I feel one may need to be careful reading into what Ennis 'thought' of what he was feeling before the first reunion. At least in the short story, Ennis told Jack it took him a year to realize that he got sick that day they separated in Signal, cuze he should never have let Jack out of his sight. Which is about as close as Ennis ever got to saying the word love in relation to Jack. Then how much truth, half truth, or just out right ignoring of the truth did these two lay on one another, and themselves? I get the feeling, this is do to a good bit of their up bringing, as about anything else. Neither of these men seem to have been shown the possibilities and wonders that life could contain. In some ways, it's almost like neither of them fully believe they deserve to be happy. Though on Jack's part, it may be more a subconscious shooting of himself in the foot that keeps him from seeing beyond the immediate desire to making his dreams a reality.
I keep coming back to the very beginning of the story where Proulx tells us these were two poor high school drop outs going no where. That poverty, that lack of a sense of accomplishment at even that early of an age, it might be as much an clue as to why these two feel trapped in their own existences, and a good reason both sought employment well beneath their actual skills. Ad in, that neither one seems to have had a father that showed them any real affection or approval, and you've got two characters that were never given the tools to make the hard decisions in life. At the very least, their decisions were made with out the old saw of examining their own lives.
Rather than thinking through plans Ennis might accept so they could be together, Jack seems to react to situations with out being able to fully imagine a way to make them work. Say, Jack had put forth that little cow and calf operation as something he was going to set up, and he wanted to 'hire' Ennis as foreman. There are several ways Jack could have come at this, none of which he apparently ever considered. In the end, Jack's father seeing Jack as a dreamer without the whit to make his dreams reality, is closer to the truth than I really want to admit.
Then Ennis, for better or worse, seems to have had scared into him a sense of right and wrong, that did stand him in doing right by others as he saw it. It also gave him the ability to stick with a job and get it done. Once, he had set his mind to it. Of course, Ennis's sticking it out, no matter what, was also the better part of his own excuse and problem with ever letting him try to look at the world beyond 'if you don't have nothing, you don't need nothing'. It's only because of the power of what he he feels for Jack, that lets him keep coming back year after year. A love neither is willing to name. A dream Jack can't figure out how to make real. And Ennis, he feels so beat down by his own lack of imagination, he never gives himself the chance to really stick it out with Jack. These two characters feel to me like they are trapped by the way they were raised. Or, the lack in the way they were raised. Jack, by his dad never showing him nothing. And Ennis, by being shown most all of the wrong things in what it takes to make life worth the living.
I just get the feeling neither of these men are fully capable of looking beyond their immediate need and desire for one another, to actually put into words or thought about where they are at in their lives. Let alone, where they might be, or how to get there. Perhaps, the very power of what they feel blocks them from thinking about their situation, for fear they might lose what little they do have with one another.
Oooo... ok, so much for my morning ramble from here to back and wondering if that makes some sense.
