Author Topic: Bully  (Read 19747 times)

Offline milomorris

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Bully
« on: March 08, 2012, 04:23:12 pm »
Well, it looks like the Gay Party has done something else that I am more than happy to support. There is a documentary titled Bully being released on March 30, 2012. As the title would suggest, it examines bullies, their targets, the parents and others who love and support each. The problem that the HRC is working to solve is that the movie has been given an R rating, which puts it out of reach for many of the children--both the bullies and the targets--who would benefit from seeing it.

I found out about this from a college professor buddy of mine via facebook. The HRC has a letter-writing campaign going here:

https://secure3.convio.net/hrc/site/Advocacy?cmd=display&page=UserAction&id=1375

I don't particularly like the way the HRC letter is worded, so I wrote my own and sent it.

I know that I'm a pain in the ass to many of you here at Bettermost, and that's not likely to change. But I think this a worthy cause to support, and I hope you can look past our differences, and hopefully agree with me...this time.

http://thebullyproject.com
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

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Offline Penthesilea

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Re: Bully
« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2012, 03:25:13 am »
It's a shame and an irony that this documentary received a R rating.
Since the site has an option for people from non US countries, I signed.

Offline Lynne

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Re: Bully
« Reply #2 on: March 09, 2012, 07:44:35 am »
Thank you for bringing this to my attention, Milo.  I sent a letter and posted it to my FB wall too.

As an aside, for these on-line petitions, I almost always at least edit the letter being sent, if not completely re-write it, because I think it's important to make it personal and to let the person/company know WHY the issue matters to me.

Lynne
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Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #3 on: March 09, 2012, 01:02:07 pm »
To add to the discussion:

http://news.moviefone.com/michael-tucker/bully-r-rating_b_1333649.html

It's Time That We Rethink How We Rate Movies
Michael Tucker, Filmmaker
Posted: 03/ 8/2012 10:06 pm

When I first heard that the Weinstein Company had lost its appeal to overturn the R rating that the MPAA had given to Lee Hirsch's film Bully, I was taken back to 2005 when we opted for an appeal for our Iraq War film Gunner Palace after it also received an R for language. At the time, the war was raging in Iraq, young people were dying every day, coverage of the war was in decline and we thought it was imperative that high school students have access -- unrestricted -- to a film that could help them relate to the conflict. An R rating would make that impossible, not just in the immediate, but also in the future, because few school districts purchase R rated films for their libraries.

So, I flew out to Hollywood with Andy Robbins who ran marketing for our distributor and screened the movie for the appeals board -- which consisted of a juror of a dozen industry representatives and a priest. After they watched the film, we presented our case, Joan Graves from CARA made a rebuttal and we were allowed to close our arguments. As I said my final remarks -- fighting back emotion -- I felt like we were defending not just a film, but an experience, one that the young soldiers in the film lived and we had captured. The language in the film wasn't gratuitous, it was unfiltered reality and if it was offensive, then I reminded the board that war is the greatest profanity of them all.

When we were finished, Andy I were taken to a holding area while the board tallied their votes. An assistant came back a short time later and said the vote was (I believe) 9 to 3. Joan Graves consoled us, as if to say, "Better luck next time fellas." The assistant then said,"No, Joan, they won."

We were elated and thanked the board -- in our eyes, they had done their job that day, which is to say, rules will be challenged and it's imperative that a body that claims to safeguard the community standards of a nation be aware of the currents in that community. The film was released, the MPAA was not bombarded with letters from pressure groups and the film now sits on the shelves of most school libraries. A few years later I was asked about the appeal and in retrospect, it occurred to me how difficult it is to rate reality. Is the little girl running down the street -- burnt by Napalm -- in Nick Ut's famous photograph a PG or an R? What about Buchenwald? Or Abu Ghraib? Are those NC17? When does the public good outweigh the pressure to censor and restrict access to images and words?

Fast forward seven years, as a filmmaker and as the parent of a sixteen year old girl, I'm hugely disappointed that the MPAA upheld the R rating of Bully -- one originally given for six uses of the F-word or variations of it. In the eyes of the MPAA, once you pass two F-Bombs, you automatically have an R. Never mind that in one of the scenes where the F-word is used, a boy is bullied on a school bus by an older boy who also tells the younger that he's going to cut him and assault him with a broom handle. Watching this -- and many scenes in the film -- you often forget that you are in a middle school and not in a prison yard. These are ugly real threats and the escalation and use of language is essential to the film. At it's heart, "Bully" is about the power of words. To understand what these kids are really experiencing you have to hear the language. Editing or bleeping would be an insult to that experience. But the MPAA is not worried about that or the best interests of kids, rather, they are worried about angry pressure groups and commentators, the same sort of people who, ironically, love to throw around words like slut at their enemies.

I thought we were beyond this as a culture -- especially after our appeal -- but it seems that Joan Graves and the MPAA will always have one foot firmly planted in the '50s, a time when the F-word and Allen Ginsberg were threats to their way of life. It's about time that we rethink how we rate movies.

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Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #4 on: March 09, 2012, 04:20:07 pm »
Thanks for posting this article, Mandy. I will hopefully have some time to participate in my local school board meetings, and I would most certainly be among those pressuring the board to ignore the ratings and look at the benefits of the content of Bully, and other movies.
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Bully
« Reply #5 on: March 13, 2012, 09:03:38 am »
Signed, posted on Facebook and tweeted.




Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #6 on: March 13, 2012, 11:56:21 am »
Signed, posted on Facebook and tweeted.

Cool!!

I've got to start tweeting. When I first signed up, the only person in my contacts that has an account was my boss. So I've ignored twitter for the last 2-3 years.
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Bully
« Reply #7 on: March 13, 2012, 07:02:20 pm »
Cool!!

I've got to start tweeting. When I first signed up, the only person in my contacts that has an account was my boss. So I've ignored twitter for the last 2-3 years.

I did too, though I found later that I had ignored it at my peril -- missed the chance to use it for some professional promotional opportunities that would have been helpful. However, it's a serious time suck -- not just the site itself but, for me, its consequences.  Most of the people I follow are writers, and they're constantly recommending articles and essays, and pretty soon my browser is full of tabs that it would take me a month to read. So I only go there maybe once a week and treat it like a cocktail party where I hear a few conversations here and there but could never take completely in.

I'm not sure it's all that useful for people who don't have self-promotion or networking requirements, except maybe for the chance to see what public figures you like are doing, reading, thinking, joking about. I'm not interested in Lady Gaga and Charlie Sheen, but for following prominent writers and making potential professional contacts it's helpful.







Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #8 on: March 16, 2012, 09:20:41 am »
http://news.yahoo.com/bully-documentary-could-hit-theaters-without-rating-021146101.html


"Bully" documentary could hit theaters without rating
By Susan Heavey | Reuters – 10 hrs ago

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - A new documentary film about bullying set for theaters this month could come out unrated after objections from teenaged victims, celebrities, members of Congress and others over its restrictive rating by a Hollywood studio group.

The head of the Motion Picture Association of America said on Thursday there were several options to get around the "R" rating that would prevent people under 17-year-old from seeing the film in the United States without a parent, including releasing it without a rating.

"There are ways of doing this," said MPAA chairman Chris Dodd during an emotional debate after a screening at the group's Washington office. "One, they don't have to be rated."

Dodd added: "My hope is we can find some way to work through this."

"Bully," set for release starting March 30, has drawn controversy over the MPAA's rating. Opponents of the group's decision say many youth need to see the film in order to tackle the problem of bullying, and its "R" rating will prevent kids from seeing it not only in theaters but also in schools.

The MPAA, which represents Hollywood's major movie studios in governmental matters, rates films for content such as sex, violence and language to give audiences an idea of what will be in the movies they see.

In the case of "Bully," the movie was given its restrictive "R" rating due to foul language. The director, so far, has declined to change the movie, arguing the language is essential to the story. The MPAA has refused to budge, too.

Harvey Weinstein, whose The Weinstein Co. is distributing the film, called Dodd's proposal of an unrated film a "lifeline" and said "unrated could give us the options that we want."

The special screening just two blocks from the White House drew emotional pleas from not only director Lee Hirsch, but also from a teenaged victim and a parent who are featured in his movie, as well as another bullied teenager who started an online petition to fight the rating.

"Our reality is not censored," said Kelby Johnson, a 16-year-old from Oklahoma featured in the documentary. She said she was called worse names than those heard in the movie when she went to school, on the bus or at the mall.

"Since when did curse words become more important than our children's lives?" she asked Dodd.

David Long, a father from Georgia whose son Tyler Long hanged himself in 2009 at age 17 after years of being bullied, also called on Dodd to take action.

"We take a step back" if communities don't show the movie because of the rating, said Long.

Weinstein said his company had been planning to have thousands children bussed from schools into theaters to see the film - a plan that has become complicated after the "R" rating. Schools can still show the movie, but school boards would likely require each child to have the approval of a parent.

Dodd, the former U.S. senator from Connecticut who is known for his work on children's issues, said he did not want the ratings controversy to overshadow the film's important message.

But that is exactly what is happening, argued Hirsch, who pressed Dodd to not only address his film's rating but what he called a broken system that allowed films with more graphic violence to get less restrictive PG-13 ratings that allows kids under 17 to see a film without parental supervision.

Victims of bullying already feel like their voices aren't heard, Hirsch said. They are moved by the film's message and want others to see it, he added. "Don't let them down."

(Reporting By Susan Heavey; Editing by Bob Tourtellotte)

..
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Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #9 on: March 16, 2012, 05:20:46 pm »


"Bully" documentary could hit theaters without rating

That's a big improvement.
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Bully
« Reply #10 on: March 16, 2012, 09:34:35 pm »
That's a big improvement.

Maybe not, if it puts "Bully" in NC-17 territory.



Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #11 on: March 16, 2012, 09:49:13 pm »
Maybe not, if it puts "Bully" in NC-17 territory.




I thought "not rated" left things open. Is it possible to acquire a rating of NC-17 after a "not rated" release?
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #12 on: March 17, 2012, 08:36:34 am »
From what I've read of these and other articles, "Not Rated" means just that.  It would be released with no official rating specifying or limiting viewership.
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Offline serious crayons

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Re: Bully
« Reply #13 on: March 17, 2012, 11:24:43 am »
Oh, I may have read it wrong. Somewhere I thought I saw that schools would balk at showing unrated movies, as well, thinking unrated can be an indication of adultish content. But now I see that Weinstein thinks that could be a good solution, so I may have misunderstood.


Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #14 on: March 17, 2012, 03:27:43 pm »
Oh, I may have read it wrong. Somewhere I thought I saw that schools would balk at showing unrated movies, as well, thinking unrated can be an indication of adultish content.

No. You're right. Some schools will keep their hands off an unrated movie. I just think that the number of schools that do so will be fewer with "unrated," than "R."
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #15 on: March 27, 2012, 11:01:48 am »
From this article yesterday, it sounds like it will be the theater's decision to admit or not admit.  Hmm...  Perhaps the limited release Friday will set some precedents before it goes nationwide.

'Bully' stands up to MPAA with unrated release
March 26, 2012, 5:02 PM EST
Entertainment Tonight

Following a close-but-no-cigar R-rating battle with the MPAA, Weinstein Company Co-Chairman Harvey Weinstein will release his new documentary, "Bully," unrated in theaters on March 30.

The unflinching and emotional documentary, flagged with an R rating for language that has been deemed inappropriate by the Motion Picture Association of America for anyone under the age of 17, has been the subject of debate since Weinstein challenged the organization's influential ratings decision, declaring the film too important to be missed by its target audience: children.

But despite an outpouring of support and petitions by schools, parents, celebrities and politicians, the film failed to get a PG-13 rating by just one vote, preventing the film from being screened in schools as an educational tool and making it that much more difficult for much of its crucial audience demographic to see it.

"The small amount of language in the film that's responsible for the R rating is there because it's real," says director Lee Hirsch. "It's what the children who are victims of bullying face on most days. All of our supporters see that, and we're grateful for the support we've received across the board. I know the kids will come, so it's up to the theaters to let them in."

The unrated "Bully" will start with a limited release on March 30 in New York at the Angelika Film Center and AMC Lincoln Square and in Los Angeles at The Landmark, ArcLight Hollywood and AMC Century City.

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Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #16 on: March 27, 2012, 12:37:14 pm »
I just heard on the radio that Bully be unrated when it comes to Philadelphia too. We also have a member of city council who is working in favor of the film getting as much exposure as possible.
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #17 on: March 29, 2012, 10:04:18 am »
http://news.yahoo.com/one-bully-theaters-bigger-bullies-184746466.html

One 'Bully' in theaters, but bigger bullies on Web
By Zorianna Kit | Reuters – 14 hrs ago

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - New film documentary "Bully" has made big headlines in recent weeks over its U.S. film rating, but larger than the topic of who can see the movie is bullying itself and its spread due in part to social networking and technology.

Bullying has existed for centuries and likely dates back to the dawn of mankind. But in recent years, speaking out against it has become a rallying cry for parents, educators and celebrities from Ellen DeGeneres to Lady Gaga. The 2010 suicide of gay college student Tyler Clementi was just one high-profile case that struck a chord with many people.

"Bully," which opens on Friday and was directed by Lee Hirsch, follows five kids and families over one school year, looking at the issue and how it has impacted their lives. Stories include two families in which kids have committed suicide and one mother awaiting the fate of her 14-year-old daughter who was jailed for bringing a gun on a school bus.

While the extreme outcome of bullying is suicide, as in the case of Clementi, other effects include the loss of self-esteem, troubled relationships, depression and self mutilation.

The movie reaches theaters after stirring a controversy over its initial rating that restricted people under 17-years-old from seeing it without a parent. It is now being released unrated. But beyond the rating, bullying is a growing problem in part because technology has given today's youth more ways than ever to torment others, experts said.

Using cell phones and computers, kids send immediate, nasty messages via texts or posts on social media websites. And many experts see the Internet as a new school playground where kids gather to share information, post pictures and trade gossip.

"Today, bullying is 24/7," Ross Ellis, founder and chief executive officer of STOMP Out Bullying told Reuters. "It's at school, you go home and it's on the Internet. It's there all the time."

Julie Hertzog, director of parental training group Pacer's National Bullying Prevention Center noted a direct correlation between what's happening at school and online.

"They're not exclusive to each other - they're happening synonymously and heightening the experience," she said.

Currently, one out of four kids is bullied and as many as 160,000 students stay home from school on any given day because they are afraid of facing their bully. Each month 282,000 students in U.S. secondary schools are physically attacked, according to STOMP out Bullying.

When it comes to cyberbullying, 43 percent of teens and 97 percent of middle schoolers say they have experienced it. Fifty-eight percent of them do not report it to an adult, according to the STOMP out Bullying group.

EDUCATION AND TECHNOLOGY

Ironically, however, education, technology and the Web may be the very things that can have a hand in diminishing bullying, said "Bully" director Hirsch and others.

"When I was a kid, when a teenager committed suicide, the connection wasn't drawn to bullying," the 39-year-old filmmaker said. "Now we learn very quickly in the wake of these tragedies because kids will go on Facebook and start writing about what was happening."

Dr. Joel Leibowitz, an L.A. based psychologist who deals with children, teens and issues involving bullying, told Reuters that parents, teachers and administrators no longer can risk the belief that bullying is a rite of passage or that kids will work out problems among themselves. And he thinks the public's attitude toward bullying is starting to change.

"Educators and professional are now aware that there are serious, long-term consequences to bullying," he told Reuters. "It's considered to be a trauma, so you can think of post-traumatic stress disorder as a consequence of bullying. That can really be a problem for individuals and for society."

Hertzog believes the documentary "Bully" could help be a catalyst for change, calling it "an amazing opportunity for dialogue" while Liebowitz feels it can "bring people to a greater sense of awareness" about the issue.

Director Hirsch is hopeful, too.

"I actually think we're on the cusp of a profound tipping point towards the positive," he said. "People are talking about it and that's meaningful. That's how change happens."

Liebowitz said there will always be some element of bullying in society because it is human nature for some people to be bullies and others to feel bullied. But, he added, the behavior can be moderated through education.

"Kids can be taught to learn how to deal with their feelings and not have to act upon them," he said. "That would translate to future generations learning from those who have been taught in this generation."

(Reporting By Zorianna Kit; Editing by Bob Tourtellotte and Jill Serjeant)

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Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #18 on: March 29, 2012, 10:19:21 am »
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marlo-thomas/bully_b_1382354.html

Marlo Thomas
Award-winning actress, author, and activist

Bully: The Year's Most Important Film
Posted: 03/29/2012 8:39 am


I'm not a movie reviewer, but I strongly recommend that you take your child by the hand this weekend -- or several children -- to see the new documentary film, Bully. The only problem is, you might not be able to find the film at your neighborhood cineplex. That's because the Motion Picture Association of America has stamped the film "Unrated," after a long and noisy battle over its original R-rating. So now it is up to the individual theatre owners to decide whether or not they will exhibit Bully. I urge them to do so.

But make no mistake, even if you have to drive your kids across state lines to see the film, your kids need to be in the audience -- because, whether you know it or not, they may be among the 13 million American children affected by bullying every year. For them, this is more than just a movie. It is real life.

And in this real life, parents have been all but invisible -- invisible in the school cafeteria, invisible on the playground, invisible on the school bus and online -- unwittingly abandoning their children to face this torment alone. The film makes this painfully clear, whether it's the dad who confidently recites that timeworn rationalization about bullying -- "Kids will be kids" -- or the school administrator who blindly insists to a worried parent that her students are "good as gold on that school bus" -- intercut with a clip of a small boy being choked on that very bus. We come away from Bully feeling defeated and enraged.

Interestingly, the MPAA's controversial decision about the film's rating -- based on its use of profanity and other violent language -- could end up working in the children's favor. Research indicates that bullied kids are not comfortable revealing their dangerous predicaments to their parents. But now that the rating has forced kids to see the film with an adult, the movie can do the revealing for them. And children will at last feel their parents there, by their side, seeing and understanding what it's like to leave their house and wander unprotected into a scary world.

Adults may be horrified by what they see in Bully, but the kids know this world all too well. Directed by Lee Hirsch, the film captures the wrenching drama of schoolyard bullying -- the hitting and harassing, the tormenting and tears, the grave suffering -- in unflinching detail, as it zooms in on the daily battles waged by five bullied children, two of whom ultimately commit suicide. But sitting through the film will be worth every harrowing minute, especially to the children, whose only hope against this ever deepening crisis is the visible and vocal support of the adults in their lives.

The MPAA's decision has incited a storm of protest. When Bully was first given an R-rating, a 17-year-old Michigan high-schooler, Katy Butler -- who has been bullied herself -- posted a petition on Change.org, demanding that the MPAA change the rating. When such high-profile and conscientious activists as Meryl Streep and Johnny Depp joined in the protest, the MPAA was effectively arm-twisted into changing the movie's rating to a still restrictive "Unrated."

But while all of this debate continues, the sad fact is: children are still dying at the hands of bullying.

This is why I am urging all adults -- parents, guardians, caregivers -- to take your kids to see Bully this weekend. I also encourage educators and school administrators to arrange school-wide field trips. Because if there's one thing we've learned since launching our anti-bullying campaign last year -- with the Ad Council, the Department of Education and funders like AOL, Facebook, the Waitt Family Foundation and the Free To Be Foundation (who have been major funders of the Bully Project) -- it's that, if we are ever to eradicate this deadly, modern-day scourge, we need to face the problem head-on -- and together.
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Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #19 on: March 31, 2012, 08:37:40 am »
http://news.yahoo.com/bully-director-says-never-meant-r-film-232319151.html

"Bully" director says never meant to make "R" film
By Zorianna Kit | Reuters – 12 hrs ago

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Documentary filmmaker Lee Hirsch spent a year at three schools in Sioux City, Iowa, following five kids and families who have been impacted by bullying for his nonfiction movie "Bully."

The film, which opens in select theaters on Friday, has made headlines in recent weeks for receiving an "R" rating from a movie industry group for language, namely for multiple uses of one particular curse word. In the United States, an "R" means kids under 17-years-old must be accompanied by an adult.

After failing to get the rating changed to one that is less restrictive, distributor The Weinstein Co. decided to release "Bully" without a rating. That, in itself, could limit audiences because some theater chains won't screen films without a rating.

As the release date neared, however, AMC Theatres decided to allow kids as long as they have parental approval, and Regal Cinemas and Carmike Cinemas will show it, too, but under the same restrictions as if it were rated "R".

Reuters spoke with Hirsch recently about the controversy surrounding the rating - he and others complain it bars the young audience for whom the movie is meant - as well as the subject matter and the filmmaker's own experience with bullying.

Q: When you were shooting the documentary, did you know you were making an R-rated film?

A: "No, I didn't. Never in a million years did I think we would have an R-rated movie. The spirit of it never felt R-rated. We set out to show what really happens, what these kids go through and what bullying looks like. (The curse words) are incredibly meaningful in the context of the film. Language carries power. That's how bullying takes place."

Q: Do you think that because you also subtitled the objected words, the visual of seeing them on the big screen made it seem more prominent to the Motion Picture Association of America?

A: "We chose to subtitle it because the audio was garbled, and you couldn't see (the bully) saying it. It's actually not very easy to understand what's being said. We needed the subtitles."

Q: Did you consider putting sounds over the swear words to block them from being heard?

A: "Of course we considered it. My feeling is that language matters. (Victims of bullying) are constantly having their stories minimized. Sort of like, 'Oh it's not so bad.' Having been bullied, I can relate to that. A big piece of this film was to kill that argument, to show that it is bad, it's mean, it's scary and it's serious, so serious that kids are being driven to suicide. So for all those reasons, in this context, it matters. We're holding our ground because it matters."

Q: Do you worry that some may find the film underwhelming because the "R" rating earned so much media coverage that the reality of seeing how the word is used is a bit of a let down?

A: "That's happened a lot. People see it and say, 'What's the problem?' Those who haven't seen it have said, 'Oh, this film has so much profanity, I'm afraid I can't take my family to see it.' The reality is there are six uses of the F-word. But there's probably four that are even really for real. One of them is while (a victim) Alex is being choked."

Q: The film focuses on the victims, not on the perpetrators. Was that done on purpose?

A: "I felt like the perspective of this film was to walk in the shoes of these families and kids. That's the point of view of the film. That was where my comfort level was narratively. For me, the film lived these verite moments of what these families go through."

Q: Did you ever feel compelled to follow the lives of one of the bullies, to show viewers what their personal life was like?

A: "Maybe that'll be for 'Part 2' (laughs). The truth is, it was difficult. What I can share is that the beating of Alex on the bus - we had to go back and get signed release forms from every single family from the kids that bullied him. If you notice in the film, only one face is blurred. So we had those conversations. A number of the families had never been made aware that the incident even happened. The families were really upset. There were tears. But they agreed to sign releases, which was extraordinary."

Q: It's astonishing to see kids beating Alex up in full view of the camera. Did you use a hidden camera to capture it?

A: "It was not a hidden camera. They were aware that I was there. But I'd been in that school (filming) for almost a year. We stopped being interesting (to students) on week two. They were just kind of doing their own thing. On some level, they felt they had license to bully him because they'd been able to do it for so long."

Q: You offered no statistics about bullying, about how bad it is in society, or its long-term consequences. Why?

A: "The minute you start putting experts and charts and graphs and solutions, to me it kills the opportunity for people to arrive at a choice to change on their own. The film ends and the conversation begins. Of course, I didn't always know that. I shot experts because I was insecure. But once we knew we had a story, then we found our voice with the film."

Q: You experienced bullying growing up. Have people from your past come forth at all?

A: "I left the town I grew up in during middle school and I've reconnected with a lot of those kids because of this film. Some that had been cruel, some that had not, and some that had been in the middle. Some have donated significantly toward making the film. I've also connected with other kids that were bullied who I grew up with. They've reached out and said, 'thank you.'"

(Reporting By Zorianna Kit)
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Offline Aloysius J. Gleek

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Re: Bully
« Reply #20 on: March 31, 2012, 08:53:28 am »

http://movies.nytimes.com/2012/03/30/movies/bully-a-documentary-by-lee-hirsch.html



Movie Review
NYT Critics' Pick
Behind Every Harassed Child?
A Whole Lot of Clueless Adults

‘Bully,’ a Documentary by Lee Hirsch

By A. O. SCOTT
Published: March 29, 2012



Alex is one of the subjects of the documentary "Bully," directed by Lee Hirsch.


“Bully,” Lee Hirsch’s moving and troubling documentary about the misery some children inflict upon others, arrives at a moment when bullying, long tolerated as a fact of life, is being redefined as a social problem. “Just kids being kids” can no longer be an acceptable response to the kind of sustained physical and emotional abuse that damages the lives of young people whose only sin is appearing weak or weird to their peers.

And while the film focuses on the specific struggles of five families in four states, it is also about — and part of — the emergence of a movement. It documents a shift in consciousness of the kind that occurs when isolated, oppressed individuals discover that they are not alone and begin the difficult work of altering intolerable conditions widely regarded as normal.

The feeling of aloneness is one of the most painful consequences of bullying. It is also, in some ways, a cause of it, since it is almost always socially isolated children (the new kid, the fat kid, the gay kid, the strange kid) who are singled out for mistreatment. For some reason — for any number of reasons that hover unspoken around the edges of Mr. Hirsch’s inquiry — adults often fail to protect their vulnerable charges.

Alex, a 14-year-old in Sioux City, Iowa, whose daily routine includes being teased, humiliated and assaulted (especially on the school bus), cannot bear to tell his parents what is going on. He even sticks up for his tormenters, who he says are “just messing around” when they stab him with pencils and call him vile names.

“If not for them, what friends do I have?” he asks his distraught, confused mother.

It’s a heartbreaking moment. Equally sad — and also infuriating and painfully revealing — is a scene in which an assistant principal at Alex’s middle school tries to settle a conflict between two boys who apparently had been fighting at recess. When she insists that they shake hands, one eagerly obliges, with a smile and an apology. The other sullenly resists, and as she scolds him for his noncooperation (letting his antagonist go), it becomes clear that this boy is the victim, and that the assistant principal’s rushed attempt to be fair is in fact perpetuating a terrible and continuing injustice.

Later, after this same well-meaning, clueless educator has similarly mishandled a meeting with Alex’s parents — showing them pictures of her grandchildren; chirpily insisting that the bus where Alex has been terrorized is “good as gold” — Alex’s mother says “she politicianed us.”

There is more “politicianing” on display in “Bully” than actual bullying, though Mr. Hirsch’s camera does capture a few horrifying episodes (one of them so alarming that he shared it with parents and school officials). In spite of its title, the film is really about the victims, their parents and the powerful grown-ups who let them down.

A school superintendent in Georgia denies that bullying is a big problem in her district, in spite of the suicide of Tyler Long, a 17-year-old student who took his life after enduring years of harassment and ostracism. A sheriff in Yazoo County, Miss., tallies, with dry, bureaucratic relish, the 45 felony counts faced by Ja’Meya Jackson, a 14-year-old girl who pulled out a gun on a crowded school bus. Nothing can justify such a crime, he says.

That may be true, but his insistence on a narrow, legalistic understanding of Ja’Meya’s case betrays a profound lack of concern about the sustained and systematic abuse that she experienced at the hands of her schoolmates.

It gets worse. In a small town in Oklahoma, Ty Smalley’s suicide left behind loving parents and a devoted best friend, a self-described former bully whose insights are among the most accurate and devastating in the movie.

After Kelby Johnson, a high school student in another part of Oklahoma, came out as a lesbian, she and her family were shunned by neighbors and former friends, and Kelby was taunted by teachers as well as fellow students.

Mr. Hirsch weaves together these stories with compassion and tact, and he wisely refrains from making scapegoats of the bullies who cause Alex, Ja’Meya, Tyler, Ty and Kelby so much pain. “Bully” forces you to confront not the cruelty of specific children — who have their own problems, and their good sides as well — but rather the extent to which that cruelty is embedded in our schools and therefore in our society as a whole.

At times I found myself craving more analysis, a more explicit discussion of how the problem of bullying is connected to the broader issues of homophobia, education and violence in American life. But those issues are embedded in every story the film has to tell. Its primary intent is to stir feelings rather than to construct theories or make arguments, and its primary audience is not middle-aged intellectuals but middle-school students caught in the middle of the crisis it so powerfully illuminates.

But while we are on the subject of adult failures, it should be noted that the Motion Picture Association of America’s ratings board, by insisting on an R rating for “Bully,” has made it harder for young audiences to see. The Weinstein Company, which is distributing the film, has released it without a rating after the association denied its appeal and after a widely publicized petition drive was unable to change the board’s mind.

There is a little swearing in the movie, and a lot of upsetting stuff, but while some of it may shock parents, very little of it is likely to surprise their school-age children. Whose sensitivity does the association suppose it is protecting? The answer is nobody’s: That organization, like the panicked educators in the film itself, holds fast to its rigid, myopic policies to preserve its own authority. The members of the ratings board perform a useful function, but this is not the first time they’ve politicianed us.


Bully

Opens on Friday nationwide.

Directed by Lee Hirsch; written and produced by Mr. Hirsch and Cynthia Lowen; director of photography, Mr. Hirsch; edited by Lindsay Utz and Jenny Golden; music by Ion Furjanic and Justin Rice/Christian Rudder; released by the Weinstein Company. Running time: 1 hour 38 minutes. This film is not rated.
"Tu doives entendre je t'aime."
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Offline Aloysius J. Gleek

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Re: Bully
« Reply #21 on: March 31, 2012, 09:39:59 am »




[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1g9RV9OKhg[/youtube]
Uploaded by movieclipsTRAILERS on Feb 21, 2012
Bully Official Trailer #1 - Weinstein Company Movie (2012) HD



[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G114cy-fnAw&feature=related[/youtube]
Uploaded by hdonlineucozcom on Dec 16, 2011
The Bully Project Official Trailer 2012 1080p HD
bullying in schools across America
www.hdmgalaxy.com

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(and you know who I am...)


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and Pee-wee in the 1990 episode
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Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #22 on: March 31, 2012, 03:50:44 pm »
Philadelphia City Council members James Kenney and Blondell Reynolds Brown hosted a screening of "Bully" a couple of nights ago. Looking at the news footage, the theatre was packed.
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

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Offline Sophia

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Re: Bully
« Reply #23 on: March 31, 2012, 04:33:41 pm »



[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1g9RV9OKhg[/youtube]
Uploaded by movieclipsTRAILERS on Feb 21, 2012
Bully Official Trailer #1 - Weinstein Company Movie (2012) HD



[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G114cy-fnAw&feature=related[/youtube]
Uploaded by hdonlineucozcom on Dec 16, 2011
The Bully Project Official Trailer 2012 1080p HD
bullying in schools across America
www.hdmgalaxy.com



all this makes me cry so much....this is just horrible. it feels like the western worlds slumdog millionaire. We may not have poverty but we do have the attitude that we can pick on other people.

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Bully
« Reply #24 on: March 31, 2012, 05:48:31 pm »
all this makes me cry so much....this is just horrible. it feels like the western worlds slumdog millionaire. We may not have poverty but we do have the attitude that we can pick on other people.

You don't feel like kids get bullied in the non-Western world? I agree it's horrible, but I would guess there are people in every culture who pick on others.

Also, I would argue that we do have poverty. Though not as prevalent, and with better safety nets.



Offline CellarDweller

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Re: Bully
« Reply #25 on: March 31, 2012, 07:44:30 pm »
I thought "not rated" left things open. Is it possible to acquire a rating of NC-17 after a "not rated" release?

From what I've read of these and other articles, "Not Rated" means just that.  It would be released with no official rating specifying or limiting viewership.

Oh, I may have read it wrong. Somewhere I thought I saw that schools would balk at showing unrated movies, as well, thinking unrated can be an indication of adultish content. But now I see that Weinstein thinks that could be a good solution, so I may have misunderstood.

I'm not sure how things have changed since 1978 (I'm sure they have in some way) but an unrated movie does not mean an unlimited audience.

In 1978 George Romero was set to release his movie "Dawn Of The Dead", and the MPAA wanted to give it an "X" rating due to the amount of violence & gore.  Romero didn't want to edit down his film, and the production compay did not want an "X" rating, because that rating is assoicated with pornography.

The end result was that the film was released unrated, and a disclaimer was added that due to the extreme violence and gore, no one under 18 was to be admited AT ALL.

Obviously, "Bully" is not the same type of movie that DoTD was, however, the fact that it is released unrated could be viewed as a problem, unless the director and production company are pretty clear as to why it is unrated, and just what the film contains so as not to scare off potential viewers.


*side note*  Even with that disclaimer, at age 10 I got into see DoTD with my father, who had no idea what film he was going to see.  We both had nightmares for about 2 weeks.  :laugh:


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Offline Aloysius J. Gleek

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Re: Bully
« Reply #26 on: March 31, 2012, 08:11:48 pm »



*side note*  Even with that disclaimer, at age 10 I got into see DoTD with my father, who had no idea what film he was going to see.  We both had nightmares for about 2 weeks.  :laugh:


 :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:


"Tu doives entendre je t'aime."
(and you know who I am...)


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Offline Sophia

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Re: Bully
« Reply #27 on: April 01, 2012, 07:52:14 am »
You don't feel like kids get bullied in the non-Western world? I agree it's horrible, but I would guess there are people in every culture who pick on others.

Also, I would argue that we do have poverty. Though not as prevalent, and with better safety nets.



'

I may have been a bit unclear with my point. But for me bullying is about values. What kind of values we would like to have in our society. In Sweden every school needs to have an antimobbing plan.
 If a kid is treated badly and the school doesn't do enough about it. He or she can sue the school.

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Bully
« Reply #28 on: April 02, 2012, 01:01:35 am »
'

I may have been a bit unclear with my point. But for me bullying is about values. What kind of values we would like to have in our society. In Sweden every school needs to have an antimobbing plan.
 If a kid is treated badly and the school doesn't do enough about it. He or she can sue the school.

Well, that sounds to me like an enlightened Western world response.

I think bullying is part of human nature, all over the world. Which, needless to say, does not make it OK. The test of the culture is the systems in place to prevent and/or handle it when it occurs.


Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Bully
« Reply #29 on: April 02, 2012, 02:35:39 pm »


  If I got my statistics correct.  Bully was in third place this weekend.  After The Hunger Games, and Clash of the Titans.  That is pretty good.



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Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #30 on: April 02, 2012, 03:52:13 pm »
Got an email this morning from the U.S. Dept. of Health & Human Services (I'm on their mailing list):

HHS and the Department of Education have unveiled an enhanced StopBullying.gov.

The site encourages children, parents, educators, and communities to take action to prevent and respond to bullying.

Visit StopBullying.gov now
.

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Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #31 on: April 02, 2012, 03:58:42 pm »

  If I got my statistics correct.  Bully was in third place this weekend.  After The Hunger Games, and Clash of the Titans.  That is pretty good.

"Bully" pushes its way to $23K per-screen opening

By Joshua L. Weinstein | Reuters – 21 hrs ago.........LOS ANGELES, April 1 (TheWrap.com) -

"Bully," the Weinstein Co. documentary that sparked controversy after the MPAA rated it R -- and refused to change the rating even after nearly a half-million people signed a petition asking for the movie to be rated PG-13 -- opened to a remarkable $115,000 at five locations over the weekend.

That works out to $23,000 per location -- the strongest opening of any documentary in 2012.

The Weinstein Co. released the movie without a rating, rather than with the R that the MPAA gave it. Even as an unrated movie, it generated significant interest.

"We're going to expand April 13 into the top 50 markets -- at least 100 theaters, maybe more," Erik Lomis, the Weinstein Co.'s head of distribution, told TheWrap Sunday. "We're going to focus on a lot of group sales -- we got calls from churches and school groups and the Boy Scouts. You name the groups, we've got them all over the country calling us and requesting information."

He also acknowledged that the company remains in talks with the MPAA.

"We're always in contact with the MPAA," he said.

Lomis said that the Weinstein Co.'s lawyer for this matter is David Boies, one of two attorneys who argued the case that successfully overturned California's Proposition 8, which would have banned gay marriage.

Lomis said that "Bully" "is a hard watch, but it's a very moving film -- and we only had 10 percent of the audience under 18. Maybe that was because of the ratings issue, I don't know, but it leads me to be very optimistic about the potential of this film."

He said he is especially optimistic because exit polls showed that the movie played best among teens.

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Offline Shakesthecoffecan

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Re: Bully
« Reply #32 on: April 02, 2012, 04:10:46 pm »

  If I got my statistics correct.  Bully was in third place this weekend.  After The Hunger Games, and Clash of the Titans.  That is pretty good.

That is amazing for a documentary.
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Offline Sheriff Roland

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Re: Bully
« Reply #33 on: April 04, 2012, 07:02:25 pm »
Bully had it's Canadian premiere at the new Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF) buiding called Light Box earlier this week. It will be released nationally 'in selected cities' on Friday with a PG rating.

Director says move by Canuck censors pushed U.S. theatres to show 'Bully'

http://www.winnipegfreepress.com/arts-and-life/entertainment/movies/director-says-move-by-canuck-censors-pushed-us-theatres-to-show-bully-146137565.html

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Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #34 on: April 06, 2012, 10:14:14 am »
The director considers this a victory?  Seriously?  Thousands and thousands of people had to get involved, and in the end, those very few F-bombs were cut anyway.  That doesn't sound like victory to me.  Why didn't he just cut them to begin with, and not waste people's time?  Publicity stunt anyone?
~~~
Weinstein Co. cuts 'Bully' F-words for PG-13 rating
April 5, 2012, 7:46 PM EST
By Tim Kenneally
TheWrap

The Weinstein Co. has backed down on "Bully," cutting F-words from the documentary to get a teen-friendly PG-13 rating ahead of its April 13 expansion into 55 markets.

The MPAA originally gave the documentary an R rating for language, holding firm despite a grass-roots campaign for a PG-13 rating. After the campaign by Weinstein co-chair Harvey Weinstein, various celebrities and online petitioners failed to sway the MPAA, the company decided to release the movie unrated instead.

At a point in time when bullying in America has reached epidemic proportions, Emmy-winning director Lee Hirsch invites viewers to spend a year in the lives of five students who contend with public torment and humiliation on a daily basis.

The film premiered last week.

The unrated release posed a challenge for theaters chains: one opting not to screen the film at all, two others treating it as if it were rated R, and the AMC theater chain allowing viewers under 17 to see the movie unaccompanied if they brought a permission slip.

"Bully" director Lee Hirsch said he felt "completely vindicated" by the new rating. "While I retain my belief that PG-13 has always been the appropriate rating for this film, as reinforced by Canada's rating of a PG, we have today scored a victory from the MPAA." 

The new rating will also allow various schools, organizations, including the National Education Association and the Cincinnati School District, to screen the film for children as they had hoped.

The new rating came with "great support" from MPAA chairman Chris Dodd, the Weinstein Co. said in a statement. During a screening in Washington prior to the documentary's release, Dodd suggested trimming a few of the curse words to get the lower PG-13 rating.


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Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #35 on: April 06, 2012, 11:52:03 am »
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline David In Indy

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Re: Bully
« Reply #36 on: April 06, 2012, 03:12:38 pm »
The director considers this a victory?  Seriously?  Thousands and thousands of people had to get involved, and in the end, those very few F-bombs were cut anyway.  That doesn't sound like victory to me.  Why didn't he just cut them to begin with, and not waste people's time?  Publicity stunt anyone?
~~~
Weinstein Co. cuts 'Bully' F-words for PG-13 rating
April 5, 2012, 7:46 PM EST
By Tim Kenneally
TheWrap

The Weinstein Co. has backed down on "Bully," cutting F-words from the documentary to get a teen-friendly PG-13 rating ahead of its April 13 expansion into 55 markets.

The MPAA originally gave the documentary an R rating for language, holding firm despite a grass-roots campaign for a PG-13 rating. After the campaign by Weinstein co-chair Harvey Weinstein, various celebrities and online petitioners failed to sway the MPAA, the company decided to release the movie unrated instead.

At a point in time when bullying in America has reached epidemic proportions, Emmy-winning director Lee Hirsch invites viewers to spend a year in the lives of five students who contend with public torment and humiliation on a daily basis.

The film premiered last week.

The unrated release posed a challenge for theaters chains: one opting not to screen the film at all, two others treating it as if it were rated R, and the AMC theater chain allowing viewers under 17 to see the movie unaccompanied if they brought a permission slip.

"Bully" director Lee Hirsch said he felt "completely vindicated" by the new rating. "While I retain my belief that PG-13 has always been the appropriate rating for this film, as reinforced by Canada's rating of a PG, we have today scored a victory from the MPAA."  

The new rating will also allow various schools, organizations, including the National Education Association and the Cincinnati School District, to screen the film for children as they had hoped.

The new rating came with "great support" from MPAA chairman Chris Dodd, the Weinstein Co. said in a statement. During a screening in Washington prior to the documentary's release, Dodd suggested trimming a few of the curse words to get the lower PG-13 rating.





This is very disappointing to me. Since when does cussing deserve an R rating? I've heard plenty of cussing (including the F bomb) in PG-13 movies. So why the R rating to begin with? It doesn't make sense. Not to mention these kids hear plenty of those words in school each day, they hear them on TV (HBO anyone?) and they probably hear their own parents utter them at home at least on a semi regular basis. Hell, I heard my own father drop the F bomb when I was a little kid back in the 1960s. This sort of thing is not at all uncommon.

So what's the deal? ???

Removing those words only serves to eliminate some of the impact from the bullying incidents. It almost seems as if they (the MPAA) wanted to eliminate the impact as if to say "See? This bullying problem really isn't as bad as it seems."

If they want to make a movie about bullying, they need to SHOW it! ALL of it!
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Offline Aloysius J. Gleek

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Re: Bully
« Reply #37 on: April 07, 2012, 12:49:09 am »




If they want to make a movie about bullying, they need to SHOW it! ALL of it!




I agree, David.





http://www.newyorker.com/arts/critics/cinema/2012/04/02/120402crci_cinema_denby?currentPage=all

The Current Cinema
Kids at Risk
by David Denby
April 2, 2012



Is bullying on the rise? The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children claims that a hundred and sixty thousand kids stay home from school each day out of fear, but hard numbers that would identify a trend are difficult to come by. The National Center for Education Statistics has documented a rapid rise in recent years in the number of reported incidents of bullying, but that may reflect an increase in reporting rather than in actual incidents. We can’t measure the current rancor against the bullying of fifty or a hundred years ago, and the causes are difficult to pinpoint. Yet many people feel that kid-on-kid malevolence has become a kind of epidemic, given the prevalence of cyber-bullying and, in particular, the unnerving stories of teen-age suicides that have dominated the headlines in recent months.

Lee Hirsch and Cynthia Lowen, the filmmakers who made the moving documentary “Bully,” don’t try to answer any questions. They avoid charts and graphs, talking heads and sociology. Their approach is more direct and, perhaps, more effective. They chose as their subjects five youths from different parts of the country. As the movie begins, two of them are dead. Tyler Long, of Murray County, Georgia, hanged himself in 2009, when he was seventeen; Ty Smalley, who lived outside Oklahoma City, shot himself in 2010, when he was eleven. The boys’ presence, mostly in old home videos, haunts the film. Both had been persistently bullied. We hear about what happened—physical intimidation, some of it severe—from their inconsolable parents, but why the boys were targeted remains a mystery. Hirsch and Lowen, hoping to celebrate their subjects, have rightly created a lyrical work. They film the other kids at home, at school, and at leisure, as they wander in the woods or around railroad yards. At times, the movie becomes a wistful idyll of rural American childhood under threat. Violence hangs in the air.

One of the subjects is Alex Libby, a twelve-year-old seventh grader at East Middle School, in Sioux City, Iowa. Alex was born prematurely, and he has a slightly curved and flattened upper lip. He’ll be considered cool-looking when he’s older (an American Belmondo), but he doesn’t know that yet, and he has been bullied for his appearance since grade school. The filmmakers embedded themselves at East Middle School for a year, and filmed many children, so as to disguise their real purpose, which was to see how Alex copes with his predicament. He mostly takes it in silence, because he wants to maintain the fiction that his tormentors are his friends. His father tells him to stand up for himself, but some kids are not fighters. Sitting in the back of a school bus, the filmmakers, using a Canon 5D Mark II, which looks like a still camera, managed to shoot a rubbery little heavyweight beating Alex.

Hirsch and Lowen took the footage to Alex’s parents, and they went, enraged, to the school administrators, who had also watched it. The Libbys come across as loving and alert, as do the parents of the two other kids in the film—Ja’Meya Jackson, a fourteen-year-old African-American girl in rural Mississippi, and Kelby Johnson, in Tuttle, Oklahoma, who is sixteen years old and openly gay. Ja’Meya’s mother fights for her daughter in the criminal-justice system after Ja’Meya, tired of being called stupid, waved a loaded revolver at kids on her school bus. Kelby’s father says that, once his daughter came out, the kids at her school turned on her, and the town began shunning the entire family. Kelby, it becomes clear, doesn’t want to pick up and go elsewhere—though she has cuts on her wrist, she’s jolly and combative—and her father supports her decision. The school administrators we see, however, cannot be described as alert. (At East Middle School, the vice-principal assures the Libbys that the students on the bus are as “good as gold.”) Their attitude is one variant or another on “Kids will be kids.” Managing huge public institutions, they don’t know how to change the culture they work in.

“Bully” has powerful friends: the Weinstein Company is distributing it, and celebrities like Ellen DeGeneres, Justin Bieber, and Meryl Streep have been talking it up and appearing at screenings. But only a change in popular culture can seriously affect attitudes, and, at the moment, that change is being impeded by an improbable enemy—the Motion Picture Association of America. The M.P.A.A.’s rating board counted six “f”-words in the film and gave it an R rating, a decision that has effectively destroyed the possibility that the picture will do any good. Most public schools are not going to sponsor screenings of an R-rated film, no matter how high-minded, and somehow I can’t see bullies demanding that their parents take them to the mall to see “Bully.”

Chris Dodd, the former Connecticut senator who is now the head of the M.P.A.A., has said, “If we change the ruling in this case, I’ll have ten other filmmakers lined up saying they shouldn’t be given the R. And who are we to say why this film should be different than the others?” For starters, the M.P.A.A. could consider the context in which profanity is used. In “Bully,” the most virulent use of it is by a boy who threatens Alex Libby in a particularly obscene way. That child uses the word to frighten and to punish. The rest of the language is just color and punctuation, like most profanity, and few middle schoolers today are likely to be wounded by it.

Katy Butler, a seventeen-year-old high-school junior in Ann Arbor, Michigan, who had a finger broken by kids when she was in middle school, began an online petition drive to fight the M.P.A.A.’s rating, which, so far, has more than four hundred thousand signatures. Kids may understand better than their elders what actually threatens them. ♦

"Tu doives entendre je t'aime."
(and you know who I am...)


Cowboy Curtis (Laurence Fishburne)
and Pee-wee in the 1990 episode
"Camping Out"

Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #38 on: April 07, 2012, 07:54:37 am »
Rather long, but interesting, article, off Huffington Post this morning.
~~~


Mark O'Connell, L.C.S.W.Psychotherapist in private practice
 
Over the past two years, a national conversation has developed around bullying. A critical aspect of this conversation is the growing perception of bullying as a real and dangerous threat, as opposed to a normal phase of youth development. At the White House Conference on Bullying Prevention last March, President Obama expressly rejected the idea of bullying as "just a harmless rite of passage or an inevitable part of growing up." While the president should be saluted for his general leadership and this specific observation, another aspect of the conference gave me pause, namely the president's attempt to universalize bully-victimhood, as if each young person is equally vulnerable in this regard. Using his famed charisma, Obama reassured the audience that even he had been teased as a child for his big ears. This moment encapsulates a danger that the conference and the broader conversation on bullying both face: losing sight of the rash of teen suicides, mostly by males who identified as or were perceived to be gay, that originally catapulted the issue of bullying into the national spotlight.

A similar universalization took place last October, at a CNN-sponsored special at Rutgers University entitled "Bullying: It Stops Here." In his opening remarks, Anderson Cooper acknowledged the recent suicide of gay 14-year-old Jamey Rodemeyer, almost a year to the day after the death of Rutgers student Tyler Clementi, who was also gay. Following these remarks, gay teen suicide was never addressed as a distinct or revealing symptom of the problem of bullying, and the program instead focused on bullying as a broad concept, including a Dr. Phil segment on how bullies are victims, too. One illuminating exchange between Cooper and a black high school student offered a chance to reinscribe the particular within the universal: the student explained that his teachers would be more likely to protect him if someone called him "the n-word" than if the same person called him "faggot" or any other anti-gay term. This was not expanded upon.

People can easily agree that bullying for any reason (e.g., race or ethnicity, physical or mental disability, real or perceived sexual orientation) is harmful and wrong. But in the well-intentioned effort to address bullying as a broad concept, specific insights may be lost that can help us understand commonalities behind many forms of bullying and the connection between bullying behavior and our broader culture. The double-digit string of gay teen suicides that launched this national conversation indicate that certain youths are more vulnerable than others to bullying -- or, in other words, there is a real hierarchy to bullying that remains a large, tense, pink elephant in the room. Refocusing for a moment upon these suicides helps to reveal the deeply ingrained ways in which our cultural expectations of what boys and girls are -- and how they should act -- informs every aspect of the bullying problem.

Our culture is ruled by the gender binary, a system to which we all contribute in order to delineate between female and male. While open to contestation, this system frequently preserves a sense of masculinity/power for men, and prescribes one of femininity/submission for women, ultimately securing male dominance. The effects of such a system can be felt beyond the literal image of what a man or woman is; more generally, in a misogynistic culture, every identifiable difference between people is filtered through a misogynistic lens. Indeed, every characteristic for which youth tend to be bullied has been studied in terms of its being "feminized." A quick Google search reveals studies on the "Feminizing of African Americans," the "Feminizing of Asians," of Southeast Asians, of Native Americans, the mentally ill, the mentally retarded, the overweight, and so on. Given these realities, it also holds that a particular group -- or perceived member of a group -- will be more vulnerable to bullying and abuse to the degree that such a group is not supposed to be feminine. This may help to explain why effeminate or gender-nonconforming male youth (i.e., those who are perceived to be gay) are in such regular and tremendous jeopardy, symbolizing as they do a loss of male power and privilege. We may also expect that other targets of bullying singled out for entirely different characteristics may be referred to by terms reserved for effeminate or perceived gay males, because such males are at the very bottom of the cultural barrel.

Lee Hirsch's just-released documentary Bully is an evocative depiction of how the gender binary impacts acts of aggression. The subjects -- several kids facing repeated bullying in school, as well as the families of two boys who committed suicide -- are all seen through a misogynistic lens. The boys are constantly called "bitch" and "pussy," while school administrators try to explain away the harassment, noting that "boys will be boys" and encouraging the youths (at least the boys) to resolve their "differences" with a "manly" handshake. Similarly, though none of the subjects are out, self-identified gay males, the word "faggot" is uttered throughout the film more than any other derogatory term, and in one scene a 12-year-old boy named Alex is threatened on the bus by a peer who says, "I'll shove a broomstick up your ass." According to The Los Angeles Times, this explicitly homophobic scene was the lynchpin in the ratings controversy surrounding the film and was almost cut in order to change the MPAA rating from R to PG-13 -- still another example of the "gay" aspect of this epidemic at risk of being minimized or erased. The two female subjects are featured less in the documentary, and though we do not learn much about them, it is made clear that one of them has deviated from gender and sexual norms, having come out at her school as a lesbian.

The insidiousness of the misogynistic lens even affects how the parents of the children in the film view them. When Alex tells his father how his peers have been treating him, his father's knee-jerk reaction is to suggest that Alex has failed to protect himself and thereby failed to protect his sister, who will be attending middle school the following year. The reaction is clearly borne of love, fear, confusion, and desperation, but it shows just how deeply embedded the gender binary is in our minds, and how we perpetuate it (and its damaging effects) even with the best of intentions. Alex's father unwittingly establishes role expectations for Alex and his sister -- male vs. female, hero vs. victim -- thereby failing to empathize with or validate Alex's experience of victimhood, and instead exacerbating his feeling that he is less than normal.

We may be blind to the misogynistic gender binary in our own country by proximity. Perhaps it is easier to recognize it, and the brutality it inspires, by looking across the globe to the gruesome murders of "emo" youth in Iraq. "Emo," short for "emotional," is an identity adopted from the West, in which tight clothes, piercings, and spiked hair are flaunted as chosen emblems of vulnerability. Since last year over a hundred emo youth, mostly females and gay males, have been stoned to death in Iraq, and the killing hasn't stopped. Scott Long of The Guardian reports, "It's all about boys showing vulnerability in unmanly ways, girls flashing an unfeminine and edgy attitude," and it's causing a "moral panic" in Iraq. The idea of teenagers being massacred for presenting vulnerability and conveying gender-nonconforming expression sounds horrific, but how truly different is it from the bullying currently taking place in our own American communities?

The gender binary and its relationship to bullying may be an elusive and challenging concept for many, because it requires us to self-reflect, examine our own expectations, and perhaps even change some of them. No one wants to feel he or she is part of the problem. But we are, all of us. An awareness of the systems through which we live and perceive the world, and which we maintain everyday, is essential for healing and change to take place.

Part of the solution lies in changing our expectations for how males and females "should" behave, particularly males. We can take a page from the fathers in Bully, all of whom have been forced to walk in the shoes of their victimized, "feminized" children, all of whom now allow themselves to be emotional, to cry, and to take action against this problem. We cannot wait for more young people (and their families) to be destroyed before we too make the necessary adjustments in our expectations of what is "male" and what is "female."

Dawn is coming,
Open your eyes...

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Bully
« Reply #39 on: April 07, 2012, 12:11:03 pm »
Interesting piece! It IS long, but well worth reading. Thanks for posting it, Mandy.


Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #40 on: April 07, 2012, 01:49:53 pm »
Rather long, but interesting, article, off Huffington Post this morning.
~~~


O'Connell missed. The problem isn't misogyny. Nor is it about the expectations of the gender binary. Its about the dishonorable behavior of people who abuse those that they perceive as being weaker than them. Its about power, not gender.

But I do appreciate the effort.
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline serious crayons

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Re: Bully
« Reply #41 on: April 07, 2012, 09:37:11 pm »
O'Connell missed. The problem isn't misogyny. Nor is it about the expectations of the gender binary. Its about the dishonorable behavior of people who abuse those that they perceive as being weaker than them. Its about power, not gender.

I don't think bullying is entirely about gender, nor that it's exclusively directed at people who deviate from the expectations of the gender binary (great phrase, BTW!).

But clearly that is one massive trigger (among others, such as weight or disability) for dishonorable people to abuse those they perceive as weaker.


Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #42 on: April 09, 2012, 09:20:56 am »
Trying to stop it before it starts:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/michael-jascz/bullying-why-social-and-e_b_1411306.html

Michael Jascz
Executive Director, The Relationship Foundation

Bullying: Why Social and Emotional Learning in Schools Is Paramount to Prevention
Posted: 04/ 8/2012 5:24 pm

Let's get in before the bullying starts. If that sounds obvious, I'm not talking about just educating children about the damage that bullying causes -- although those teachings have much merit. Rather, I'm suggesting we educate children on the very basics of human relationships -- the stage before thoughts of aggression and conflict and separation develop into bullying.

Because where and when does bullying begin? How does a child reach the point that they become a bully? Could the things our caregivers say and do, while well-intentioned, set the stage for bullying behavior to later surface? Child psychology has emerged in the last few generations to offer some answers, yet social cruelty among adolescents is increasing. Blame is laid at the door of home life, media, video games, peers, etc. The average American child witnesses 8,000 murders on television before they finish elementary school. Other sources say it reaches 16,000 by the time they graduate high school. We cannot control the home life, cultures, friends, media influence of the children in our school systems. Everyone has a different story, and everyone's story is complex. Pointing fingers does not resolve anything.

Let's ask this question: Why do adults bully to a much lesser extent? Have you ever had a friend call you in the morning and say, "I know who I'm going to hurt today"? Yet some of our teenagers are waking with up with a vengeance. Teens resort to bullying because it is a strategy that they believe will meet their needs: social acceptance, self-confidence, respect and security. As many adults remember from their own school days, peers often reward one another's verbal and physical aggression with increased social status and acceptance. Students who have already been victimized by bullies may resort to similar strategies to regain their sense of self-confidence -- thus, a vicious cycle.

Most adults, however, while wanting acceptance, social status and self-confidence generally have different, and more socially acceptable, means for getting these needs met. Adults have opportunities to develop greater understanding of why they have their feelings and recognize the consequences of TV violence. They have more access to books, courses, and materials that help them navigate trying situations, all of which they did not have in school. Over the years we have learned that hurting others has consequences, sometimes dire. If our children can be encouraged from an early age to communicate clearly about what's really going on for them, then they can make better choices -- where better to do this but where they spend most of their day, in schools?

Bullying and other forms of social cruelty in high schools will not end just with anti-bullying campaigns. In order to change a culture of bullying and aggression, schools must implement teachings that provide an alternative. Bullying prevention begins with encouraging students to talk about their feelings in a language that is safe and helpful. Social skills will not come from an occasional assembly or after a bullying case has gained public attention. Social and emotional education should become a learned vocabulary in day-to-day life.

We've found through our work in New York City high schools that encouraging students to communicate their feelings respectfully is not as challenging as it might seem. Students want to talk about relationships. In our classes, students write essays, journal entries, poems and self-evaluations about the subject. Having a space to discuss relationships takes this complex issue into the realm of honest discussion and awareness. One of the questions we ask students at the beginning of our course is how they would feel if made fun of by a friend in front of their peers. Many students are unable to articulate their feelings at first, saying they would "brush it off" or even "hit someone." After a few classes, however, they are able to describe their feelings more clearly as they become empowered with healthy alternatives. In a safe environment where students are encouraged to discuss their emotions and needs, aggression naturally decreases as students are better able to understand themselves and empathize with others.

The majority of schools across the country have not yet prioritized social and emotional learning or are compelled to allocate budgets elsewhere. Without emphasizing social and emotional learning, schools send the message that these skills are not necessary to academic and personal success. As a result, too many students resort to aggression as the expedient strategy to meeting their needs.

A proactive, preventative approach may sound more costly than media attention and celebrity endorsements toward anti-bullying campaigns, but a strategy based on long-term prevention will never be a waste of money.

Dawn is coming,
Open your eyes...

Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #43 on: April 09, 2012, 10:09:27 am »
Michael Jascz
Executive Director, The Relationship Foundation

Bullying: Why Social and Emotional Learning in Schools Is Paramount to Prevention
Posted: 04/ 8/2012 5:24 pm

I think that a more systemic approach will work. Teach children that there are times, places, and circumstances where aggression is acceptable, and times, places, and circumstances where aggression is unacceptable...and that there are consequences associated with deviating from the prescribed behavioral patterns.
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Bully
« Reply #44 on: April 10, 2012, 02:38:10 am »
   I am sorry.  But in my opinion.  The only things that kids understand.  And I use the term Kids loosly. Is retribution.  They understand
that they are not allowed to hurt someone, if they are going to get hurt in return.  It also works on adults.  ie traffic tickets, fines for late
payments, and losing your job if you don't do a good job there.  Kids will be more likely to obey the rules of behavior, if they are told that
they are going to suffer from consequences.  From detention, or community service.  Beyond that to even be placed in jail, or rehabilitation.  This is a problem that has to be addressed.  I know that a kid in my grandsons school was jealous of him, and picked on him repeatedly.  The kid was seldom if ever punished and my grandson, was always.. considered the one in the wrong.  I went there and talked to the Principal, and she was obviously in the other kids camp.  She said that Ryan was at fault, he was difficult for the kids to get along with.  That he was not telling the truth, about the problems they were having.
   Coincidentally.. that kid moved.  After he was gone.  My grandson never had any more problems...Of course she was right?  He was the problem, not the other bully..  Who by the way was older and larger than my grandson.  A grade higher.  That witch just didn't like Ryan because he didn't come from a well to do family like the other boy....  He has a single mom.  She was going to college at the time.
   It needs to stop NOW!!!!




     Beautiful mind

Offline milomorris

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Re: Bully
« Reply #45 on: April 10, 2012, 11:01:23 am »
   I am sorry.  But in my opinion.  The only things that kids understand.  And I use the term Kids loosly. Is retribution.  They understand
that they are not allowed to hurt someone, if they are going to get hurt in return.  It also works on adults.  ie traffic tickets, fines for late
payments, and losing your job if you don't do a good job there.  Kids will be more likely to obey the rules of behavior, if they are told that
they are going to suffer from consequences.  From detention, or community service.  Beyond that to even be placed in jail, or rehabilitation.  This is a problem that has to be addressed.  I know that a kid in my grandsons school was jealous of him, and picked on him repeatedly.  The kid was seldom if ever punished and my grandson, was always.. considered the one in the wrong.  I went there and talked to the Principal, and she was obviously in the other kids camp.  She said that Ryan was at fault, he was difficult for the kids to get along with.  That he was not telling the truth, about the problems they were having.
   Coincidentally.. that kid moved.  After he was gone.  My grandson never had any more problems...Of course she was right?  He was the problem, not the other bully..  Who by the way was older and larger than my grandson.  A grade higher.  That witch just didn't like Ryan because he didn't come from a well to do family like the other boy....  He has a single mom.  She was going to college at the time.
   It needs to stop NOW!!!!

I agree on both counts.

1. The bully needs to knjow that there will be some punishment. In this regard, I disagree with what the Department of Education (http://www.stopbullying.gov/respond/support-kids-involved/index.html#address) calls "consequences" in its guidelines for dealing with bullies. Writing stories, reading books, and making posters are not going to perceived as a consequence by any child.

2. Janice, you are right on the money when it comes to some teachers and administrators. Some have their heads in the sand, and are either incapable, or unwilling to see an incident as bullying. Others simply don't want to have to deal with it. They are "busy" enough already. I am reminded of a clip from Bully where an administrator (principal, I think) is talking to a couple of parents. When the parents complain about how rowdy the behavior is on their child's school bus, the administrator says that she's been on that bus, and that the children's behavior was "golden."

Beyond that, I have heard from teachers that the parents of bullies can themselves become hostile when confronted with a report of their child bullying another. They will sometimes turn on the teacher, say s/he is lying, threaten him/her with legal action, or even bodily harm. 
  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

--Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #46 on: April 11, 2012, 12:57:41 pm »
Bully": a victory in the ratings war?
By Steve Pond | Reuters – 22 hrs ago

LOS ANGELES (TheWrap.com) - "Bully," the Weinstein Co. documentary that has made about $250,000 at the box office and stirred up weeks of controversy as it fought the R rating handed down by the Motion Picture Association of America, is this year's cinematic cause célèbre.

But as a case study, "Bully" might not have the lasting impact its supporters hope.

The controversy drew an enormous amount of attention to a film that deserves to be widely seen. But is "Bully" a great movie? Can it really help launch an uprising that will put an end to something that has been going on for as long as kids have been going to school? And will it have any real impact on the ratings board or the MPAA?

In the end, the film hasn't shaken the ratings system, hasn't broken through at the box office and will set no precedents at the MPAA.

The big controversy, in the end, may be a case of much ado about not enough.

An undeniably powerful look at the abuse endured by a handful of schoolchildren at the hands of aggressive classmates, "Bully" was rated R for a half-dozen uses of the F-word by school bullies. The Lee Hirsch-directed film, which was titled "The Bully Project" when it debuted at Tribeca last year, lost its appeal by one vote, and prompted an online petition that gathered more than half a million signatures.

Adamant that the rating was unfair, Harvey Weinstein released the film unrated, where it has done respectable business in two weeks of very limited release in New York , L.A. and Toronto.

But Weinstein and MPAA chairman Christopher Dodd also crafted a solution that essentially allowed both sides to claim victory. TWC submitted a new version of the film in which some but not all of the offending words were muted; the MPAA rated the new version PG-13, and allowed Weinstein to put it in theaters on Friday, waiving the typical 90-day window required of re-rated films.

Weinstein got to brag about getting a PG-13 without cutting a crucial scene that contained three F-bombs (two more than are typically allowed without triggering an automatic R), while MPAA ratings maven Joan Graves could say that the system worked by pointing to the edits that were made in the film.

He said: "They saved face, and we won."

She said: "The ratings system has worked exactly as it is supposed to."

The film itself, said TheWrap's reviewer Alonso Duralde, is "a missed opportunity."

Duralde faulted Hirsch for not including any statistics about bullying, and called the film's intent and message "unimpeachable" but its editing erratic and execution flawed.

One thing he didn't mention: The film's near-total reliance on the stories of bullying among impoverished and lower-middle-class students in small towns in the South and Midwest.

Set in Georgia, Iowa, Texas, Mississippi and Oklahoma, the film's lack of context outside those settings makes bullying appear to be a rural and lower-class problem.

Is bullying every bit as vicious and damaging in, say, Beverly Hills or the Upper East Side of Manhattan? No doubt it is. But by focusing exclusively on the schools he does, Hirsch is inviting the kind of response the film drew from one acerbic friend, who said he liked the documentary but was disturbed by how it featured "one toothless cracker after another."

To escape small-town bullying, two of the families depicted in the film have since moved to Oklahoma City. As wrenching as "Bully" is at times, the film would be more effective if it pointed out that bullies surely walk the hallways there, too, as well as in other, far more urbane and upscale environs.

As for the impact of the ratings fight, National Assn. of Theater Owners president John Fithian told the New York Times last week that Weinstein's repeated ratings battles, which also included "Blue Valentine" and "The King's Speech," could in the long term "bring down the voluntary rating system."

But given that Weinstein eventually submitted to that system with "Bully," and given the movie industry's decades-long fear of the government regulation that the voluntary ratings are designed to ward off, that possibility seem miniscule.

Even long-term change could be unlikely.

(For the record, Weinstein admitted to the Times that in the past, he has indeed used ratings battle to get attention for his movies - but in this case, he's doing so out of passion and "not for publicity.")

The "Bully" battle could conceivably lead the MPAA to craft compromises more often, while continuing to insist that the system is working. Christopher Dodd was reportedly helpful in obtaining the PG-13 for "Bully," and he could certainly weigh in on behalf of other films in the future.

But the major studios that make up the MPAA - a group that does not include the Weinstein Co. - have shown not the slightest sign of wanting to junk the system. And the MPAA is adamantly sticking to the same old stance: it's what parents want.

In fact, Graves' public comments on the controversy are straight out of the playbook written and executed for decades by Jack Valenti, the longtime MPAA chief who helped institute movie ratings in the 1960s.

Valenti's favorite tactic was to show off a survey that said a large percentage of American parents thought the ratings system did a good job - and Graves did exactly the same thing in the hearing at which Weinstein narrowly lost its appeal.

The difference: Valenti always showed off the exact figures, while Graves referred to a yet-unreleased MPAA survey about foul language in films. Graves said that the results of that study show that parents "overwhelmingly" do not want the ratings board to overlook language, particularly the F-word.

But while those overwhelming results were summarized during the private appeal, they have not been released. An MPAA spokesperson did not respond to TheWrap's request for a timeline on when that might happen.

So while "Bully" might have caused the MPAA to be a little more flexible, it certainly hasn't caused them to be any more transparent.

The PG-13 version of "Bully" will expand from three to 55 markets next week, and to around 100 on April 20.

..
Dawn is coming,
Open your eyes...

Offline Mandy21

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Re: Bully
« Reply #47 on: May 07, 2013, 01:20:08 pm »
I finally saw this today on DVD, from my local library, which only recently stocked it.  I do not see what in the world the big deal was about the ratings chaos.  The cursing is such a minute, unnoteworthy part of the story that is being told.  It was a good film, and would recommend for parents to check their local libraries to view.  It was an eye-opener, for sure.  The bonus features are worth watching too.  The biggest message I took away from it was one for the parents:  if your child mentions to you, even in the slightest passing, that they are being bullied in some way, LISTEN CAREFULLY because it is only the tip of the iceberg.  The children bear the brunt of shame for not being liked, and are often too embarrassed to report it to anyone.  By the time they do, DO SOMETHING about it quickly, or else it may be too late all too soon.
Dawn is coming,
Open your eyes...