Author Topic: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women  (Read 11565 times)

Offline serious crayons

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From Salon's "Broadsheet" women's blog:

Friday, June 12, 2009 03:18 PDT
Did David Letterman get a free pass?


If there was any question that a stubborn strain of old-school sexism persists in Obama's America, one has only to look at certain leaders of what the right wing loves to call the "liberal media" but which is sounding and acting, recently, more like the frat-house media. There, like a virus hiding in the body before, perhaps, staging a comeback, misogyny has found a place to lurk almost undetected, at least by the usually sharp eyes of progressive feminists.

Examine the symptoms of this infection, beginning with David Letterman's comments (widely noted but insufficiently analyzed) about Sarah Palin "buying makeup at Bloomingdale's to update her slutty flight attendant look," as well as his joke about Palin's teenage daughter: "Sarah Palin went to a Yankees Game yesterday … during the seventh inning stretch, her daughter was knocked up by Alex Rodriguez." (Letterman insists he was talking about her 18-year-old daughter, Bristol, who actually had been, well, knocked up, not her 14-year-old, Willow, the daughter who attended the game.) A week before these remarks aired, there was an uglier outbreak of the contagion in the pages of Playboy -- never a bastion of egalitarian forward thinking, but still -- where writer Guy Cimbalo published a list of 10 conservative women he'd like to "hate fuck," a term that various observers interpreted as rough sex, sex tinged by rage, or rape. (Gabe Winant wrote for Broadsheet about the "Hate Fuck" story, which has since been yanked by Playboy.) Worse than the violence of the general sentiment was the graphic specificity of the "Hate Fuck Rating" appended to each woman -- a list that included Michelle Malkin, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, Dana Perino and Laura Ingraham. On Hasslebeck: "You'd be better served sucking off Regis Philbin." On Malkin: "Worse than fucking Eva Braun."

Both cases were met with a tepid response from the left. Though Letterman apologized on Wednesday’s show (see video below), his tone was mock-serious, and his audience chuckled along.

Imagine if, say, Michelle Obama, or Rachel Maddow, or Nancy Pelosi became the target of similar invective. The outcry from the left would be deafening. Shouldn’t liberals exhibit the same sort of decorous treatment we demand for ourselves? Sexist comments like Letterman’s and Cimbalo’s also conjure a troublingly insular, clubhouse atmosphere in lieu of an inclusive political party. What's more, the gender-based stereotypes they conjure are as stale and ignorant as any voiced by the old Neanderthal right: Pretty women are de facto stupid, sexually promiscuous and low-class. Indeed, it's the latter slight that has been least remarked upon and is, perhaps, the most disturbing. “Slutty flight attendant” is not just a sexual put-down; it's a socioeconomic one. Likewise, when Cimbalo says, of right-wing blogger Pamela Geller, "Even a Silkwood shower won't get rid of the stench of Fascist divorcee and Elizabeth Arden's Red Door," the classist sentiment is unmistakable. It's a combination of gutter misogyny and snobbery, a return to a 1950s kind of insult. This is like saying a woman has a "reputation," that she's "that kind of girl," one from "the wrong side of the tracks." Cimbalo seems to be holding his nose not at the smell of some supposedly déclassé perfume but at the stench of working for a living, of being middle-class or having middle-class tastes.

And what's the problem with sexy women, anyway? The facile answer is to say that female sexuality is threatening in some visceral, primitive way. But maybe the deeper fact is that pretty women remind us that the world is essentially unfair -- and if the world is unfair, then the progressive quest for fairness may be quixotic and unnatural. There is no more free market economy than your average singles bar. In any case, stern conservative strength in a woman has undone the left for ages: See Margaret Thatcher. Liberals would probably contend that these women present much to argue with, propounding odious views with real-world implications -- they do, they do -- but why not attack their ideas rather than insult them? Newt Gingrich and Rush Limbaugh incite their share of leftist rage, but I have yet to hear Gingrich maligned as a bimbo, or Limbaugh as a slut (just a "big fat idiot," to borrow a phrase from Al Franken, an impersonal and genderless slight). Partly, of course, this is because no such terms exist for men -- another digression entirely.

Asking why it is that liberal women do not often take liberal men to task for these attitudes is well worthwhile. Maybe we don't want to appear shrill and humorless, unable to take a joke. Or maybe it's thought that conservative women are too ideologically reprehensible to merit a defense. But to challenge this kind of sexist talk is not the same thing as agreeing with a woman's politics. If the left is allowed to remain a refuge for this sort of misogyny, if this virus in the body politic is allowed to flourish, then it is likely only a matter of time before it is once again directed at liberal women who are threatening in some way, as happened to Hillary Clinton. Call Pamela Geller racist for her anti-Islamic views, but leave her "top-heavy frame" aside.

― Amanda Fortini




Offline Nevermore

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #1 on: June 12, 2009, 05:02:03 am »
Fortini articulates exactly what enraged and frustrated me so much about last year's election ugliness--enraging that it's still okay to undermine female power (provided the attack is packaged as righteous progressive indignation) by targeting her specifically female attributes, and frustrating as hell to see women doing it to other women. Letterman's dismissal of Gov. Palin as a "slutty flight attendant" type is the flip side of the right-wing dismissals of feminists as ugly women who couldn't get a man. The subtext is, she's too pretty (e.g., a bimbo) or too unattractive, and therefore, she's not one of those women who count. So it doesn't matter if respect is not paid, because disrespecting her isn't like disrespecting women who do count.
Hate to get all retro and Bennington-womyn's-studies and all, but disrespect to one is indeed, disrespect to all, and it's disappointing to see women of either political stripe not blow the whistle and call bullshit, but no, they're too busy pulling each other's hair and scratching each other's eyes out, leaving men to jeer on the sideliens and go on running everything as they always have . I wish I could remember (and Google was no help) the name of the Victorian whoo-zis who said of the early feminists that they had "forgotten how to be ladies and not yet learned to be gentlemen."

Offline Shasta542

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #2 on: June 12, 2009, 06:20:28 am »
The National Organization of Women has named Letterman to their "Hall of Shame" -- that's an indication of how far he went.

http://www.now.org/issues/media/hall-of-shame/
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Offline serious crayons

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #3 on: June 12, 2009, 10:02:20 am »
Fortini articulates exactly what enraged and frustrated me so much about last year's election ugliness--enraging that it's still okay to undermine female power (provided the attack is packaged as righteous progressive indignation) by targeting her specifically female attributes, and frustrating as hell to see women doing it to other women. Letterman's dismissal of Gov. Palin as a "slutty flight attendant" type is the flip side of the right-wing dismissals of feminists as ugly women who couldn't get a man. The subtext is, she's too pretty (e.g., a bimbo) or too unattractive, and therefore, she's not one of those women who count. So it doesn't matter if respect is not paid, because disrespecting her isn't like disrespecting women who do count.
Hate to get all retro and Bennington-womyn's-studies and all, but disrespect to one is indeed, disrespect to all, and it's disappointing to see women of either political stripe not blow the whistle and call bullshit, but no, they're too busy pulling each other's hair and scratching each other's eyes out, leaving men to jeer on the sideliens and go on running everything as they always have . I wish I could remember (and Google was no help) the name of the Victorian whoo-zis who said of the early feminists that they had "forgotten how to be ladies and not yet learned to be gentlemen."

Hmm, I'd want to hear more about that whoo-zis before deciding to give that remark any credence. Comments about Victorian feminists forgetting "how to be ladies" were the equivalent of those about modern feminists' leg-shaving habits. Speaking of targeting specifically female attributes.

Remember that this piece was written by a woman, discussing insults made by men. So it's not so much about hair-pulling and eye-scratching as it is about speaking up about men who apparently haven't yet "learned to be gentlemen."

If I sound touchy, it's because the flip side was when, back in the bad old election days, liberal women who did what Fortini urges -- attack Palin's ideas rather than insult her as a woman -- were often accused of sexism. Saying a woman's ideas are dumb or that the woman is incompetent is not the same as saying that women are dumb and incompetent. Misunderstanding, or pretending to misunderstand, became such a handy little political weapon. And then again, sometimes liberal women undoubtedly did cross that line. The waters were easily muddied.


Offline louisev

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #4 on: June 12, 2009, 10:16:17 am »
 
ORLY?

Quote
Imagine if, say, Michelle Obama, or Rachel Maddow, or Nancy Pelosi became the target of similar invective. The outcry from the left would be deafening.

you mean like "angry black woman" (Obama) and that race-baiting hunt for her Princeton senior thesis?

Or "chirpy gay" (Maddow) ?

Or "Botox Nancy" Pelosi?

No no one ever ridiculed any of THEM and got a free pass...  /sarcasm off
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline Fran

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #5 on: June 12, 2009, 01:31:56 pm »
Everyone -- yes, even Rush Limbaugh -- should stop attacking/criticizing/making jokes at the expense of kids of politicians (and celebrities) until the kids are at least out of college.  It's hard enough being a regular kid these days.  It must be absolute hell to be a kid with a famous parent.  These kids can't help it that their parents are politicians (or celebrities).  They didn't choose their parents, and their lives shouldn't be scrutinized by the media just because they have famous parents.  And I bet we could all get by just fine without seeing the embarrassing gawky-teen photos or seeing the underage drinking photos or hearing about the mistakes kids often make on their way to adulthood.

Thanks for the first post, Katherine.

Offline Mikaela

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #6 on: June 12, 2009, 05:57:22 pm »
 
ORLY?

you mean like "angry black woman" (Obama) and that race-baiting hunt for her Princeton senior thesis?

Or "chirpy gay" (Maddow) ?

Or "Botox Nancy" Pelosi?

No no one ever ridiculed any of THEM and got a free pass...  /sarcasm off

And you're not even mentioning the ridicule that time and again has been directed at Hillary Clinton.

The difference to me is that Sarah Palin is so much better at playing the offended victim. And of course it comes across as more than a bit hollow to me, from a woman who used about every proverbial "womanly vile" in the book during her campaign when her lack of relevant competence and qualifications were demonstrated (overt flirting and faux ingenue eye-batting among them) and who herself readily stooped to very below-the-belt-type accusations (the "palling around with terrorists" comes to mind") - and who moreover IMO holds political views that are directly anti-womens' rights - the anti-choice stance for instance.

No, I'm *not* defending sexist comments directed at Palin or any other woman. I just don't think she's in a position to be so horribly offended. 

It more than anything strikes me as the pot calling the kettle black (if I got that expression right).

As a matter of fact, when it comes to political realities, I think the whole Letterman thing was more than anything a gift from above to her, because not only does it give her another 15 minutes of fame being seen to defend the moral high ground, but also she will no doubt use this matter endlessly as proof that absolutely all criticism of her - ever - on any subject and in any context - was in fact sexist.

Offline Shasta542

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #7 on: June 12, 2009, 06:01:22 pm »
I think she was mostly offended that he included her children in his crude remarks. Anyone who wouldn't be horribly offended about that wouldn't be much of a mother or father--IMO.
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Offline delalluvia

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #8 on: June 12, 2009, 11:36:57 pm »
I think she was mostly offended that he included her children in his crude remarks. Anyone who wouldn't be horribly offended about that wouldn't be much of a mother or father--IMO.

True, Palin has every right as a mother to get defensive about her daughter.

Then on the other hand, Letterman insists he meant Bristol, who Palin herself thought old enough and mature enough to make the decision to keep her child and to marry at 16-17 years of age.  Bristol is 18, she's an adult now and fair game and perfectly capable of defending herself.  She's definitely young, but not a child anymore.

Offline louisev

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #9 on: June 12, 2009, 11:51:38 pm »
 
Palin has a much bigger issue at hand right now - trying to justify the legislation to spend $26 billion dollars to build a natural gas pipeline from the North Slope  when natural gas sources in the lower 48 are shuttered due to the low price of natural gas.
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline delalluvia

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #10 on: June 13, 2009, 12:35:49 am »

Palin has a much bigger issue at hand right now - trying to justify the legislation to spend $26 billion dollars to build a natural gas pipeline from the North Slope  when natural gas sources in the lower 48 are shuttered due to the low price of natural gas.

So, tail wagging the dog?

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #11 on: June 13, 2009, 01:19:38 am »
True, Palin has every right as a mother to get defensive about her daughter.

Then on the other hand, Letterman insists he meant Bristol, who Palin herself thought old enough and mature enough to make the decision to keep her child and to marry at 16-17 years of age.  Bristol is 18, she's an adult now and fair game and perfectly capable of defending herself.  She's definitely young, but not a child anymore.

True, but joking about even an 18-year-old getting "knocked up" by a baseball player during the 7th-inning stretch is pretty classless. Heck, it would be classless if the daughter were 35.


Offline delalluvia

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #12 on: June 13, 2009, 10:47:53 am »
True, but joking about even an 18-year-old getting "knocked up" by a baseball player during the 7th-inning stretch is pretty classless. Heck, it would be classless if the daughter were 35.

Letterman is classless.  His humor has never been mistaken for high brow.

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #13 on: June 13, 2009, 11:13:31 am »
Letterman is classless.  His humor has never been mistaken for high brow.

No, but I might have characterized it as "intelligent frat boy" -- vs. unintelligent frat boy, as in much of SNL. The "knocked up" joke took intelligence out of the equation.


 

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #14 on: June 13, 2009, 02:15:11 pm »
Another entry in the Salon women's blog that reinforces my earlier point, about easily muddied waters:

Letterman and Palin: Both jerks!
The comedian's jokes about the Alaska governor and her daughter were out of line. So is her response.

Kate Harding

Jun. 12, 2009 |


We are through the looking glass, people. I actually kind of agree with Sarah Palin. Kind of. On the "Today" show this morning, she continued taking Letterman to task for his recent sexist remarks -- calling Palin "slutty" and making a crack about Alex Rodriguez knocking up an unnamed Palin daughter during a baseball game -- using language that was well nigh feminist. Regardless of any excuses Letterman has offered, she said, "It was a degrading comment about a young woman." Agreed. "It's a sad commentary on where we are as a culture, as a society," that people laugh at cheap, misogynistic jokes. Yep! Such jokes, as expressions of systematic sexism (which, OK, she didn't say), contribute to "the acceptance of abuse of young women." Yes, yes they do, actually. "I would hope that people really start -- really rising up and deciding it's not acceptable." Me too!

But, of course, she couldn't possibly quit while she was ahead.

The problem is, the daughter who attended the ballgame with her was 14-year-old Willow, but Letterman has stated the nasty joke was meant to be about 18-year-old Bristol. On his show Wednesday, Letterman said, "I can't really defend the joke, I agree, unpleasant, ugly, but I would never, never think that it was funny to use a 14-year-old girl as joke like this, for God's sake." There is no reason on earth to assume Letterman's lying about that -- Bristol, not Willow, has spent the last year being the poster child for teen pregnancy -- so naturally, that's exactly what Palin assumes. She called Matt Lauer "extremely naive" for taking Letterman's explanation of his genuine mistake (as opposed to his jerky behavior, which is a separate issue) at face value. Both she and her husband, Todd, have been framing this as a joke that makes light of statutory rape, as opposed to the mean-spirited, sexist, wholly inappropriate joke about an 18-year-old it actually was. Todd said in a statement yesterday, "Regardless of which Palin daughter it was, Bristol, Willow or Piper, these sexually perverted comments are outside the acceptance of mainstream America." Dude, what? Did you really just drag little Piper into this, too?

Therein lies the problem with trying to defend Sarah Palin from a feminist perspective. She and her daughters do not deserve sexist attacks any more than Hillary Clinton, Gloria Steinem or your mom do, and she's absolutely right that what Letterman said was out of line and indefensible. She's absolutely right that jokes like that contribute to an oppressive culture for women and young girls. But on this rare occasion when she's absolutely right about a couple of things, she can't just stop there. She has to blow straight past reasonable outrage and into disingenuous, over-the-top accusations.

Earlier this week, a Palin spokesperson said in a statement, "It would be wise to keep Willow away from David Letterman." When Lauer asked her about that, she said, "Hey, take it however you want to take it." OK, here's how I take it: You're implying that Letterman's a pedophile. Nice. See also: calling the jokes "sexually perverted," which they weren't, instead of "sexist and tasteless," which they were. So now here I am, inspired to defend Letterman from spurious attacks on his character, when I should be reinforcing the accurate attacks on his character in response to his spurious and sexist attacks on yours and your oldest daughter's. Why do you torment me so, Sarah Palin? Letterman said unequivocally offensive things, and he deserves to be condemned for them. But now, so have you, which complicates the matter of defending you as a fellow woman. Don't get me wrong; I will always denounce anyone who calls you a slut, or any other misogynistic slur. You don't deserve it, and that crap hurts all women. But if someone wants to call you a liar and a loon? You're on your own, lady.


Offline mariez

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #15 on: June 13, 2009, 02:47:11 pm »
Thanks, Katherine.  Those are both very well-written blog entries.  I think it was Cher who once went on Letterman's show and called him an a**hole, and I wouldn't disagree with that.  But a pedophile or someone who condones pedophilia?  Um, no.

Quote
But, of course, she couldn't possibly quit while she was ahead.

Of course not.  And so it goes ....
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline louisev

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #16 on: June 13, 2009, 02:53:10 pm »
I absolutely agree, Katherine.  I watched Letterman's 7 minute explanation - I dont think it was ever meant as an apology, nor do I think he called it an apology.  It was more of a clarifying reply and of course, an effort to keep digging at it.  Letterman is not a newsman, he's not a journalist.  He's a comedian.  And as he said - repeatedly - tasteless jokes are his stock in trade.  And he doesn't deny the tastelessness of any of his Palin jokes.  But if Palin thinks that Dave Letterman keeps a list of which daughters she brought to the ballgame and which ages they all are to make certain there isn't some inadvertent implication that he was joking about her 14 year old and not her adult daughter (after all, the entire joke hinged on the fact that Bristol was already, in fact, an adult, and already "knocked up" and that was the entire point of the joke in the first place - so CLEARLY he was talking about Bristol whether or not in actual fact she was the one accompanying Palin to the ball game.)   That is carrying the thing to levels of umbrage reserved only for those who are trying to make the entire thing about themselves.

And something tells me Letterman did it to flush her out.  He was determined to keep the focus on so that Palin would come out, sixguns blazing and overreact, thus making his point better.  It is hard to play straight man to Letterman, since he was joking to begin with.  It does remind me a lot of Joe Scarborough's reaction to Jon Stewart's segments about the "Morning Joe" show getting Starbucks endorsements.  Scarborough called Stewart "a very angry little man with a Napoleonic complex" thus opening the door to Stewart raising the ante and doing a sketch piece with a Napoleon outfit, a French accent suitable for Monty Python, and a very small white pony.  Clearly, Joe Scarborough is not going to get Stewart to really take him seriously or get offended by being called "little".  He knows how short he is, and he pokes fun at that all the time.

Letterman's laid his cards on the table with his tastelessness.  He hasn't been any more tasteless with Sarah Palin than he has been with any other targets of his barbed satire.  It's a no-win for Palin, though.  And they said liberals were humorless!
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline delalluvia

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Palin flap may help Letterman ratings
« Reply #17 on: June 13, 2009, 11:52:44 pm »

The story had the effect of turning the attention to Letterman at a critical time, during the second week of his new competition with Leno's replacement, Conan O'Brien.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090614/ap_en_ot/us_tv_letterman

Offline louisev

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #18 on: June 13, 2009, 11:56:50 pm »
Letterman is all about the ratings.

And in fact, he should have hit on this schtick earlier, because as SNL showed, Sarah Palin is comedy gold.
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #19 on: June 14, 2009, 04:22:48 pm »
    Well the truth is I do see everyones point here.  However, It is an odd thing that the NOW, org. supposed the standard
bearer for women.  Never uttered a single syllable when Janet Reno, Hillary Clinton, and former secretaries of state Condoleza Rice and Madalyn Albright were being summarily degraded with worse words and denegrations.  Why now, why with Mrs Palin?  It seems to me that the right wing of politic, has longer arms, than do the left side.  Especially when it comes to controversy.
Remember the Bill Maher incident, and dismissal?



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Offline Shasta542

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #20 on: June 14, 2009, 06:27:26 pm »
Maybe N.O.W. is against people using children that way. The public figures -- maybe they consider them fair game.
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Offline serious crayons

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Re: Making sexist (and classist) jokes about conservative women
« Reply #21 on: June 18, 2009, 12:16:06 pm »
An article from Slate about the issue:

http://www.slate.com/id/2220710/
 
Dirty Jokes
What kidding around about sexual predators and innocent teens says about us. And them.
By Dahlia LithwickPosted Wednesday, June 17, 2009, at 7:50 PM ET


Anyone who's been scoring Letterman v. Palin knows that it has been a ratings boon to both sides: Last week, David Letterman told a tasteless joke. Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin flipped out. Letterman apologized. Palin went berserk. Letterman apologized again. Palin accepted his apology on behalf of "young women" everywhere. Letterman's ratings skyrocketed. And Palin is back in the headlines. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

The pertinent facts: During his monologue on June 8, Letterman called Palin a "slutty flight attendant" and joked about Palin's daughter being propositioned by former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer and "knocked up" by Alex Rodriguez during a Yankees game. Letterman later insisted the joke was about 18-year-old teen mom Bristol, but the young Palin in attendance at Yankee Stadium that night was 14-year-old Willow, allowing her mom to rage that the late-night talk-show host was contributing to a culture "that says it's OK to talk about statutory rape" and offer up a counterjoke that "it would be wise to keep Willow away from David Letterman."

So what's more offensive, the joke about impregnating teenage girls or the joke about sexually predatory old comedians? Answer: neither.

That's the problem with jokes. They are funny only if you accept the premise, in this case, that Palin is the slutty mother of sluts or that Letterman is a dirty old man with designs on 'tween girls. If you don't accept that premise, the jokes become cancerous hate speech. There's no middle ground here. That's why the umbrage wars invariably escalate when jokes are involved. Jokes—or more correctly, the enemies' jokes—seem to open a window on the other team's id. One side's throwaway one-liner is the other side's heart of darkness.

It's easy to view this whole Palin/Letterman dust-up through the lens of political opportunism: As Kevin Drum remarks, Palin "was just looking for some free publicity, and getting her supporters worked up over a supposed insult from a dissolute member of the East Coast liberal elite played directly into her standard class resentment schtick." Columnist Mike Littwin calls it "a faux-culture-war story that falls somewhere between sublime and ridiculous, which is exactly where we need a headline-grabbing, culture-war story to land." But while I agree that Letterman's comments were stupid and Palin's were probably stupider, I don't believe the umbrage on either side was phony. I suspect each side believes it caught out the enemy in a moment of profound moral truth.
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That's why the real point of this newest umbrage war is not whether Letterman joked about the 14-year-old or the 18-year-old daughter (NOW finds both outrageous), whether the "slutty flight attendant" line was sexist (Michelle Malkin is beside herself), or whether Palin is a hypocrite for smiling last fall as SNL offered up far more offensive jokes about her children. The point of the umbrage wars is that both sides insist that the other side is getting away with something. Both sides think that there is a double standard at work here that makes its jokes funny while the enemy spews toxic, dangerous hate.

It's not a joke, says Palin, if it contributes to a culture that treats young girls as sex objects. It's not a joke, say her critics, that Palin is accusing Letterman of the imaginary rape of her teenage child.

Palin herself has long argued that her jokes are benign, whereas her enemies' jokes are threats to her family. In her June 12 interview with Matt Lauer, Palin (while, er, calling Letterman a pedophile) complained that the Obama children are cosseted while hers are trashed and violated:

    It's the double standard that's been applied here. ... Remember in the campaign, Barack Obama said "Family's off limits. You don't talk about my family," and "the candidate who must be obeyed" [Obama] ... everybody adhered to that, and they did leave his family alone, and they haven't done that on the other side of the ticket, and it has continued to this day. So that's a political double standard.

To which Margaret Carlson replies that "if you want a 'zone of privacy' around your daughter, do you have her appear on stage with her then-fiancé hinting at prospects of a White House wedding waving to the crowd like Charles and Diana of the Klondike?"

Both sides also suspect that there is a double standard for comedians—that one side is allowed to speak freely while the other is muzzled by politically correct hecklers. Here, for instance, is columnist Pam Meister explaining why Letterman got a pass on Palin while Don Imus was canned for calling the Rutgers woman's basketball team "nappy-headed hos."

    The reason, of course, is that an old white guy making any kind of slur against a protected minority group is verboten. But an old liberal white guy making crude sexual jokes about the young daughter of a conservative politician is fine, because who the hell cares what those knuckle-dragging conservatives think? Considering the relative paucity of criticism from like thinkers on the left, who would have been up in arms had a similar joke been made about Obama's children (heaven forbid, I might add), is telling.

Liberals, on the other hand, contend that they are the ones held to a higher standard than the Bill O'Reillys and Glenn Becks, who spew hate like the fountain at Caesar's Palace but who are never called on to apologize, as Letterman just did twice.

Maybe the real problem here is not the double standard, or the perceived double standard, or even the fact that two double standards should ultimately net out into a single unitary standard. Perhaps the hard question we cannot quite answer is whether we want our jokes, slips, and gaffes to be considered mere jokes, or to reveal something deep about character.

Sigmund Freud certainly believed the latter. In his 1905 book The Joke and Its Relation to the Unconscious, he speculated that jokes, like dreams, are like letters from the subconscious and that, like dreams, they express unspoken wishes and desires. He theorized that often—in the case of what he terms "tendentious jokes"—jokes allow us to bypass cultural repression and scratch some deep psychological itch. Freud speculates that dirty jokes are a form of safe sexual aggression—a kind of safe threesome—and that "hostile jokes" are those that "allow us to exploit something ridiculous in our enemy which we could not, on account of obstacles in the way, bring forward openly or consciously." Hostile jokes, according to Freud, also bring the listeners who enjoy our joke to our team. If Freud were alive today, he'd give both Letterman and Palin perfect scores in each of these categories for their most recent efforts.

I would be remiss if I didn't add that The Joke and Its Relation to the Unconscious teems with the kind of sexist humor that makes Letterman's foray into dirty jokes about sex with Alaskan teens seem tame by comparison. But the enduring point Freud would argue is that one guy's "just a joke" is a sucker punch to someone else's id. We can't ever resolve the question of when "just kidding" becomes bilious psychopathology, because jokes will never fit neatly into just one category or the other. Freud also has a lot to say about the differences between the intent of the jokester and the perception of the listener, something Letterman learned the hard way this week. But in the end, we may be forever doomed to read more into jokes than we do into other types of declarations precisely because jokes originate from—and are directed to—that part of us with no real sense of humor.

Were Freud alive today, he would also tell you that it's no accident the Letterman-Palin fracas ultimately bogged down in mutual self-righteous claims that jokes about sex with so-and-so are simply never funny. But, then, Freud would also be the first to insist that's why these are the funniest jokes of all.