I see the enormity of the events of Alexias’ birth date as being a double-edged sword.
He was born one month premature and, as such, was not a robust, attractive baby – definitely a runt. As a consequence, his father intended to expose him on a hillside, for the wolves to devour. Imagine having to carry that with you for the rest of your life! I’m getting mixed feelings about the father. Certainly, there is that John Twist aspect to his personality (urinating on your infant son must be right up there in the “despicable acts” stakes, with exposing your baby son); however, having said that, I get the feeling that his heart wasn’t really in it. Certainly, he was called away to war before he could act, but he could have easily left instruction for the deed to be done. He didn’t do this. One could argue that the reason he ultimately decided not to expose his son was a selfish one – it was better to have a runt son than no son at all, seeing as his wife and other son had subsequently died of the plague – “. . . (my father) thought it less disgraceful to leave even me behind him, than to perish without offspring as if he had never been.” And then the wet-nurse fattened him up, and he was stronger and better looking and “. . . (my father) named me Alexias, as he had first meant to do.” So, even though daddy was a brute, he came to accept his son.
His mother did not have that opportunity. She was dead from the plague when he was only days old. Whereas his father did come to accept him, he must live the rest of his life believing that his mother went to her grave disowning him – “From the first she had ordered me to be kept away from her.”
And of course, we also have the fact that he was born in a time a plague, when his mother, brother, Uncle Alexias and god knows how many other family members died. Gotta be a bad omen for any new baby’s birth! And coupled with this, the tragic circumstances of his uncle’s death, in the arms of his lover.
I believe this latter event, though tragic, is the positive, inspirational aspect of the double-edged sword. His uncle gave up his life to be with the man he loved, to “. . . make the journey together.” His father wanted to respectfully mix the ashes of the lovers together. This was not to be, their bodies having already been disposed of on a common pyre in the street.
We are told that, “. . . my grandfather had a stone set up for Alexias in the Street of Tombs, with a relief showing the friends clasping hands in farewell, and a cup beside them on a pedestal. Every year at the Feast of Families, we sacrificed for Alexias at the household altar, and the story is one of the first that I remember. My father used to say that all over the City, those who died in the plague were the beautiful and the good.” (so, maybe he wasn’t such an old rotter after all – time will tell!)
Importantly, “. . . the story (of Alexias and Philon) is one of the first that I remember,” indicates to me that despite the premature runt status, the loathing of his father and mother, the loss of his mother and brother, the plague and the war (gasp!), he carries the inspirational legacy, that his namesake tragically and nobly died, honourably and with dignity, in the arms of the man he loved.
The story of Alexias (the uncle) and Philon touches me so much…even the way it is presented…not as a ‘gay’ thing…just a normal accepted even admired relationship. And the nobility and love they showed….Philon didn’t call for Alexias…wanting to protect him, and I wonder if Alexias really felt himself getting sick or did he just love Philon so much he couldn’t bear for him to go on that journey alone?
Beautifully expressed, Jess. I too was touched that Philon chose to not call for Alexias, because he wanted to protect him. And I also wondered about Alexias getting sick. My romantic heart tells me he wanted to be with his beloved, Philon, on that long, long journey.