The Thanksgiving Bombshell

[shortfiction]

So....everything was going along okay until one of my nieces, who is 19 and has no job, announced that she plans to marry her boyfriend, who lives  in another state, and wanted to see if he could live in my home for a while until he gets a job here and they save up enough $ to get their own place.
 
Ummmm.......my mom lives here too.  And we have no bedroom to spare.   And he would have nothing to contribute in terms of money.  And she lives more than an hour's drive away.   Her folks don't want him to live in their home until the wedding takes place.   

I went outside for a while.  Threw up a bit in my mouth. Had a drink.   Ranted to a friend on the cell phone.   Went back in and we all tried to talk some sense into the girl.   

And, uh, how was YOUR Thanksgiving?

[Shakesthecoffecan]

I would tell her "No, and in a few years you will understand why so I won't bother going into an explanation."

Don't you just love hollidaze.....

[Ellemeno]

They're 19, they can do what they want, hunh.  Just not in someone else's house.

[delalluvia]

I always love it how relatives are always quick to volunteer you to do something for them with no consideration whatsoever to the burden it puts on you.

Yeah, I wouldn't have even had to think about it before I said no.  At least you gave her that consideration.

[Ellemeno]

One time we agreed a woman could stay with us for three days while she looked for a place.  On the third day she sweared she missed the "three day" part, and we agreed to let her stay longer.  Funny thing was, six weeks later, when I was in a scary car accident near my house, she was the one who I was able to call to quickly come get me.  I am forever grateful for that.  And she did move out, long ago.  We wonder where she is.

[Front-Ranger]

Nice Brokeism, Elle!

The idea that you would accept a strange jobless 19-year-old man into your home with your mother there is as hare-brained as they come. It should be very easy to discard this and help her work through some better options. They could marry right away and live in their parent's house. The man could get a loan to finance his move or get a job in your town or the place where he currently lives, and save money for their own place. There are terrific tax incentives right now for first time home buyers. The couple needs to learn right away that you have to earn your place in this world, not mooch off relatives.

[Kelda]

eek! 

[Ellemeno]

One time we agreed a woman could stay with us for three days while she looked for a place.  On the third day she sweared she missed the "three day" part, and we agreed to let her stay longer.  Funny thing was, six weeks later, when I was in a scary car accident near my house, she was the one who I was able to call to quickly come get me.  I am forever grateful for that.  And she did move out, long ago.  We wonder where she is.

Sweared?  Sorry, I meant 'swore.'  That's weird, I totally know how to conjugate that.

[serious crayons]

Tell her you ain't set up for that.

[shortfiction]

For sure I ain't.

Yep...both of these young'uns have no idea how the real world works, but I think they're about to find out.

[CellarDweller]

That's just crazy!

How could they expect you to put up wth that?  Geez.

[shortfiction]

That's just crazy!

How could they expect you to put up wth that?  Geez.

The niece expects it because she's always gotten everything she demanded.   

[tango]

The niece expects it because she's always gotten everything she demanded.   

Well then I guess you gave her a first taste in learning how the real world works.  And a girl who is used to getting everything she demands is going to be sorely disapointed in a husband who can't afford to continue that pattern.  I expect it will not be a long and happy marriage. 

[shortfiction]

Another concern is that they may end up with a baby and the grandparents will be stuck raising it.   The fact that both 19 year olds are fairly religious does not guarantee that there will be no baby.