Lawyers should never ask a Southern Grandma a question if they
>>>aren't
>>>prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern Small-Town
>>>Prosecuting
>>>Attorney called his first witness. A Grandmotherly, Elderly Woman
>>>to the
>>>stand. He approached her and asked, Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
>>>
>>>She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known
>>>you
>>>since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big
>>>disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your Wife, and you
>>>manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You
>>>think
>>>you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never
>>>will
>>>amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know
>>>you."
>>>
>>>The Lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed
>>>across
>>>the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the Defense
>>>Attorney?" She
>>>again replied, "Why, yes I do I've known Mr. Bradley since he was
>>>a
>>>youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem.
>>>He
>>>can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice
>>>is
>>>one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on
>>>his
>>>Wife with three different Women. One of them was your Wife. Yes, I
>>>know
>>>him."
>>>
>>>The Defense Attorney almost died. The Judge asked both Counselors
>>>to
>>>approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of
>>>you
>>>Idiots asks her if she knows Me, I'll send you BOTH to the
>>>Electric
>>>Chair."
