Author Topic: Another viewing, and a revelation  (Read 18836 times)

Offline David

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #10 on: October 16, 2006, 10:41:00 am »
So now I watched the movie last night ... As I watched Ennis close that closet in his trailer at the end, I literally thought "Oh, Ennis. You'll never be able to get past it." 

     I agree with you 100% here.    Alot of folks think that Ennis has made great progress at the end of the movie.   The mailbox, going to alma Jrs wedding, etc etc.

    Wrong!     moving away from town and living in that trailer is one more step to isolate himself from suspecting eyes.    Locking Jacks shirt up in the closet in a shrine may be a sign he accepts Jacks love, but surely not a sign that he will go out and meet a new boyfriend.

Offline silkncense

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #11 on: October 16, 2006, 01:11:26 pm »
Another hug out to you, Barb. 

Sadly, I think you are right in believing things are not better.  I also think family sex abuse is extremely underreported because of the family issues & shame that in itself causes.  I don't mean to go where I shouldn't - but, if you haven't, maybe someday you & your brother can come to a place of peace (which does not mean to say acceptance of his abuse).  His rationalization will be defensive but when/if you are ready - you'll know what to say.

And again you are so right - being a pedophile has nothing to do with one's sexual orientation (straight or gay) they are simply sexually attracted to children.  I have not seen Foley using his being gay - but I have seen the newspapers somehow connect the two. (How typical).  I have, however, seen that he does use sexual abuse as a reason & unfortunately, there is a pattern of the abused becoming abusers.

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Offline ednbarby

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #12 on: October 16, 2006, 01:31:55 pm »
Another hug out to you, Barb. 

Sadly, I think you are right in believing things are not better.  I also think family sex abuse is extremely underreported because of the family issues & shame that in itself causes.  I don't mean to go where I shouldn't - but, if you haven't, maybe someday you & your brother can come to a place of peace (which does not mean to say acceptance of his abuse).  His rationalization will be defensive but when/if you are ready - you'll know what to say.

And again you are so right - being a pedophile has nothing to do with one's sexual orientation (straight or gay) they are simply sexually attracted to children.  I have not seen Foley using his being gay - but I have seen the newspapers somehow connect the two. (How typical).  I have, however, seen that he does use sexual abuse as a reason & unfortunately, there is a pattern of the abused becoming abusers.

Right - Mark Foley himself isn't saying, "Look, I'm gay, and that's why I'm so f***ed up" but the media is absolutely spinning it that way.  Have I mentioned lately how much I hate the media rat bastards that do such evil things?
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Offline ednbarby

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #13 on: October 16, 2006, 01:38:57 pm »
     I agree with you 100% here.    Alot of folks think that Ennis has made great progress at the end of the movie.   The mailbox, going to alma Jrs wedding, etc etc.

    Wrong!     moving away from town and living in that trailer is one more step to isolate himself from suspecting eyes.    Locking Jacks shirt up in the closet in a shrine may be a sign he accepts Jacks love, but surely not a sign that he will go out and meet a new boyfriend.

Right back atcha.  Yes, his closing of that closet troubles me greatly, and on this last viewing I had my moment of revelation at that precise point because it is so troubling.  When the screenwriters themselves say that they don't see Ennis getting any further in terms of accepting himself, and in fact see him actually becoming more isolated and more homophobic, and when the creator ends the story with the line, from Ennis' point of view, "But if you can't fix it, you've got to stand it," there's no way to me he would have ever gotten past it.  Everyone is free, of course, to interpret it as they may and wish and hope the best for him, but I don't see him as getting any further as far as accepting himself goes.  I do like to think of him being a doting grandfather, but that is already in his nature, and of trying harder not to let Alma Jr. and Jenny/Francine down, but that's as far as it goes.
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Offline starboardlight

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #14 on: October 16, 2006, 01:47:05 pm »
yeah, even the beginning of the short story takes place years later and Ennis hasn't moved on. He's still in that trailer by himself with dreams of Jack and the tire iron each night. I had wanted a more redemptive ending, but you're right. He doesn't and can't move on.
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Offline starboardlight

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #15 on: October 16, 2006, 01:57:11 pm »
Right - Mark Foley himself isn't saying, "Look, I'm gay, and that's why I'm so f***ed up" but the media is absolutely spinning it that way.  Have I mentioned lately how much I hate the media rat bastards that do such evil things?

the thing is, there are also other serious issues that's been glossed over. The media only focus on "GAY!!!" In a different state, the 16 year old boys would be at the age of consent, so that blurs the line. We're still talking about a man in his 50's/60's making sexual advance on 16 year olds. Had it been female pages, I'm not sure we'd use the word "pedophile" here. I certainly don't think the media would. Which then leads to another very serious issue that we've not even talked about, sexual harassment in the work place. From Clinton to Folley, these internship system need to be looked at. Protection need to be put in place and so that interns are not even put in the position of having to deal with sexual advances. But no, that'll never happen. The system simply want to blame, not fix the problem.
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Offline ednbarby

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #16 on: October 16, 2006, 02:37:31 pm »
Quote
Had it been female pages, I'm not sure we'd use the word "pedophile" here. I certainly don't think the media would. Which then leads to another very serious issue that we've not even talked about, sexual harassment in the work place.

Excellent points, Nipith.  I've wondered about that first one myself and doubted they'd call it that in that case, too.  And yes, it's really disturbing how this stuff keeps going on with the interns.  At my company, if an employee got caught harassing other employees like that, he and anyone found covering for him in so doing it would be fired, no ifs, ands, or buts.  Our policy on that is very clear, and we all have to retrain on it annually lest anyone forget.  Yet our tax dollars are paying for a system that apparently doesn't even try to protect people from it.  Lovely.
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Offline silkncense

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #17 on: October 16, 2006, 06:02:21 pm »
Guess my own use of 'pedophile' was as a response & in part my lack of knowledge on whether the media had also used the term.  Also, my understanding is that there was no inappropriate physical contact with anyone underage so the term pedophile is not appropriate & hopefully was not used by the media. 
« Last Edit: October 16, 2006, 06:08:35 pm by silkncense »
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Offline ednbarby

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #18 on: October 17, 2006, 08:59:48 am »
I have not noticed the media actually using the term "pedophile," myself.  But I do notice them seeming to try to call him anything else *but* that.  Gay, like that's a reason or a bad thing in general; alcoholic/drunk, like that's an excuse; abused himself, like we should somehow go easier on him because of that.  And I agree with you guys that pedophile may not in fact be the right term for him.  What he definitely is is a sexual harasser.  I'll stop short of calling him a sexual predator as there's no proof of him acting on his obsessions.  And I think it's safe to say he has a sex addiction problem.  To be so obsessed with it as to be sending suggestive messages to the pages while he is voting on the House floor is pretty telling of that.  As I keep telling all my friends, I'm just glad he's a Republican!  (Sorry.  Couldn't be helped.)
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mvansand76

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Re: Another viewing, and a revelation
« Reply #19 on: October 17, 2006, 10:15:18 am »
And now I know, too, why my husband who up until that time had never really cried in front of me wept openly when Ennis found the shirts the time he watched it with me.

I had tears in my eyes when I read your last sentence, you are so lucky to have a person beside you who understands you and loves you and I hope this will be a big step forward for the both of you. Your post also made me realise once again why I love my boyfriend so much and why I take every day to show him that in everything I do.

Thank you so much for sharing this, Barb, and I wish you all the best...

Mel