Hahahahaha, Tit man! Now there's something I've never been called!
In all seriousness, Bex has bumped this thread after I queried what was to happen to all the preparation I've been puting into my role. Since I am an oral sort of person, therefore a nail biter, I've had long bamboo shoots inserted into my fingernail beds, and surprisingly, this has deterred the nibble habit. I have dyed my hair almost every week since winning the role using the little bits of colour that never seem to be used up by the printer before you need to replace the cartridge. I discovered this completely by accident one day when intrigued by modern technology, I was trying to watch how a document was actually printed in there and I'm embarrassed to say I got a little TOO close. But hey, great revelations are born from error. I do, however have to wear a stream of toilet paper around my head as the dye was only serving to stain the rim of my red Stetson. Also, I've had a leather hip case made up so I can carry my adding machine everywhere with me which is coming in so handy when I get the urge to count how many items our local Kmart has for sale.
Props and costume aside, I have taken a more 'method' approach to the role. Very Hoffmanesque of me I know, but I want this to be right! I place a chip of rock salt under my lower eye lid every morning and night to get the flow of tears looking natural. It looks a little lumpy until it begins to dissolve, but I've learned that using the really big chunks is plain silly and that the smaller chips work just as well believe it or not. Something to keep in mind. I have even taken to walking up to stangers to ask if they are waiting for a mating call and as soon as the bruises subside I think I'll be ready for makeup. And as for the back seat scene, I've practiced on every bit of furniture in my, and other people's homes, at work, and once last week I truly felt that I had nailed the essence of the role when I practiced on a bus shelter seat not even needing padding under my knees. This moment was truly a proud moment for me as an audience quickly gathered and just couldn't take their eyes off my performance. Even a bus delayed its departure to observe my portrayal. I knew at that moment, it was worth sKraG fighting Mandy and Kelda for this part because I will bring such life to the character.
So in short, I think I'm ready. Just give the word "Action" and I'm there!
I'm off now to do some serious barrel racing around the traffic lights at the main intersection down the road. I like using the traffic poles as they don't tend to fall over if I cut in too closely. I do it on foot of course as a horse world only draw too much attention and the drivers would probably get distracted in their cars.
