it together to do that.  But I want to soon.  I have some good friends who are wonderful models that way.

BetterMost is one of the foundations of my daily life.  I check in as early as I can at the beginning of my day, and like to again near my bedtime.  Some days I'm lucky enough to be on in the middle of the day too.  During the last few months, difficulties here have occasionally been greater than the pleasure for me, but only because I let it.  Some days, when I only have half an hour to spend here, 29 1/2 of those minutes are taken up with administrative stuff.  So I'm learning to delegate more.  And there are wonderful people here who love to help others, so the delegating has been a win for all, I think.  I want to thank so many of you for making this place so fun, so interesting, so lovely, so inspiring, and pleasurable. 

Happy 2009!

[Mandy21]

Clarissa, I love your summary of your 2008 and your honesty about what seems like mostly a good, positive year for you and yours.  I also like your realistic hopes for 2009.  I always believe in taking baby steps, like in the movie "What About Bob?".  One step at a time towards something positive that you know is going to change you for the better.  Anytime that I get intimidated by a task or goal, I just talk myself down to that "one step at a time" mentality, and convince myself that once I've taken that one step, it is within my power to say yes or no to the next step, and so on and so on.

In 2008, I lost my dear mother to multiple cancers.  It was horrible to lose my father in my arms in 2006, and I still hadn't adjusted to the reality of death when my mother was diagnosed with 6 different kinds of cancer in July of 2008, all of them quite progressed.  My mother wasn't a complainer, so she hid and dealt with the pain on her own and always said she was fine during the daily trips my brother and I would take to visit with her.  She went quite quickly downhill over the course of 3 months spent in hospital and in a wonderful, loving hospice nursing home.   At the end, she was on morphine to deal with the pain, but we each got to say our goodbyes.  She was 80 years + 7 hours old when she went up to be in Heaven with my daddy.

But, as they say, when one door closes, another one opens.  Right about the time my mom went into the hospital, I found my new bestest friend, right here on BetterMost, and her name is Fiona (optom3).  I am sitting on her lanai in Florida as I type this, actually, spending 3 weeks with her family for the holidays.  This is my second visit here, and it is always an adventure.  She came into my life just when I needed her most, and I am forever grateful for that.  We got to host a Brokie reunion here at her home on Dec 22, where we got to meet Dev, Sue, Steve, Laura, and Lynne.  I am now addicted to meeting more Brokies and am planning on attending more in 2009.

Also, in 2009, I plan to do more volunteer work for elderly people and for the humane society back in St. Louis.  I've been very lucky, with my family's inheritance, that I won't have to get a job for a year or so, and it will take that long to clean out their house and put it on the market.  Will be quite painful, facing up to a bazillion years of memories, so I'm not looking forward to that, but it has to be done, so I'll soldier on.  My only other plan is to see Fiona again and get her up to St. Louis in the spring.  She's possibly even more scared of flying than I am, so I will have to figure out what to tempt her with in my lovely town, other than me.

Damn, where ARE those Chippendale dancers when you need one of them?   

Well, that's all from me.  A pretty dull  and simple life by most folk's standards, I know, but I like to just think of it as "peaceful".  My life is my own, to do with what I will, and I consider myself blessed beyond belief.

So here's to a spectacular and rewarding 2009, and to making simple dreams come true, one step at a time.

Cheers!