I was 17 in 1963 (a 60-year old straight female) and lived on the east coast where things were different than in the rural west. However, my parents best friends were two gay men--Jim & Bill. Everyone just referred to them as "the bachelors" which to me simply meant two guys who weren't married and were roommates. I don't remember anyone in the neighborhood who were all friends ever leaving them out or saying anything strange about them. Nor did being "bachelors" connote anything other than being unmarried--at least as far as I ever knew. I don't even remember any smirks or innuendos that made me wonder. Maybe it would have been different if they hadn't been such nice and friendly people. I don't know.
We moved to Maryland in the DC area when I was 9 in a garden apartment and Jim and Bill were neighbors. When we bought a house a few miles away, the house across the street was for rent and Bill and Jim rented it. So, they were family friends from '55 until Jim finally married in about '61. It wasn't until I was in college that my parents told me they were gay. Bill eventually moved back to Mississippi where he was from. I found his number and called him about 10 years ago and he'd been married for 25 years by then. I don't know what the deal was and neither I nor my parents cared. Nor did anyone else seem to.
Bill was my "go to" guy when I was a teenager. I could talk to him when I couldn't talk to my parents. Jim and Bill were always like family and often spent holidays--especially Thanksgiving--with us. Given that my Father, in particular, was from the south and regularly used the "N" word (although I never saw him do or say an unkind word to a black person), apparently neither of my parents were prejudiced against gays, nor did I get the sense that any of their friends were either because Jim and Bill were always included in all the social activities of the community.
I think I was very lucky in having grown up in such an accepting environment. However, it was also more of a "don't ask, don't tell" kind of thing. But people back then didn't air their personal laundry about anything--at least in groups. They did talk about their problems in private to their close friends, but not in public. It just wasn't done.
As for the times, people were more repressed in a way but things were also far more civil. People conformed more to traditions except the artistis. It was expected for them to be more "out there." There was next to no social integration along racial lines but not along educational or employment ones--at least not to the same degree. I remember my prejudiced father going up the chain of command to get one of his draftsman--a black man--a raise. I thought it odd given how prejudiced my father was but when I asked him about it, he said the guy could be purple for all he cared, he had earned the raise, and by damned, my Father was going to make sure he got it because fair was fair. And he did get it for him. By the same token, my father would never have invited this guy to a social event. Society was much more statified, especially along racial and "social class" lines but it was also much less contentious.
By the late 60s, however, all that changed. I suspect it began with Kennedy's assassination. The only thing to compare it to in terms of its impact on the country was 9/11. The entire country was in deep mourning, I don't remember anyone rejoicing about it. And even if they had, the media would never have covered it. Living in the DC area, my best friend's father took us down to the capitol and we stood in line and walked through the rotunda to pay our respects. The line and crowd were enormous and everyone was crying. There was a hopefulness in the country throughout his presidency that died when he did. Things began to change after that and by '67, the country had changed dramatically.
It was certainly fun being a part of the Woodstock generation! I wonder, however, what has happened to all those former hippies: "peace, love, and rock and roll!" It seems that far too many of them have turned into judgmental neocons. Maybe they'd have remained more tolerant had they kept smoking pot and been able to see the possibilities life had to offer!
